How Weird Is Florida? Enough To Fill Book After Book After Book

[matcom]

<snip>

TALLAHASSEE. Fla. -- How weird is Florida? So weird that not one, not two, but three different books have been titled "Weird Florida."

The first, written by Palm Beach Post reporter Eliot Kleinberg, hit stores in 1998 and detailed years of strange news stories. Charlie Carlson published his "Weird Florida" in 2005 documenting unusual sites around the state. Now Kleinberg is coming out with a "Weird Florida II" in January with more true, offbeat stories.

<snip>

A Jacksonville man, though, learned it's not a good idea to joke about dead pets. He taunted his wife over the loss of their dog. She took an ornamental sword from above the fireplace and stabbed him through his arm.

In another Jacksonville story, a robber swinging a samurai sword sent condiments flying at a restaurant before stealing $32 from diners.

A few dumb criminals made the news.

A man suspected of burglarizing a massage therapy business was arrested after he returned to the scene looking for his missing wallet. Two thieves stole an employee's car at a Pensacola-area gas station then returned an hour later to fill up. They were arrested.

An Ocala area man didn't think through a scheme to end his marriage. He showed his wife a Utah man's wallet and said it was a hitchhiker he picked up and murdered. After a massive search for the body, police learned that the billfold's owner was fine and the suspect confessed he made up the story to get his wife to leave him.

Now here's a tip for parents: If you ask your teenage son to help you steal a dishwasher and stove from the house next door, don't be surprised if he calls the police the next time you get in an argument. That happened in Palm Beach County.

Three teenagers were charged with kidnapping a 15-year-old boy and demanding $50 ransom be dropped off at a Fort Myers Taco Bell.

more...

http://www.wftv.com/irresistible/5759888/detail.html

[Clintmax]

1. You know...I bet if you looked at EVERY state...

there'd be weird things to report too. Not just Florida. :rofl:

[ragin_acadian]

3. sorry to disappoint. but florida is one f'd up state.

one in six florida elementary students have committed a felony.

and there is much, much, more.

go look at the southeren poverty law center website, we are near the top for hate groups, and other such things.


there are also essentially two florida's - one south, one north. i live in the north part.




.....it's just hard to explain, unless you live here or actively follow florida news.

[TallahasseeGrannie]

14. ONE IN SIX ELEMENTARY.....

dear God get me a link.

[ragin_acadian]

22. i originally saw the statistic in a Cagle "True" cartoon,

so it might be suspect, but i did find these with a little research:

"Florida juveniles are responsible for about one out of four violent crimes, while nearly 30 percent of juveniles arrested in Florida are female, according to the Florida Department of Juvenile Justice. As well, approximately 7,000 Florida juveniles end up in adult court each year, a rate 26 times higher than the national average.

And while Florida's violent juvenile crime rate was more than 50 percent higher than the national average a few years ago, recent statistics suggest that serious juvenile offenses are declining." http://www.iamforkids.org/newsdata/view_ind/2280

"Florida’s juvenile crime rate is down from 7,760 delinquency referrals per 100,000 juveniles in Fiscal Year 1994-95 to 6,750 delinquency referrals per 100,000 juveniles in FY 1999-00.

In Fiscal Year 1999-2000, 104,176 juveniles were referred for delinquency. They were charged with committing 150,747 crimes. In that year, judges sentenced 12,028 juvenile offenders to long-term delinquency programs. The number of Florida juveniles referred for delinquency peaked in FY 1997-98 at 108,382; they were responsible that year for 175,103 crimes. There were 9,952 juveniles committed that year by a judge to a delinquency treatment program." - okay, that's the statistic, but then: "14 percent of juvenile offenders can be classified as chronic offenders, responsible overall for 42 percent of delinquency referrals and 67 percent of repeat referrals. Chronic offenders typically had six or more delinquency referrals (similar to arrests in the adult system) over a two-year period.

Recidivism among juvenile offenders in Florida is down. The percentage of juveniles staying out of trouble for a year after release from a delinquency treatment program has improved from 54 percent in 1996 to 58 percent in 1998."

A 4 percent decline in recidivism among delinquents prevents an estimated 131 assaults, 100 burglaries, 77 auto thefts, 34 robberies, 4 rapes and 10 murders over a five-year period. 58 percent of juvenile delinquents never come back a second time into the justice system.

A 26 percent surge in Florida’s population of 10 to 17-year-olds occurred during the 1990s. The state’s total increase of youth during that decade was 300,000.

A 10 percent increase in 10- to 17-year-olds is anticipated from 2000 through 2009 in Florida. The state’s current population of 10- to 17-year-olds is approximately 1.5 million." http://www.djj.state.fl.us/Research/statsnresearch/keytrends.html

i'll try to do some math on this tomorrow, when i'm not fuzzy from beer - keep in mind also, the number of people that move in and out of state every day.

