Flirting.

[Strong Atheist]

Specifically, flirting on the internet. More specifically, flirting here on D.U. Most specifically: flirting in the lounge.

AM I THE ONLY ONE CONFUSED?

In real life, I have not flirted much. I am quiet and introverted (Myers/Briggs INFP), and my relationships have all VERY quickly fallen into something serious, so flirting has not come into play much.

On the internet, things are different. People feel more free to argue, and use language that they might not in person (I think due to anonymity/not being face to face with the other person). It can also be easier for us introverts to socialize; EVERYONE is at somewhat of a social-cues disadvantage.

Here in the lounge, though .... I have been trying in my own way to fit in, posting my earworms and joking around. MAYBE occasionally straying from the completely innocent :evilgrin: , but I knew where MY limits were, and thought they were reasonable. So there I am, posting and enjoying things, when ; suddenly some posts go wildly off on tangents and get totally out of control (other people, of course, have different ideas of where "limits" are :evilgrin:), and suddenly ..... things SEEM to be getting more complicated than I intended for them to be.

Don't misunderstand me, flirting is fun, if no one is hurt :evilfrown: . I am not worried about being hurt, I don't think it will happen and if it does, I am tough, I can take it!:evilgrin:

I just don't want anyone ELSE to get hurt. :evilfrown:

So ....

I guess ...

I THINK ...

is casual flirting o.k.? We are all just having fun, right?:evilfrown:

[supernova]

1. Are you

taking someone seriously? Is she/he taking you seriously?

[Strong Atheist]

4. I don't know

about someone taking me seriously. I THINK some flirting was going on (I am terrible at social clues). It was fun, and I could continue. I can't say I am taking anyone SERIOUSLY, it is way too early for that kind of thing ...

[supernova]

5. My suggestion

would be to work it out over PMs. You won't know unless you ask.

[Strong Atheist]

28. Thanks. I was not/ am not looking for

serious stuff. I just thought I detected flirting, and it was unexpected. I had not INTENDED for things to go in that direction, but after looking at some of the posts on this thread (some more than others), I think I can relax, and enjoy the exchanges, if they occur ...

[flvegan]

2. I never flirt, so I have no idea.

*snort*

It seems okay to me, though.

[Strong Atheist]

7. Thanks! If I get enough positive support, I may continue.

Of course, the other party(ies) may not see it that way, which is ok too. I back off quickly, when needed.

[ForrestGump]

3. I am afraid I can't help you, because I know not of this 'flirting' that

you mention. Please let me know if you see any, that I might begin to understand the concept.







You come here often?

[supernova]

9. Listen to the Chief Lounge Flirt!

Forrest, you so need a :spank: :spank: :spank: :spank:

[ForrestGump]

17. M'lady, you wound me!

A little more to the left...there you go...

[supernova]

36. Let me change first,

There, that's better!

[ForrestGump]

41. Uh-oh. The PVC. She's serious.

:scared:

[Strong Atheist]

10. As helpful as all the rest of your

posts to me have been.:eyes:

Thanks.

[ForrestGump]

19. Thank you

I aim to please.

[RevCheesehead]

20. ....

:rofl:


Elvest Gumpley, LIAR. :evilgrin:

[ForrestGump]

34. Liar? Liar?!

Well....okay. I can see that.

But can we settle on 'equivocator,' at least? :D

[RevCheesehead]

37. Nah, I saw your pants on fire.

But since they were 75% off, I figured you knew what you were doing. :P

[ForrestGump]

43. Well, you know, that's just a HINT as to how hot I am

Either that or it's a HINT that I ate chili the night before....

[RevCheesehead]

46. AND Brussel Sprouts.

I'm telling Santa to get you BEANO for Christmas.



You will thank me later. I'm sure others will, too.

[LeftyMom]

6. Nobody flirts in the lounge

You must be misinterpreting the situation.



















;)

[Strong Atheist]

11. Wouldn't be

the first time in my life ...:evilfrown:

[LeftyMom]

14. I'm teasing.

Sorry all of us shameless lounge flirts are bing silly on your thread- it's what we do.

I hope you're not misinterpreting and something comes of it if that's what you're looking for, or you just have some fun if you prefer.

[Strong Atheist]

15. I knew you were kidding.

I guess I would just be having fun. I was not LOOKING for anything; some threads just went ..... out of control ...

[LeftyMom]

21. It happens

:) Have lots of fun.

