All these 'obnoxious kids in theatres, etc.' threads

[Oeditpus Rex]

make me think, "Why don't people say something?" Why do most of us just sit there and take it, and let it wreck our evening or whatever? Are we that afraid of confrontation? :shrug:

[951-Riverside]

1. Yes.

I'm sure if most of us tried it we would be kicked out by the theater.

[Oeditpus Rex]

2. Maybe

But if enough of us tried it, maybe the theatres would get the message.

Anyway, I'm not advocating "SHUT THAT FUCKING KID UP!" or something. One should be polite, but firm.

[Deep13]

3. It's my experience that the parents of such rug-rats...

...are themselves possessed of an egocentric self of entitlement and generally accost the anyone who confronts them as being anti-child.

[Oeditpus Rex]

7. I wouldn't doubt that

But when you're right, and you speak for the majority? :shrug:

Someone posted in another thread that they once told someone in a theatre to get off their cell phone, and that the offender seemed about to say something but others spoke up and/or applauded. Seems to me this would frequently be the result of one person speaking up.

Hell, we can get half a million people to march on Washington, D.C. We can't get half a dozen in a theatre or whatever to make a statement to management?

[izzybeans]

10. Good luck with that mission when it comes to a child. You can't turn it

off like a cell phone.

[Cannikin]

25. dupe

[Missy Vixen]

42. The night before the Oscars

we were in a local theater for a showing of "Brokeback Mountain". The woman behind us would not get off her cell phone. The woman next to us politely asked her to do so. The woman with the cell phone assaulted the woman sitting next to us in response.

>Seems to me this would frequently be the result of one person speaking up.<

We have repeatedly experienced the opposite -- no matter how courteously the request is worded, those who believe that their comfort and their needs are more important than an entire group of people tend to act out when spoken to about their selfishness and their inability to exhibit appropriate behavior. Let's face it, we don't know who is armed these days.

It's easier for DH and I to simply either stay home, or wait till the movie comes out on DVD. If we are in a restaurant or other venue, we ask for our food to go and leave. We're spending an awful lot more time these days either at the homes of friends, or having friends over to our house as a result.

Julie

[1gobluedem]

4. Probably

Complaining at these places rarely works. I get so enraged when people with packed shopping carts blithely use the express lane in the grocery store and nobody says anything. I carefully count my items and use the regular lane if I exceed the stipulated amount. When I finally did say something to the cashier she told me that they aren't allowed to chastise customers who take their full loads through the express lane because management is afraid of upsetting the customers. Apparently, they don't mind upsetting those customers who follow the rules and this particular grocery store lost me as a customer because of that.

I know sometimes, if there is no one in the express lane and the others get backed up the cashier will invite you to use the express lane but this wasn't one of those times.

[Lydia Leftcoast]

5. I did say something once

I was at the ballet ("Coppelia") with a friend, and behind us was a little girl who kept asking during the whole first act, "Daddy, you said the doll was going to move. When is the doll going to move?" And she wasn't asking in a whisper either, but in a loud voice. "Daddy" made no effort to shush her.

At intermission, I turned around and saw that she was no more than five, too young to sit through a full-length ballet. I said, "The doll is going to move, but you don't have to keep asking about it."

People around me smiled, but "Daddy" was terribly insulted and accused me of being intolerant of children. I didn't want to get into an argument, so I just turned around.

At least I didn't hear any more during the second act.

My experience has been that the worse behaved a child is in public, the more likely the parents are to get nasty when you comment on it.

I once grabbed a little girl off a rickety pile of chairs that she was climbing on and set her on the floor. She started yowling and ran to her mother complaining that I wouldn't let her climb on the chairs. Her mother, instead of thanking me for possibly saving her daughter from injury, laid into me about interfering with the child's fun. I thought, "Okay, lady, next time, I'll just let the chairs fall on her."

[EstimatedProphet]

13. You have a good point here

My experience has been that the worse behaved a child is in public, the more likely the parents are to get nasty when you comment on it.

I think that's a really good point. One thing I have seen is that many times children are bratty to get their parent's attention. They learn at an early age to play their parents like a fiddle, and it the parents happen to be the in-your-face bitching about how their child can never do anything wrong, then it is more likely that they will have kids that will try and bring that aspect out for fun.

[Beware the Beast Man]

6. That's because 88% of them are probably exaggerated B.S.,

based on the poster's biases.


but that's just me...

[WCGreen]

8. I always say something.....

Like shut the kid up...

Or...

What are ytou bringing a three year old to an R Rated movie for....

Or...

I go to the manager and say I want my money back...

[ScreamingMeemie]

9. All I know is...I'm taking my kid to the late show, because I can,

every night next week. :thumbsup:

[Oeditpus Rex]

11. Rabble rouser!

Fifth Columnist!

Seditionist!

INfiltrator!

Why do you hate Mer'ka? :cry:

[billyskank]

18. Delete

No point

[distantearlywarning]

12. Usually the parents with the most obnoxious children

are also the ones who are most likely to escalate to nuclear levels when confronted with the suggestion that their little darlings might not be wonderful and perfect in every way.

With the level of arrogant self-righteous entitlement a lot of people display today, you risk getting into a fistfight or worse if you speak up about stuff like that. And the other ostriches in the movie theater or wherever won't stand up for you - they just want to "stay out of it". You'll be all by yourself facing a psychotic, screaming, defensive parent.

[LoZoccolo]

33. WINNER!

:thumbsup:

Then everyone starts blaming you for getting in the fight with the parent and making more noise.

[Broken_Hero]

14. off topic, a bit...

but I am the second oldest of 12, and when Home Alone came out, there was a huge buzz about it, and when I wanted to watch it, my parents didn't want to go, but my brothers/sisters did, and they were all young, between 2-9 yrs old, so here i am, dragging kids to the damn movie(1st time for home alone), and my younger bro dave is throwing a fit, and his fit, is close to the end of the movie(which is the best part of the whole damn movie), and i take him out in the lobby, and try to calm him, and of course, i'm out there for the remainder of the movie, and i miss the best part...

Everyone is coming outta the theater, laughing, talking about the movie, so i'm pissed...i go home, tell my mom film was great, funny...so, next night my mom wants to go, we take all the kids...same thing, happens, david throws a fit, right before the house invasion, and i'm out in the effing lobby, trying to calm this kid...

But, third times, a charm...just told my mom, i was going to the park, to go play, and took off to the theater, and finally watched Home Alone, all the way through...

In my experience, bringing young kids, very young kids, to a movie, isn't such a great idea, but to each their own, and if you kid does start throwing a fit, take the kid out in the lobby, and away from everyone else...

Another side story, babies on airplanes, are a lot lot lot lot worse...flight from denver, to sacramento about three years ago...god damn, son of a bitch. Not that I hate kids, in the least bit, my wife and I are trying like mad to have kids, but there was a single mother on the plane, sitting right next to me, she had three kids, and the youngest was screaming, yelling, throwing shit around, just a plain kick in the nuts, kid basically. Me, being the guy i am, helped the single mother out, but the young one, would get more agitated, when i would try to console her, so i just stuck to the other two kids...

And, no shit...the alcohol was flowing, with the rest of the passengers, every single passenger, in the rows in front/behind/to the side of us, were ordering drinks like mad...but shit like that happens, but i would take a crying kid in a theater anyday, over a kid crying in an airplane...:)

[Ravenseye]

28. We just took our daughter across country

Travelling on a plane can be nearly impossible to keep your children from crying or flailing, particularly if they're toddlers. If they get bored, forget it. Heck we even bought a portable DVD player just for the trip to be able to zombify her if necessary. It was pretty exhausting. Then on top of it if you're on a plane that goes up or down to fast and you have the fun pressure ears...well it's just about over. Nothing you can do can definately help your kid. If they're breastfeeding still that can help. The only time I get angry at parents with kids on planes is when they seem to not care. LIke the kid is going crazy and crying and they're reading their romance novel oblivious. As long as they're TRYING, then you can't get angry at them.

You can't, as long as they're trying, because air travel isn't an optional thing like going to the movies is generally.

[Arugula Latte]

31. Air travel is verrry stressful with little ones.

I always have a huge fear of being one of those people that all the passengers are muttering under their breath about.

When we took our kids on a five-hour plane ride (they were quite small), I tried to think of every trick in the book. For example, I wrapped up little presents for my son to open every hour or so. My daughter was a young toddler so it was non-stop nursing, bouncing, peekaboo, Cheerios, etc. etc. Plus I was providing toys and snacks to a child in front of us whose mother seemed totally unprepared for the flight.

At the end of the flight some people who had sat near us complimented us on how we'd managed the kids for so long.

[NMMNG]

15. Basically

I was eating out with some friends the other night and we were surrounded by families with kids (though most of them were over 10) and for once we could hardly tell there were kids in the place. The one younger kid behind me was a bit chatty, but the little boy sitting across from us was so polite and quiet that if we didn't see him there we wouldn't have known he was present. Before we left I actually complimented him on how well behaved he was.

Shortly before we left, however, we began to hear the sound of metal clanking on a table from the other side of the divider. It went on for several minutes before I finally stood up and looked over the divider to see :wtf: was going on. A boy of about 9 or so was repeatedly picking up his spoon and dropping it on the table while his mother sat there oblivious to the disturbance he was creating. I would have glared at her until she noticed me had she been facing in my direction. I just don't get how people can let their kids do that sort of stuff in public and not give a darn. :shrug:

[Cannikin]

23. dupe

[billyskank]

16. Because I'm British

We don't complain. :eyes:

[KitchenWitch]

17. I have confronted parents of obnoxious children

only to be told it is none of my fucking business how they raise their children.

Once, at one of my son's ballgames, a lovely child ran over my foot with his scooter. I stopped him and very sternly told him to stop. A few minutes later, his lovely mother came up and screamed at me, "How dare you tell my child what to do."

It sure is a different time than when I was growing up. If I stepped out of line, I could expect all the adults in my neighborhood to chastise me on the way home, where my parents were waiting, after the phone call from the neighbors telling them what mischief I had gotten myself into.

[tjwmason]

19. That is one of the big differences.

Once upon a time - even to an extent when I was a boy - the biggest threat that a misbehaving child could be given was "I'll tell your parents", now it's the children saying to those adults who correct them "I'll tell my parents".

[KitchenWitch]

20. Holy shit, you are right!

I have kids, and believe me, if they step out of line in public, we leave and deal with it in private. No need to bring others into our family drama.

[billyskank]

21. More than once my teacher mother has been told

by an obnoxious schoolchild, "I'm going to tell my dad about you and he'll come and beat you up."

Needless to say such a threat has never been followed up, but I am amazed at the parenting that brings up a youth to even say such a thing.

[LoZoccolo]

35. WINNER!

:thumbsup:

So true.

[fudge stripe cookays]

30. If a kid ran over MY foot with a scooter...

I'd be brought up on charges, as I have arthritis in my feet, and would explode from the pain!

fsc

[LoZoccolo]

34. People are like that with their dogs too.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l41MZ6gN62c

[JVS]

47. That's sooooo pathetic! She should be busted

[REP]

22. Oh, I Do

We avoid restaurants that have a children's menu and high chairs. If by some chance a child having a melt-down is seated near us, we ask to be reseated, and let the manager know why. Speaking to the parents is useless; they are aware their child is misbehaving and either don't care or think it's cute; if they were going to do something about it they would have taught their child how to behave before they left home.

Occasionally, the McDouchingtons of the world will let their child misbehave loudly because it sooooooo cyuuute. If I cannot get away from the noise, I ignore it. That seems to drive the McDouchingtons of the world mad; I can't tell you how many times I've heard that overly-loud "mommy voice" talk about "mean lady" who won't look at them. Good lord, woman - you're barely interested in the fruit of your loins - why should I be? Again, it's useless confronting the McDouchingtons - they do know better, but they don't care.

There seems to be a certain set of McDouchingtons that know their children will not behave properly in public and therefore drag their children to inappropriate venues to irritate people unaccompanied by children, and will even prompt their children to be disruptive. I think it's schadenfraude; I could be wrong, though. I'm fortunate in that I am rarely around the childed or the McDouchingtons.

[Cannikin]

24. Theatre management should come at the parents with theire flashlights

and ask them to be quiet. But they dont do that much anymore. Is it because we arent going to them and complaining?

[Ravenseye]

29. I think that's an interesting question

I recall in the old days usher's would pounce if you even put your feet up on the seat in front of you. Any disturbance they'd show up with flashlights.

Nowdays I can't recall the last time I saw anyone who worked for the theater past the ticket taker.