[RagingInMiami]

29. Back your facts up before you talk out of your ass

I live in the southern part, and even down here, where it's supposedly so violent, it's not so bad where almost seventeen percent of elementary kids have committed felonies.

[ragin_acadian]

31. try and carry out a civilized discussion before you post as an ass.

btw, i don't know that the southern part of the state is so violent, i looked the '99 report for hate crimes at: http://myfloridalegal.com/99hate.PDF and found it interesting that the only counties that classified hate crimes as hate crimes were in the south part of the state, which should give you some indication of how criminal motivation is classified in the north part of the state (as in: it is not)


how did you arrive at 17 percent?

[RagingInMiami]

32. One out of six is 16.66 percent

I said that it is not so bad where almost 17 percent of elementary kids have felonies. We're talking kids eleven years and younger. That's an absurd stat.

[ragin_acadian]

33. i looked for the information, and couldn't find it.

even on the site where it was originally (cagle.slate.msn.com), and it was touted as "true" - so i admit that i posted out of my ass, without verifying it first. and you are right, 11 years or younger is pretty absurd, i'm thinking that high school would probably be more likely.

the 1/6th or 17 percent didn't even occur to me. math major that i am not.

but you have to admit, FL does set the bar, north or south, on the abnormal, and is nothing like the television commercials portray it.

[RagingInMiami]

35. As far as Miami goes

Things were much worse in the 1980s. It's almost normal now. Almost.

Here's to North Florida.

:toast:

[ragin_acadian]

38. good to hear!

at least you can boast Miami Vice, CSI, Carl Hiassen, and Flamingos, among other things - :rofl:

North Florida has: DGIECJV (S&L/Tops'l Hill/Mafia/Bush Cartel) scandal, the occasional DUI on a lawn tractor, survivor: meth, domestic violence aplenty, and "your kid has eleven fingers because St. Joe had a paper mill"

so here's to South Florida, and the directors cut of Scarface! :pals:

or Florida as a whole, the land of milk and lawyers :toast:

any chance on you making it up to Wakullah, or Manatee springs?

[RagingInMiami]

39. North Florida has

Lynyrd Skynryd (The original band, not the copycats).

St. Augustine - The oldest established city in the United States.

Jacksonville - The largest geographical city in the United States.

Tom Petty (Born in Gainesville)

The World's Largest Outdoor Cocktail Party.

The Redneck Riviera (at least we have a riviera)

The Daytona 500 (if you're into that)

Wild spring break parties (we also have that ):)

And Jeb Bush (We also have him ) :-(


I have no plans on driving up there anytime soon.

[RagingInMiami]

41. And you also have Cape Kennedy!

[ragin_acadian]

42. i bow,

yes, anyone who knows that Skynyrd was all Florida deserves respect.

the riviera: the only difference between it and the real one.....is everything.

i used to panhandle on St. George street in St. Augustine. fun place. if you don't mind the carpets rolling up at 5 pm.

as for Jebbles, i've met him twice. scarier than his brother - he's the type that can hide the fact that he is a sociopath.

but did not know about: Petty, Jacksonville, or
"The World's Largest Outdoor Cocktail Party" - i must hear details.

ever read any Tim Dorsey?

[RagingInMiami]

44. I've always been a huge LS fan

The world's Largest Outdoor Cocktail Party is the annual college football game between the Florida Gators and the Georgia Bulldogs, played every year in Jacksonville.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_World's_Largest_Outdoor_Cocktail_Party

I've never read Tim Dorsey. What does he write about?

[ragin_acadian]

45. I'm a Skynyrd fan too,

but just the early stuff, the endangered species album kinda killed it for me. driving home, west, from sausagesteen (st. augustine), i always used to listen to 'swamp song' - always made me sad. seems like they have a song for everything.

Dorsey is like Hiassen - , except the main character is a sociopath-gone-off-his-meds FL history buff named Serge: more off the wall than Hiassen. Kills hookers with cans of fixAflat, carves bumpersticker slogans into the chests of his victims (but they deserved it), taxidermies mafia guys alive inside taxidermied sharks, etc. look for mentions of the Florabama, and whatnot.

good god. that Wikipedia article didn't mention anything overtly naughty, is it worse than FSU-UWF?

[RagingInMiami]

46. The old Skynyrd is the only Skynyrd

My favorites are "Things Goin' On", "Curtis Lowe", "Mr. Banker" and, of course, "Simple Man", "Tuesdays Gone", "Gimme Three Steps" and "Sweet Home Alabama."

If you like Carl Hiaasen, you will probably like James W. Hall. He is darker than Hiaasen.