[Strong Atheist]

24. Ok! nt.

[LeftPeopleFinishFirst]

33. Yeah, really, who does that?

:evilgrin:

[LeftyMom]

45. Certainly not me

(or, for that matter, any of the other esteemed posters on this thread.)

[Guava Jelly]

8. flirting on the net is ok to me

people in everyday life often get avoided and feel unspecial...
but a random flirt from a perfect stranger sometimes has a medicinal effect on the lonely or bored soul

[Guava Jelly]

12. and lately I could use a good flirt

sometimes life kicks you in the balls.
and a kind word from a stranger is better then morphine

[Strong Atheist]

13. Thanks! Will see how the other

party(ies) respond as future opportunities come up!

[RevCheesehead]

16. From one INFP to another....

I've always told people that stuff in the lounge needs to be taken with a shaker of salt. It's a place to relax, to get to know the fun side of people, and enjoy flirtations.

Do I flirt? Duh... if you don't know the answer to that, then you haven't been reading my posts. ;) Do I expect a relationship to come from it? Well, that's a different matter, isn't it?

One has to be practical and grounded in reality. If you live more than 100 miles away, you probably aren't ever going to meet, unless you have a reason to connect. If one of the two is married, um, sorry, but you're probably not going to get a relationship out of it. Perhaps sex, but not a long-term relationship. Also, when you meet someone in person, it can be a tad disconcerting (and even disappointing) if the person is not what you imagined.

I think it's a good idea to clarify intentions, via PM or e-mail. Just be up front, be yourself, and have a good time.

O8)

[Strong Atheist]

22. Ah, thank you.

Um ... now that it may have come up unexpectedly, I am just out to have fun (ROWRRRR!):blush:

[supernova]

26. What she said,

Great advice, Rev. :thumbsup:

And I'm an INTJ, btw. I tend to also take people seriously. Took me a long time to lighten up.

[RevCheesehead]

32. Ah, that subtle difference....

J or P. I am so into reading other people, it's scary at times. And I rarely draw conclusions, especially when relying on the written word.

But yeah, we "NF"s need to stick together. We apparently make up only about 3% of the population.

[Strong Atheist]

53. A non-conformist, as usual.

(Me, I mean, not you)

[xmas74]

65. INFJ here

but I'm pretty good at flirting and not taking it seriously. Everything else in life I take pretty seriously.

[CBHagman]

84. Another INFP here.

We get an amazing number of INFPs and atheists here, no matter what the statisticians tell us, huh?

I wish they'd covered flirting in graduate school...or perhaps even parochial school. :blush:

[Strong Atheist]

86. Schools don't teach some of the more

important things, much of the time. I know, I am a teacher ...

[Strong Atheist]

52. Oh, I just miss

social cues, sometimes, and sometimes can not tell how serious/silly some things are. I just don't want anyone hurt, but it is cool now.

[RevCheesehead]

27. all is cool.

(I knew, and didn't take it as such.) :pals:

[Strong Atheist]

30. Um ....

dang!

:blush: :blush: :blush: :blush: :blush: :blush: :blush:

[Oeditpus Rex]

29. 'Clarify intentions'

I've done that a time or two — though I was never sure it was the wisest move, nor that it was well-received.

OTOH, I took someone's flirtation seriously not long ago, and when I realized it was just recreational flirting, it stung a bit.

But that's because I am EEdiot. :banghead:

Well... and because she's really, really good at it.

My mantra: "Oh, lord, please don't let me be misunderstood."

[RevCheesehead]

35. I never said "all" flirting.

You should know better.
:loveya:

[Oeditpus Rex]

42. There's no such thing as 'all'

Or, better put...

No generalization is worth a damn — including this one.
— Oliver Wendell Holmes

[RevCheesehead]

47. There's also no such thing as "nothing."

:hug::loveya:

[Oeditpus Rex]

48. You haven't seen my bank statement

Or the New Fall Teevee Lineup.

[RevCheesehead]

51. Yeah?

Well I was talking about something that matters. :P

[Oeditpus Rex]

56. Oh

Well, then, in some areas my cup runneth over. :hug:

In others, the sumbitch is cracked and the handle fell off. :grr:

That's life, 'ey?

[RevCheesehead]

58. I have an old B&W TV I can send you.

My cups runneth over, but in ways vastly different from yours. ;)

[Oeditpus Rex]

59. Perhaps you need bigger cups?

I don't understand the "Is the glass half full or half empty" bit. Far as I'm concerned, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.

Pragmatism, dammit! :thumbsup:

[RevCheesehead]

64. While that might go without saying,

getting anything bigger would involve customizing, and that can be a tad pricey.

