Fundies Critique the movies:

[YellowRubberDuckie]

OH. My. God. Did you know that impossible occurances are offensive to God? You have to got to see this insane website where Fundies go see movies, take notes, then tell parents if their kids can see it or not.
http://www.capalert.com/now_playing.htm
I clicked on Pirates of the Caribbean. Apparently, there is a lot of cleavage, repeated drunkenness, and it is offenseive to God because Davey Jones' ship was used as a submarine. IN A MOVIE. :eyes: Also, since a lot of things happened that were impossible, it's offensive to God. Oh, how I urge you to take a look and wonder for a moment at the stupidity of them.
Duckie

[NMMNG]

1. They are completely whacked

What the heck could you have in a movie if you took out everything they find objectionable? They even find things like this inappropriate:

man and woman making out in car
man and woman in bed making out
marital argument
gunfire to kill predator (They list this as "Wanton Violence/Crime". I guess it would be better to just let the predator attack and kill its intended victim. :shrug:)


And the list goes on and on. :crazy:

[Jamastiene]

19. Aren't these the same bunch who normally boast

of having a gun around to kill anything or anyone who gets in their way? They make no sense to me. Does not compute.

[Evoman]

2. I offend god on a daily basis

and nothing really bad has happened to me yet. Being that he invented dicks and clits, you'd think he wouldn't be so offended by some fucking cleavage.

Is god a kid or what?

[Tenseiga]

3. only in the eyes of the holy rollers

seriously, check out the review(s--- there's a partial and a full) on Dogma... dudes are seriously in need of some critical thinking

[Deja Q]

4. Quite. It's critical they start thinking...

:D


:hide:

[Richard Steele]

17. OK, you got me curious: I just gotta see their opinion of 'Dogma'!

I bet they had to cut it into 30-second clips
and review it in teams to avoid head-explosions!

Edit: just read it: BO-RING!
I prefer my entertaining crazies served FROTHING;
these idiots is hardly even defrosted.

I had a bad feeling when I saw they had deleted the word "laid",
that's just sad. And it got LAMER from there.

[Jamastiene]

20. Like Larry Flynt says,

If you don't like nudity, complain to the manufacturer, not Larry Flynt. In other words, God sent us into this world nekkid and complete with the supposed offending parts. Go complain to him if ya don't like the human body.

[Broken_Hero]

5. oh, geez...

and yet, the bible is by far the most violent, sexual, most perverted book I have ever read, by their own standards, the bible is evil!

[jobycom]

6. Doesn't that rule out the Bible?

Lots of sex, incest, rape, and people walking on water. Seems like it would offend God, too.

[Lars39]

7. *sniff*

I can't believe they didn't like Talladega Nights. :rofl:

[Gatchaman]

8. Look up their review of the South Park movie

it's an all time classic

[LTR]

9. Their review of "Brokeback Mountain" was pretty hilarious

Right now, I'm reading their review of "Bowling For Columbine". Of course, they are appalled by it.

:rofl:

This site kinda sucks. They didn't review "V For Vendetta", "An Inconvenient Truth" or "Fahrenheit 9/11" (wanted to see how they handled political fare), but they did review some pretty obscure crap that I'd barely heard of.

[sbj405]

10. "male car exhibiting rear underside to female car"

From the "Cars" review.
:rofl:

[NMMNG]

11. Bwahahaha

Apparently even telling their own Bible stories is not allowed. Their review of The Passion of the Christ was rife with complaints about violence, mistreatment of Jesus, offenses to God etc. :wtf: is the problem--according to you (Fundies) it's your Savior's glorious predetermined history to save you from your sins. The stuff in the movie was based on your Bible! :crazy:

[pstokely]

12. They consider "Christmas without Jesus" "Offensive to God"

Look at their review of "Elf"
http://www.capalert.com/capreports/elf.htm

[Commie Pinko Dirtbag]

26. That's nothing

In a Rugrats movie, it seems Mr. and Ms. Pickles are seen at a Paris restaurant... brace for it... gasp... DRINKING WINE!!! BOOZE offends the LAWD!!!!

[pstokely]

13. More fundie movie reviews

http://christiananswers.net/spotlight/home.html

[sakabatou]

14. I hear there's a place which does TV shows, too

[pstokely]

15. They want more MST3K worthy cheesy movies like "The Buttercream Gang"

A small town kid goes to Chicago and comes home a gangsta, his best friend doesn't do anything.
http://www.familytv.com/trailers/ButterCreamGang_trailer_360.asp?SID=&PID=&country=
http://www.us.imdb.com/title/tt0103900/
I had to watch this in school, it was lame when it was less than five years old.

[MissHoneychurch]

16. Brokeback Mountain

Brokeback Mountain is truly a magnificent production with beautiful scenery and outstanding talents. All these features combine most effectively to make a pretty picture of evil, intricately weaving smooth talk and heartstring tugging portrayals to change God's Word into a lie.
<...>
And they in the film who are opposed to the practice of homosexuality are portrayed as small minded, intolerant, selfish and as redneck murderers.

[Jamastiene]

22. Not to mention that World

Net Daily article where the person claims that the music in the movie is crafted to subliminally makes you feel compassion for gay people. :wtf:

[Richard Steele]

18. Each review costs them over $300! DONATE NOW!! God needs CASH!!!!!

Who the FUCK is stupid enough to believe that crap?
It costs 300 bucks to rent a friggin DVD and write a review of it? :rofl:

Maybe they're spending big bucks for that high-tech modern WebSite? :rofl: :rofl:

Anyone who is pig-stupid enough to send these conmen their money
is probably doing themselves a favor;
they might have used it to buy pretzels and choked to death!

[haf216]

21. In the review for World Trade Center, they are worried because the man

women are only "stage" married and are in the same bed together and not really married. Can everyone say MOVIE?

[Bassic]

23. What the hell is the most foul of the foul words?

:shrug:

[Commie Pinko Dirtbag]

24. Fuck -nt

[Bassic]

25. Oh, I thought that was the four letter word they keep referring to. nt

[Kerrytravelers]

27. The f- - - word. Remember "A Christmas Story?" The "fudge" word.

[Bassic]

29. I don't think I've ever seen/read that.

:shrug:

[Kerrytravelers]

28. I saw You, Me and Dupree. Where is all this male nudity?

I saw Owen Wilson's ass in a quick shot from maybe 15 feet away. It wasn't like their hero Mel Gibson's ass close-up in "Bird on a Wire" and many other films.