Wow, apparently the end of the world is nigh

[LeftyMom]

I hear helicopters and sirens outside and there's a hint of smoke in the air. So either it's the rapture or a grass fire. Whatever, I'm cool either way. :shrug:

[flvegan]

1. If it is the rapture, then what happens

1. to unborn babies?

2. planes in which the pilots are raptured, but the people are not?

[LeftyMom]

4. You do realize God stole this whole plotline from The Langoliers?

I liked this story better when Stephen King wrote it. Apparently there's an MI6 guy on the plane who lands it safely. There's no mention of random feti lying wetly on the seats in coach amongst the fillings and titanium hips, so presumably they evac with Mom.

[flvegan]

6. Hmmm...

well, it better not bloody well be the rapture. I'm leaving for the gym now, and don't need that kind of traffic.

BTW, oddly enough, there's a chopper over my house, too.

[LeftyMom]

9. Yeah, but you could swipe a bigger vehicle on the way.

More importantly, what happens to thier companion animals. Fuck, that'd be a mess.

That's it, rapture canceled.

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

27. There was a chopper over my house this morning.

Maybe the feds are just coming to get us all.

Feds or the rapture, either way, they just better wait, because I'm having veggie tacos for dinner and quite looking forward to it.

[flvegan]

28. Must...resist...

"eating veggie taco" response...

D'oh!

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

30. The kind made with TVP, perv.

:P

[LeftyMom]

31. Somewhere in Florida,

a man sits trying to determine something naughty with the initials TVP. :eyes:

[flvegan]

32. I did

but it's unpostable.

Tantalizing Veggie *

ANYway...

[LeftyMom]

33. you are so predictable.

:rofl:

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

35. That's pretty clever.

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

34. I ended up making it easier for him.

We had a striped bass filet that needed to be eaten tonight. So um...yeah, I ate fish tacos for dinner. I'll probably use up the leftover taco fixins' with veggie tacos tommorow.

[billyskank]

5. Oh, the planes will crash

They say to expect all kinds of crashes and fires and other accidents where people formerly performing responsible jobs have been raptured.

They also say that there will be piles of clothes left behind where people have been raptured.

So let me get this straight. You go to heaven in your physical body, butt naked.

What kind of moran thought this up?

:wtf:

[LeftyMom]

7. A sorta funny story about that.

Somebody linked to a thread asking the baby question over on the rapture ready message board. On the first page of replies somebody tells the person asking the question that all fetuses and kids under 12 are raptured, regardless of belief, because that's what it says in Left Behind.

A full page later somebody finally checks a bible, which says something else entirely.

Sounds like idolatry to me.

[billyskank]

10. Wow...I didn't know the Bible even mentioned rapture

I honestly believed it was a load of cobblers somebody made up quite recently.

Learn something new every day! Thanks! :)

[LeftyMom]

13. Well it doesn't really

This person's argument was that in previous instances in the Old Testament, such as when Lot's family flees the destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah, God didn't spare the children of unbelievers. There was also some new testament verse referencing the suffering of nursing mothers at the end of the world or something, but my eyes were starting to glaze over.

In any case, Revalations has more to do with the end of Rome than anything else.

[billyskank]

15. Ah, that's what I don't like about Bible study

far too much conjecture and interpretation going on.

[LeftyMom]

16. And apparently "we don't know" isn't a valid answer.

Not my thing either. :shrug:

[billyskank]

17. Of course really it always comes down to

"well, I think God meant this."

Which always happens to fit exactly the prejudices of the person doing the thinking. How convenient.

[LeftyMom]

19. God loves us enough reinforce all our pettiness and spite. Nice of him,

wouldn't you say?

[billyskank]

20. Given that I do believe in God

I don't blame Him. Whether we are created by Him or not, people undeniably possess independence, which includes the ability to be horrible to one another.

[MnFats]

37. this rapture bit is really less than 100 years old...

....
it's made-up doctrine cooked up by lunatic pseudo-Christians.
ask a Catholic or Episcopalian friend about it.
but there's goofy fundamentalists who take it to have been the word of Jesus himself.

[HiFructosePronSyrup]

12. The planes will crash for two reasons...

1. The pilots themselves will be raptured.

2. In the event that the pilots were sinners (and what pilots aren't), the raptured will get sucked into the jet engines and bring those planes down the hard way.

[LeftyMom]

14. That would suck

3/4 of the way to heaven and you get sucked into the engine of a 747. Perhaps God embraces schadenfreude- that would explain a lot about the world. :D

[Dangerously Amused]

23. Would it be bad if I picked up their Jimmy Choos?

I mean, it's a sin to be wasteful, right?


Oh - and what might people need their body for in Heaven, anyway? Do they have gravity there? I figure they must, since angels have wings to give them lift from... something.

[Dangerously Amused]

21. And stem cells? Which are really no different than human beings, you know.

:scared:

[LeftyMom]

22. Snowflake babies will float up to heaven

Unfortunately they will melt on the way and die. God's ways are mysterious.

[Dangerously Amused]

24. I wondered abaout that.

If they pass too close to the sun on the way to Heaven, they'll probably just vaporize.


How sad.



=POOF=

[joneschick]

2. well, I can't login to the Sacbee.com

but 'Kitchen fire forces evacuation of downtown complex' is a current/breaking story........or it could be the apocolypse.

[LeftyMom]

3. I'm not downtown

I'm in the south area, so that's not it.

It smells like a grass fire though. I'm guessing that's it.

[xmas74]

8. Did you stock up on marshmallows and soy dogs?

I know what I plan on doing when the Rapture comes. I'm looting the stores for soy dogs and hot dogs, marshmallows, Hershey bars, graham crackers and beer.

There are supposed to be fires from car crashes and no firemen to put them out. I figure I'll put all the fires to good use and feed my belly.

[LeftyMom]

11. Sacramento's not very religious

Honestly if all the True Believers (TM) in my neighborhood disappeared, I don't think the effect would be noticable. Except we'd have to find a new lawn kid.

[xmas74]

18. Well that just sucks.

We have quite a few over here. I've been scoping out their houses, deciding which one I want when they leave. There's a really cute Victorian that I've had my eye on for awhile now.

[CanuckAmok]

25. Not just nigh...

[LSK]

26. now that you bring it up, isnt today Rapture day??

:shrug:

[LeftyMom]

29. So far they're all still here.

Apparently God can't stand fundies either. :shrug:

[NewWaveChick1981]

36. OK, the fundies are still here. No rapture yet.

Unless you count what's happening in Cuba. On the first day of August. In a terrible heat wave.

:hi: