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A Reading from the Book of Armaments, Chapter 4, Verses 16 to 20

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XNASA Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-15-05 12:32 PM
Original message
A Reading from the Book of Armaments, Chapter 4, Verses 16 to 20
"Then did he raise on high the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch, saying, "Bless this, O Lord, that with it thou mayest blow thine enemies to tiny bits, in thy mercy." And the people did rejoice and did feast upon the lambs and toads and tree-sloths and fruit-bats and orangutans and breakfast cereals ... Now did the Lord say, "First thou pullest the Holy Pin. Then thou must count to three. Three shall be the number of the counting and the number of the counting shall be three. Four shalt thou not count, neither shalt thou count two, excepting that thou then proceedeth to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the number of the counting, be reached, then lobbest thou the Holy Hand Grenade in the direction of thine foe, who, being naughty in my sight, shall snuff it."





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madrchsod Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-15-05 12:36 PM
Response to Original message
1. heat getting to you there in the big city?
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Zuni Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-15-05 12:39 PM
Response to Original message
2. my favorite part of the Holy Grail
sjit always has me in stitches
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asthmaticeog Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-15-05 12:40 PM
Response to Reply #2
3. Enthusiastically seconded! Except I'd spell "shit" correctly.
:P
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Zuni Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-15-05 12:43 PM
Response to Reply #3
7. damn you
always pointing out my imperfections :cry:
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asthmaticeog Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-15-05 12:48 PM
Response to Reply #7
8. .
:evilgrin:
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Commie Pinko Dirtbag Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-15-05 12:50 PM
Response to Reply #7
10. He's not the olly one:
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kedrys Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-15-05 12:41 PM
Response to Reply #2
4. Pie Iesu Domine *thunk*
Dona Eis Requiem *thunk*

:rofl:
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Tyler Durden Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-15-05 02:14 PM
Response to Reply #4
12. followed immediately by the person beating a rug with a cat.
"WRAAAYR!"
"WRAAAYR!"
"WRAAAYR!"
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Ladyhawk Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-15-05 12:42 PM
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5. My favorite part, too.
I always lose it upon the recitation of the contents of the feast. :) It just gets funnier from there.
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johnnie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-15-05 12:43 PM
Response to Original message
6.  Oh. Oh, I see. Running away, eh?
You yellow bastards! Come back here and take what's coming to you. I'll bite your legs off!

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XNASA Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-15-05 12:49 PM
Response to Original message
9. The Ballad of Brave Sir Robin
"Bravely bold Sir Robin rode forth from Camelot
He was not afraid to die, oh, brave Sir Robin
He was not at all afraid to be killed in nasty ways
Brave, brave, brave, brave Sir Robin
He was not in the list bit scared to be smashed into a pulp
Or to have his eyes gouged out, and his elbows broken
To have his kneecaps split, and his body burned away
And his limbs all hacked and mangled, brave Sir Robin
His head smashed in, and his heart cut out,
And his liver removed, and his bowels unplugged,
And his nostrils raped, and his bottom burned off,
And his penis..."

Robin: "Right! That's, er, that's enough music for now lads."
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GalleryGod Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-15-05 01:46 PM
Response to Original message
11. We saw "Spamalot" on Broadway on July 2nd ! Hilarious !
Most fun in a Broadway theater in decades !:rofl: :spray: :rofl:
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Initech Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-15-05 02:18 PM
Response to Original message
13. Holy hand grenades, Batman!
:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:
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nytemare Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-15-05 02:34 PM
Response to Original message
14. "That's no ordinary rabbit"
That's the most foul, cruel, and bad-tempered rodent you ever set eyes on! Look, that rabbit's got a vicious streak a mile wide! It's a killer!
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