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yvr girl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Apr-02-06 11:05 AM
Original message
How long would you search for a lost child?
Edited on Sun Apr-02-06 11:13 AM by yvr girl
I can't even imagine how hard it is to lose a child. I'm not a parent, so I can't say for sure how I'd feel. There's a case in BC that is 15 years old. The parents are still actively keeping the case alive. I just think that would keep the wound raw.
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ScreamingMeemie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Apr-02-06 11:06 AM
Response to Original message
1. Looking at my son as I type this...Until I drew my last breath. I would
Edited on Sun Apr-02-06 11:17 AM by MrsGrumpy
never give up if there was not concrete evidence of the death of my child. The bond between a parent and a child is very strong. I completely understand the parents still searching.

And, on edit, that's a wound that would never heal anyway. :(
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MaryBear Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Apr-02-06 12:34 PM
Response to Reply #1
21. Ditto.
The same goes for grandchildren.
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fight4my3sons Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Apr-02-06 12:38 PM
Response to Reply #1
22. me too.
I just couldn't imagine. It's one of my worst fears :-(
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laheina Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Apr-02-06 01:57 PM
Response to Reply #1
30. Amen.
The "what if" questions leave the wound just as raw and open.

As a parent, I would never stop looking.
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Blue Diadem Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Apr-02-06 11:09 AM
Response to Original message
2. Until they were found..one way or another
I can't begin to imagine what it would be like to not know where my child is..no matter how many years pass.
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NNadir Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Apr-02-06 11:11 AM
Response to Original message
3. Forever.
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Deja Q Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Apr-02-06 11:15 AM
Response to Original message
4. I've been trying to find myself for years.
Forgive me. I have no offspring and I have been referred to as an "adult child". Or at least "childlike" in some respects.

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gizmo1979 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Apr-02-06 11:16 AM
Response to Original message
5. Until the end of time!
I would never quit ever.
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CaliforniaPeggy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Apr-02-06 11:16 AM
Response to Original message
6. I would search forever, my dear yvr girl........
Because a child is a huge part of you.......

And to have him/her gone would be so incredibly painful........

The grief would be overwhelming, I think.....

So the act of searching would help alleviate that horrifying pain and grief.......

Forever, or until recovery or loss was proven.......:cry:
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merh Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Apr-02-06 11:19 AM
Response to Original message
7. Still looking for a nephew.
I will never stop.

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ScreamingMeemie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Apr-02-06 11:40 AM
Response to Reply #7
10. merh, I did not know that.
I'm so sorry. And I hope you find him. :hug:
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merh Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Apr-02-06 11:43 AM
Response to Reply #10
11. And I pray you find your son.
:hug:

thanks for being there for so many of us :loveya:

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ScreamingMeemie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Apr-02-06 11:45 AM
Response to Reply #11
12. My son is safe and sound, watching a movie...thank goodness.
I was just looking at him as I pondered my answer. I would die before I gave up looking for my child. :loveya:

I feel I could do so much more. Thank you for being a model of perserverance in the toughest of circumstances. :hug:
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merh Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Apr-02-06 12:03 PM
Response to Reply #12
16. Oh, I did misread your first post and now better understand
what you typed. :blush:

:hug: :loveya:
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supernova Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Apr-02-06 11:21 AM
Response to Original message
8. Forever, obviously
Well, maybe not for others, but for myself. I'd never stop looking. I'd always keep a place in my heart for his or her return. How could I not? It would be like severing a piece of myself. :shrug:

Yes, it does keep the wound raw, but I do believe there are some tragedies you never get over. Oh sure, you can go on with your life, other homes, other friends, other jobs, other children and spouses even. But losing a child, especially by violence or theft, that's something I don't think people are ever able to heal.
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Gormy Cuss Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Apr-02-06 11:30 AM
Response to Original message
9. I have a friend whose daughter ran away as a pre-teen.
Never gave up. Even after some well-meaning relatives tried to tell him the girl was probably dead or living a horrible life of addiction or prostitution. Even after a pschyic told his wife that the girl was dead. In his case, it had a happy ending because she did resurface in her mid-20s and was living a normal life, although I suspect there is much about her teen years that she chose not to share with her parents.
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lizziegrace Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Apr-02-06 11:46 AM
Response to Original message
13. Forever, no question n/t
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RetroLounge Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Apr-02-06 11:48 AM
Response to Original message
14. Until the end of the world
I would never stop...

RL
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Heidi Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Apr-02-06 11:48 AM
Response to Original message
15. I'm 43, and my biological father is _still_ looking for me.
I know it's a different set of circumstances, but my experience is that parents will look for their kids forever. Nothin' wrong with that, in my opinion. Those of us who've never lost a child can only speculate about what it's like and it's my opinion that we should, therefore, withhold judgment.
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miss_american_pie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Apr-02-06 12:13 PM
Response to Original message
17. Until I was put in the ground
and even then I'm not so sure.

A local family just got their daughter back after she was missing for ten years.
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dolo amber Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Apr-02-06 12:14 PM
Response to Original message
18. About 20 minutes
:wtf:
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yvr girl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Apr-02-06 12:16 PM
Response to Reply #18
19. What?
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Midlodemocrat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Apr-02-06 12:18 PM
Response to Original message
20. Until he/she was found in one way or another, or until I died.
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auntAgonist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Apr-02-06 12:41 PM
Response to Original message
23. I would never give up searching .., ever .. nt
Edited on Sun Apr-02-06 12:42 PM by auntAgonist
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Burma Jones Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Apr-02-06 01:03 PM
Response to Original message
24. Until.........
There was an episode of 6 Feet Under where a 6 year old was killed in an accidental shooting. There was some dialogue about how when you lose your parents, we call you an orphan and when you lose your spouse, we call you widow/widower, but when we lose a child we have no name for it. I think the character Brenda said something to the effect of, some things are too terrible to be named....
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Alleycat Donating Member (992 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Apr-02-06 01:09 PM
Response to Original message
25. Until I found out what happened.
I don't think you can be a parent and not feel this way.
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TheBaldyMan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Apr-02-06 01:10 PM
Response to Original message
26. about 30 seconds, but I hate kids
If I was a father I'd hope they had the good sense to run away from home by the time they were 14.
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LeftyMom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Apr-02-06 01:22 PM
Response to Original message
27. Always.
If I lived to be 100 and chances were good he'd have died of old age years before, I'd still look. I'm a mother, every cell in my body would demand no less of me.
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Maddy McCall Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Apr-02-06 01:23 PM
Response to Original message
28. Until the day I died. I'd never stop, at any cost.
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Maestro Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Apr-02-06 01:46 PM
Response to Original message
29. Until I find either my son or my daughter
alive or dead. Then I would never rest until the culprit(s) is (are) behind bars forever. Never quit. I completely understand.
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Nicole Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Apr-02-06 02:08 PM
Response to Original message
31. Until the day I died
I would never quit searching.
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