And he was a professor of mine in a creative writing class I took at FIU.

www.jameswhall.com

[graywarrior]

2. Plus Kaherine Harris lives here.

[underpants]

4. Some people say that Florida can't count well they say...

if you don't like it then you can just turn around and go back to one of the 52 states that you came from. So there.

[Mrs.Matcom]

5. That settles it...

we are never moving there!!! Talk about stupid idiots! Yikes! :*

[matcom]

6. ACK!

but its a BLIZZARD outside? x(

[Mrs.Matcom]

7. Tough,

you blew it. Now go shovel! :spank:

[matcom]

9. you're NEVER getting a greyhound now!

DAMMIT! x(

[Mrs.Matcom]

10. I don't want one,

I am going to buy myself another pug! :P

[matcom]

12. not until we live in Florida you aren't!

i FORBID you!

:hide:

[GOPisEvil]

18. No blizzards here!

Sunny and warm...AGAIN!!

Liberal here, too. ;)

[Taverner]

8. Well take the die hard blue staters, corner them off in the tip

of a die hard red state....and see what happens.

Watch the hilarity ensue!

[Initech]

11. This bit was absolutely hilarious:

"And in a rather unusual Tampa area traffic stop, a practical joker put a blue-and-red flashing light on a car dashboard. He stopped laughing, though, after two men he pulled over turned out to be undercover officers. The said they found 7 grams of cocaine alongside the flashing light."

:rofl:

[SlavesandBulldozers]

13. Florida is a freakshow.

we need a central florida du meetup btw.

[TallahasseeGrannie]

16. AND WE LIKE IT THAT WAY!

[SlavesandBulldozers]

17. i love when DU'ers do the whole "omfg Florida" thing. it's hilarious.

cause it's true. I would never feel compelled to defend Florida to anybody.

[TallahasseeGrannie]

19. I study genealogy extensively

and many of my ancestors founded Bay and Jackson County. Lest that get me a swelled head and visions of the DAR or Daughters of the Confederacy, I once read that the only people who were in Florida after the Civil War were the ones wanted by the law elsewhere.

It has kinda stuck, I guess.

[lpbk2713]

20. Let's wait till around April or so to have a meetup.

It should be a lot safer to drive then.

[ragin_acadian]

23. indeed!

i'm up in the panhandle, and there are one or two other DU'ers in my area -

how's a north central du meetup sound?

wakullah springs?

[SlavesandBulldozers]

28. wakullah springs?

good one! ;)

[ragin_acadian]

34. how 'bout manatee springs?

i went there once. pickled my liver, paved my lungs.

fun time, expecially when i got to see an actual manatee!

[SlavesandBulldozers]

49. manatee springs or wakullah springs, certainly

those are really the two major hubs in Florida, after all. ;)

[Medium Baby Jesus]

24. Let me know when you organize one.

I'll be there.

[SlavesandBulldozers]

27. i certainly will

love the name btw.

[skygazer]

15. My father lives in Florida

That right there makes it a wierd place. :silly:

[RockaFowler]

21. This proves my point - Everything happens in Florida

We are so messed up here in Florida it is incredible. I knew someone who moved after he found out that A Current Affar wasn't a local show. Back in the 90's every story on that show was about Florida. He thought that it was one of those Florida Tabloid shows until he found out that they were filmed in New York. I love living in Blue Palm Beach County (up to a point - I can't afford housing here), but I am scared about the area where my mom lives (the Western Panhandle). That place is scary. Two words for you - Scarborough Country

[ForrestGump]

25. Florida is FUBAR, and has been for decades

I knew someone who has been traveling there very year since 1961 (his sister lives there) and he told me once that seeing it over that period of time is like watching a beautiful girl dying of some incurable disease. Environmentally, it's a total disaster. In every other way, too, almost. Even now that the whole '80s Columbian drug war and Cuban jailbird problems have subsided in the Miami area.

I've traveled all over Florida, and I love parts of it (the Keys perhaps more than most, though they're not only not like part of FL but are not like part of the US, for that matter), but it is one messed up state.

[El Fuego]

26. OK, I'm feeling really picked on here.

:(

But all the things in the article, this is just everyday "local news" for us!

[RagingInMiami]

30. Keeps things interesting

Happy New Year, neighbor!

:toast: :toast:

[dryan]

36. My 2 cents...

most of the folks in Florida are from somewhere else.

[RagingInMiami]

37. That's true

I'm a rare breed because I was born and raised here.

[El Fuego]

48. Me too

Especially rare in South Florida.

[El Fuego]

47. That it does!

Never a dull moment in these parts...

Happy New Year to you! :party:

[amerikat]

40. check out weird NJ. too.

Weird New Jersey started as a little zine and has become an empire of weirdness.


http://weirdnj.com/

[Montauk6]

43. GERMANY OR FLORIDA?

(shout-out to the Loveline listeners here)