Think Geraldine here. ;)

[Oeditpus Rex]

68. Geraldine?

Flip Wilson in drag? :shrug:



I assume you don't mean my Aunt Geri, who's a mere wisp of a thang.

[RevCheesehead]

69. The ONLY Geraldine, dear.

[Oeditpus Rex]

70. *waps forehead*

I haven't learned to think of her as "Geraldine." She's just "The Vicar of Dibley" to me. :silly:

And, yes... I seem to recall she once uttered the unforgetful words "massive bosom."

:wow:

[RevCheesehead]

80. Remember the first episode?

"My God ... you're a woman!"
"Oh, you noticed that, eh? (pointing at boobs) These are such a damned give-away!"

[Strong Atheist]

38. I sympathize.

:pals:

Rejection is hard, but there is always the next day. I know, I have been there. Hang in there!

[Porcupine]

62. Well that explains why you make sense to me.

I'm also of that odd little corner of the personality world.

[RevCheesehead]

83. Not odd...

we are "unique." Or "special."
We see the world differently, and the world is better for it. :hug:

[DS1]

18. GIve me ten dollars and I'll love you forever

:D

[ForrestGump]

23. I'll undercut him!...oh, wait a minute...wrong thread

:blush:

It's true: he love you long time.

[DS1]

25. I'll uppercut you, buster

[ForrestGump]

31. Oh yeah?! Well, I'll

Run away! Run away!

[LeftPeopleFinishFirst]

39. Flirting?

Nobody does that here, do they?






...

[Strong Atheist]

40. Thanks all (or all but one

x( ) I have to go to dinner with the relatives, back in an hour!

[ForrestGump]

44. Stop flirting with me!

:P

[Strong Atheist]

49. YOU!

x( :spank: :spank: :spank: x(

[WCGreen]

50. I am nice to people and if I see they appreciate

humor, I start to "flirt"....

Now I do this in real life as well as cyber life...

It's fun... It connects us to people on a fleeting intimate level... and makes people feel good, if just for a moment...

[CaliforniaPeggy]

54. Casual flirting is fun, and nearly everyone here does it.....

I think what the good Rev has to say on the subject is also worth reading and heeding.....


:hi:

[Strong Atheist]

55. Um yes.

I agree...:blush:

[CaliforniaPeggy]

57. I am confused by your response.....

Please check your PM......

:pals:

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

60. Two months ago I would have answered this differently

Now all I can say is....don't do things you KNOW are wrong.

[RevCheesehead]

67. funny thing about experience..

after time passes, we can learn to be grateful, not for the pain, but for the lessons learned. And for surviving it.

:hug:

[LaurenG]

61. No man this is series!1!!11!!!

I really must have missed something but here - .

[MrScorpio]

63. I am in real life as I am on the Internet

But, I'm just a hands on kind of guy

[xmas74]

66. there is flirting involved tonight and I'm not involved?

Why didn't I get a memo?

[djeseru]

71. Being neither witty nor intellectual...

...I just use my lurker status to watch everyone else flirt...

:P

[GOPisEvil]

72. Wait...I sensed wittiness there.

And witty means smart.

So, I uh, hmmm...:dunce:

[djeseru]

73. Er, ummm....

:D

I'm busted...

[GOPisEvil]

75. This hurts me more than it will hurt you.

:spank:

[djeseru]

78. Well, somtimes you gotta get tough.

You know how those intellectual-types are...such smart-asses...

[GOPisEvil]

79. Better a smart-ass than a dumb-ass.

Better also to be pissed-off than pissed-on.

[Strong Atheist]

74. A "Being There"

type of thing ....

[djeseru]

76. Better than soap operas.

The writing and humor is so much more interesting.

[Strong Atheist]

77. So glad

I (we) could be of service ...

[djeseru]

81. This has been a huge learning experience.

It hasn't been easy for me to get back into the world and the Lounge has been helping me re-learn how to talk to people again...so, yes, I do owe not just you, but all of you, a big thank you.

I only wish I could stay and hang out longer...

[Strong Atheist]

82. ?

I am, as usual, completely lost, but thats ok. Good night!

[dpbrown]

85. My goal in life is to become a notorious lounge flirt

:evilgrin:

At the same time, I have to avoid Lydia Leftcoast at all times.

:scared:

And then I have to figure out what to do with the boxes....oh the boxes...

:bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox: :bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox::bluebox: :redbox: :graybox: