water seeks its own level

[datasuspect]

and i'm surrounded by idiots, so i guess i know what category i fit in.

[progmom]

1. maybe you're a buoy

:hug:

[billyskank]

2. ...

:yourock:

:hug: :loveya:

[datasuspect]

3. ugh

it is way too hot and today i am seem to be surrounded by people with few teeth and who speak in an indecipherable east texas drawl.

"yuk, yuk, yuk! yee haw!"

[progmom]

4. that sounds like a version of hell

but i have a lot of evidence that you are far from an idiot yourself. :hi:

[datasuspect]

5. it is hell

and i wonder sometimes i will get out of it, but i manage to keep waking up and shutting down.

the amazing thing is that i don't drink myself into a stupor everyday anymore.

it stopped working.

i think pain can reach a zenith sometimes and you don't feel it anymore. i need to get out more.

thanks for your understanding.

smooches.

[progmom]

6. i know you've had some really rough times lately

just know that while all this is going on, you're not actually alone, ok? there's a whole bunch of us on DU who are rooting for you. seriously. :hug:

[datasuspect]

7. i've created a lot of my own hell

but the person i've hurt the most is myself. it is rage-making at times though, because i try to make right a lot of things, but i can't seem to get any traction. it's like one bad thing after another. when it rains it pours

i need to quit feeling sorry for myself. i dug the hole, i need to undig it.

but damn, i just feel so fucking alone sometimes.

[progmom]

8. that can be a terrible feeling

I'm not sure there is anything worse than feeling like you're alone.

I'll say it again, though. You're not alone.