Have a problem? Let me give you advice which won't help.
AngryAmish
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Wed Aug-10-05 11:41 AM
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Have a problem? Let me give you advice which won't help.
Either the advice will have nothing to do with your problem OR it would probably make your problems worse.
Rising Phoenix
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Wed Aug-10-05 11:42 AM
Response to Original message
1. I apparently can't count
AngryAmish
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Wed Aug-10-05 11:43 AM
Response to Reply #1
2. This is easily solved.
For example, you do not need to balance your checkbook. As long as you have checks you have money in your checking account. Problem solved!
Rising Phoenix
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Wed Aug-10-05 11:45 AM
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hickman1937
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Wed Aug-10-05 11:52 AM
Response to Original message
4. I was out of coffee for two days.
I bought some last night. In attempt to bring my system back into balance I drank 2 pots this morning and now my entire body is vibrating. What now?
AngryAmish
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Wed Aug-10-05 11:57 AM
Original message
It seems that you need some sort of stimulant
The lack of coffee has caused you to become resistant to caffeine. Your body is trying to humm you to sleep, like a massage chair. Try taking three or four No-Doz. Or some mini-thins.
lildreamer316
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Wed Aug-10-05 11:52 AM
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AngryAmish
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Wed Aug-10-05 11:56 AM
Response to Reply #5
6. Don't hook with a hooker.
lildreamer316
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Wed Aug-10-05 11:57 AM
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Ron Mexico
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Wed Aug-10-05 11:57 AM
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7. Can't get the unattainable office girl out of my mind.
Not a chance in hell because she's a newlywed, but I can't go ten mimutes without thinking some really impure thoughts about her. Distract me.
AngryAmish
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Wed Aug-10-05 12:00 PM
Response to Reply #7
Go find a homosexual. They seem interested in "turning" straight people gay. As them how to become gay.
KitchenWitch
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Wed Aug-10-05 01:16 PM
Response to Reply #9
13. I have heard they are giving toaster ovens to new converts
:silly: Me? I am holding out for the big screen TV.
no name no slogan
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Wed Aug-10-05 01:53 PM
Response to Reply #13
she "turned" two guys before she met me. she was engaged to one of 'em, and he came out three months before the wedding. i bet she was working on me, because she really likes toaster ovens. how many do you have to "turn" to get the TV? :silly:
KitchenWitch
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Thu Aug-11-05 12:26 AM
Response to Reply #15
21. Nope, not your ex wife!
Only married once (and still married) :rofl:
Texasgal
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Wed Aug-10-05 12:44 PM
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10. I just ate a large fry
from Mcdonalds... I fear I wil get sick. What to do?
AngryAmish
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Wed Aug-10-05 12:49 PM
Response to Reply #10
They will fight each other and leave you alone.
leftofthedial
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Wed Aug-10-05 01:10 PM
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AngryAmish
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Wed Aug-10-05 01:47 PM
Response to Reply #12
14. Find a business owner
Edited on Wed Aug-10-05 01:47 PM by AngryAmish
Walk up to him and say "I need a job. Bad." Then punch that motherfucker in the head.
leftofthedial
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Thu Aug-11-05 12:28 AM
Response to Reply #14
22. can I do it without talking to him first?
Liberalynn
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Wed Aug-10-05 01:54 PM
Response to Original message
16. It hasn't rained in days
the garden is dying, the hose won't reach, and I don't feel like lugging water cause it is too dang hot. I'm tempted to just let the garden croak but I spent money on the plants and it seems like such a waste. What should I do?
AngryAmish
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Wed Aug-10-05 03:07 PM
Response to Reply #16
17. You need a layer of protection to hold the water in
cover the garden with a large tarp, some clear plastic sheeting or a few feet of soil.
Nikia
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Wed Aug-10-05 03:35 PM
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18. I am leading my eating disorder support group tonight
It is made up mostly of anorexics and bulimics. What should I talk about? (Please don't be too offensive.)
AngryAmish
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Wed Aug-10-05 03:46 PM
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Nikia
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Wed Aug-10-05 03:52 PM
Response to Reply #19
I think that some of them might be though if that's what I talked about.
BlueIris
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Thu Aug-11-05 12:28 AM
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23. I can't get over the pain of a bad relationship.
Members of this web community are helping, my new therapist is...sort of helping, my desire to beat the crap out of my ex is...not helping.
BlueIris
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Thu Aug-11-05 12:32 AM
Response to Reply #23
24. Aren't you going to give me crappy advice?
It's okay if you're flippant--the ultra-serious approach isn't really working at the moment.
BlueIris
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Thu Aug-11-05 12:37 AM
Response to Reply #24
25. I'm not special enough for crappy advice, is that it?
Come on. All the other people got advice.
AngryAmish
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Thu Aug-11-05 11:53 AM
Response to Reply #23
I go out. I have to work away from the computer. Anyway, the way to get over the pain of a bad relationship is to make repeated drunked phone calls in the middle of the night to your ex. If he/she will not pick up the phone, start calling their relatives. Next step is to sit outside of their work all the time.
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