Dear Abby and Parental Notification for underage pregnant girls

[LynneSin]

Damn, this was a great letter not only from someone who works for Planned Parenthood BUT from Dear Abby herself. This will get the fundie's undies all in a tither

http://www.delawareonline.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20051007/LIFE01/510070326/1088

Honesty can backfire

From time to time, you tell young women who think they might be pregnant and are afraid to tell their parents, to do so. I usually do not write letters like this, but I need to express my personal experience. I am a minister. Several years ago, I worked for Planned Parenthood and we had a young girl, about 13, test positive for pregnancy. We urged her to tell her parents, but she kept refusing, insisting, "Dad will kill me!"

Of course, we knew better, and finally convinced her that the best thing was to tell her parents, have the baby, and get on with her life.

Her father beat her so badly that she was in the hospital for more than a month. She lost the baby because of the beating and ended up in foster care.

I will never again tell a young person that her parents will not go crazy, and I don't think you should do that either. Thanks, Abby. I enjoy your column.

Regretful in Florida

Thank you for the warning. Even though we wish all teenagers could disclose to their parents, as your letter illustrates, it is a sad reality that some of them cannot. And we, who care about young people, have to first be concerned with their safety. Although most young girls do involve their families, there will always be some who are unable to do so.

For that reason, I do not believe that parental notification should be mandated by law. And because sex education is no longer taught in as many states as it had been before, I strongly urge parents to begin talking to their children early about the facts of life and their personal value systems in order to create a safe and comfortable environment should a crisis occur

[Tallison]

1. Great letter and response

especially considering the number of conservatives likely to read Dear Abby.

The new Abby is the original's daughter, if I'm not mistaken. I've noticed a progressive shift in the tone of the column since the transition.

Ask Amy is a new feature in the Washington Post that's pretty consistently supportive of and critically minded about women's issues.

[China_cat]

2. And that doesn't even address the fact

that, in a number of cases, the person they want the girl to get permission from is the same one who impregnated her.

[Tallison]

3. Wonder if that was said "father"'s motive

in beating his daughter into a miscarriage?

[China_cat]

4. More than likely

although she'd probably have been permitted to carry to term if it hadn't gotten outside the family that she was pregnant.

I used to work with pregnant teens (and younger). We had one little girl who was 10 when she was impregnated by her uncle...11 when she delivered. Her mother told her she got that way from STANDING too close to a boy. It wasn't until counseling sessions that she even found out what sex was and the full story came out.

Not only was she made to carry the pregnancy, but she wasn't even allowed to think about releasing for adoption. Her family was adamant that she had to keep the baby as a permanent reminder of HER 'sin'.

Mandatory parental notification/permission is, simply, the impetus for more dumpster babies...not all of them newborn.

[LynneSin]

5. Delaware got stuck with parental notification but...

...they also worked with Planned Parenthood to write into the laws the rules for getting around it. From what I was told just stopping in a judges office and stating that it would be impossible to tell the parent can get you out of the notification.

It's a shame we have the law but at least the girls have an alternative that isn't that paintaking to get around it.

[China_cat]

7. You're lucky

most places that give a court alternative require a full hearing in the court room and can take anywhere from 2 weeks to a month to get on the schedule, taking the girl out of the time when she CAN have the abortion.

[Southpaw Bookworm]

8. Another problem

That's been arising in some states is that the judge with responsibility to conduct these hearings is refusing to do so, thus leaving the girl with no recourse.

[Shell Beau]

6. Wow! Well I think that

most teens should involve their parents in their decisions, but this goes to show that some teens mean it when they say they will get a beating. What a sad story but a real eye opener.

[Rabrrrrrr]

9. I bet the dad was a Super Christian, too

Asshole.

Wouldn't surprise if he was the father of the baby, either. Good ol' Republican Brand Christianity at its best.