[asthmaticeog]

37. I think they just don't want to pay ushers. nt

[Cannikin]

26. That PG stands for Parental Guidance. If you cant give them guidance...

Take them to a G rated movie where they belong.

I think parents are used to hearing all the noise and forget (or dont care) what its like for those who dont have children.

[AccessGranted]

27. I Have No Problem Letting Them Have It

We went to the movies to see American Haunting, which stunk, and a bunch of kids (teenagers) were talking loud to each other and on cell phones and climbing over the seats. They were yelling at the screen also. I let it go for about 1 minute and I told them, "If you want to talk loud and act stupid go outside and do it. I paid my money and I'd like to watch and hear the movie whether you want to or not". I said it loud and with force. They shut up and the entire theatre applauded. I use to put up with crap....not anymore. When I turned 40 I figured I've lived long enough to say what the hell I want to say if I don't like something.

[progmom]

32. I did once.

At a baseball game. We had amazing seats - second row, behind the on-deck circle. There was a snotty little kid behind us who kept shouting racial slurs at all the Hispanic players. After the game went into extra innings, and he continued with his bullshit, I finally had enough. I turned around and said: "Isn't it past your bedtime yet, Winston?" (yes, in hindsight, this was probably not the best thing to say). Yeah - that didn't go over so well with his mom, but then she probably didn't think there was anything wrong with his behavior. :(

[swimboy]

39. I think what you said was pretty good!

I might have said, "I don't know who these people are that brought you to this game, but if your parents were here they sure ought to be mortified at your behavior."

:loveya:

[LoZoccolo]

36. And anyone who defends the kids or their parents in these threads...

...must be one of the obnoxious parents who let it happen and strike back when confronted as has been described a few times in this thread.

[HiFructosePronSyrup]

38. I did that once.

Some jerk mom brought her daughter's entire sleep over party to a nine o' clock showing of a movie. After about 15 minutes of disinterested little girls chatting away like it was a slumber party I went over to the mom and told her to keep the kids quite. She just sat there and pretended not to hear me. I was right next to her and she just sat there staring straight ahead. Half an hour later she just got up and left.

[Orsino]

40. And possibly we realize that...

...the parent having already committed to bringing the kid to the theater is unlikely to change his/her mind, no matter what is said--and in the meantime, even more of the movie experience will be lost to the discussion.

There is also the hope that the problem will solve itself, or that someone more irritated will shoulder the burden without our having to lift a finger.

Fear may not be a significant factor.

[LibDemAlways]

41. A year ago I posted a story on DU

about a horrible experience I had in a restaurant where a little kid screamed and threw plates and the mother did nothing.

I was mercilessly attacked by a contingent of DUers who told me I was the one with the problem and should have stayed home if I didn't like it.

It was refreshing to read the responses on this thread and to see that others believe they have rights in public places too. If a kid can't behave in a restaurant or theatre, he or she should be removed so as not to disturb the other patrons. Period. (Airplanes, are, of course, another matter, and I think most parents do the best they can in a difficult situation.)

[Oeditpus Rex]

44. Must've been in GD

where anything you post will be wrong and subject to attack.

"The sun rose in the east this morning."



"Why do you hate the west?"

"So you have something against rain? We NEED rain! Why don't you want it to rain?"

"WEATHERISM! FREEPER ALERT!"

:eyes:

[LibDemAlways]

46. Actually, it was in the lounge.

It's here:


http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_topic&forum=105&topic_id=2974971


I had some support, but was appalled that so many posters thought I had no right to a pleasant restaurant experience. I hope they are seated next to this kid or one like him the next time they dine out. Might change their tune in a hurry.

[JVS]

43. Because the parents are as worthless as their shitbag kids

[siouxsiecreamcheese]

45. half the reason i don't go to family related functions is this

don't get me wrong, i do like kids, the well behaved nice ones. but once in a while there are just groups of these obnoxious brats who think its thier world your intruding in. I just get so sick of being treated like a 2nd class citizen because I'm not a "mom". like my rights as an individual are thrown out the window once little emily or dakota show up. don't these parents ever think of what bad parents others think they are? I understand if your kids are uncontrolable and your doing all you can to shut them up or calm them down, but I just don't get the ones that sit there and do nothing like thier brats are perfect little angels.