Estranged from your siblings? How/when did it happen? >

[mr_hat]

I'd love to hear.

My immediate sibling removed me from her life 15 years ago and I never learned why.

You? How did you manage to re-connect, if you did?

[diplomats]

1. You mean you have NO idea why?

Non whatsoever? Hard to believe that a sibling would just stop talking to the other for no reason.

[mr_hat]

20. I mean all I have is conjecture. >

My mother said I never thanked my sister after she flew from NoCal to SoCal to comfort me after my wife left me.

As iffy as my memory is, it just doesn't seem like me that I'd neglect basic courtesy in such a situation -- I've never had a problem expressing thanks for the kindness of strangers, let alone kin.

I reckon there's gotta be something (bigger, wickeder) than that that, as I said, I'm not aware of.

[medeak]

2. SIL was on drugs

had to raise her kids. We liked her better when she was drugged..is mentally ill.

there has to be a reason.. hello!

edited to say my only sibling is the greatest friend I have. Total unconditional love.

[jpgray]

3. My sibling and I are best friends

We are utterly comfortable with one another. Maybe too comfortable. :D

[funkybutt]

11. Us too!

but my parents are a different story.

[OldLeftieLawyer]

4. I got one

A sister.

She's so nuts. She makes freepers look like tree-huggers.

The one time I tuned into the Bill O'Reilly show, he was reading comments from viewers.

Guess whose he read?

Right. Hers.

But, she really left us, and we're ok with it.

[IChing]

15. That must be tough

sometimes you must wonder where the tree was that dropped that fruit

The polarization of families in the civil war, the american revolution, and vietnam.

[China_cat]

5. When I was 5

and my stepfather adopted me as a sop to my mother for making her dump me on my grandparents. I grew up with them as an 'only' child even though I have 2 sisters. They've always been jealous of me for getting THINGS they were never able to have. I've always hated them because they had my mother. She died when I was 18 and they were 15 and 10 and so they resent the fact that I at least got to know her even from a distance. My youngest sister barely remembers her at all. It's a vicious circle.

We're closer now, but not close, if that makes any sense. I'm very close to my youngest sister's daughter and that helps. If my other sister and I never saw each other again neither of us would miss the other.

[knowbody0]

6. banished from family for mating outside the racial thingy

[China_cat]

7. How sad for you all.

[knowbody0]

8. yeah, i have six sibblings

we were raised Catholic. i lost my family and my religion, so i had to recreate myself..............

[jmm]

9. I'll make this as short as possible.

When my parents met they were both living with other people. Dad had a daughter named Lisa with his girlfriend Carol and my mom would soon have a son with her boyfriend. That didn't stop him from pursuing her. He was also seriously dating a woman named Georgeanne and knowing him a number of other women not so seriously. Carol and Georgeanne were both friends with each other and my mom. They were willing to put up with this because they knew this was the only way they could have him in their lives. My mom broke up with my brother's father the day he was born and pretty soon agreed to date my father but only if he moved out of Carol's house and stopped dating other women. He did and six months later they were married. They broke up when I was six and he immediately moved in with Georgeanne who lived next door to Carol and resumed his old love triangle. Neither of these women liked me. After all I was a constant reminder of the woman he left them for. To put it mildly this did little to help my relationship with Lisa. Even now she's still telling people she resents me over petty stuff I have no control over or problems she's brought onto herself. Occasionally we'll see each other at family gatherings but other than that we have nothing to do with each other.

[MissB]

10. I'm sorry

It sounds like neither of your parents were really ready to have kids.

[jmm]

14. Mom definitely could've waited five years

I love her and think she's done great raising my brother and I virtually alone but she's admitted that her messed up family situation is the reason she wanted kids. I don't know if my dad's ever been ready to have kids. The only time I can remember having a heart to heart conversation with Lisa was when we found out his girlfriend (now ex) was pregnant with my little sister Danielle who is now nine. After talking for a couple of hours we put him on three way and made him promise not to have anymore. I'm glad to see he is better with her than he was with us but now I think he's gone too far trying to over compensate for all the mistakes he made with Lisa and me. He and her mom shouldn't have to call me up to discipline her or deal with her school problems.

[Blue Diadem]

12. We were all pretty far apart..in age and with one in lifestyle,

I was 3 when my oldest bro finished HS and left home to move to California. We still keep in contact..but not alot lately because he began drinking again and saying stupid crap. Loves to call me a commie among other things. He's a really nice guy when he's sober..talks like a liberal..but when he's drunk he acts like he's Zel Miller and gets very nasty. He's always been politcal so needless to say, one can not avoid talking politics with him.

2nd oldest bro left home when I was in 2nd grade. Went into the service, stationed in Germany, 2 Viet Nam tours..came back a different man..totally different than the boy I remember. Moved down south and lived a lifestyle I couldn't tolerate. His wife got him into the KKK, there were times, back in the Grenada years that he was a mercenary. Later he became a bounty hunter and a PI. He passed away in 2000 still suffering tremendously from PTSD. My last words to him were years ago, when I told him that he was my brother and I loved him and always would, but I could never tolerate or believe in what he'd become, nor could I take my children around he and his family to see and hear hate. I can still remember hubby and I driving home at midnight on a New Years Eve with our 3 small children for hundreds and hundreds of miles because he pulled out KKK literature and his soldier of fortune stuff.

3rd bro's closest in age to me. Haven't spoken to him in about a year. He's quiet, never much to say. Suffers from depression from his Viet Nam days.

Sister had downs syndrome and passed away at 39.

[OldLeftieLawyer]

17. What a sad story

You have made a good life for yourself, yes? Your three kids are all right, and so are you and your husband?

You have family here - as do I - at DU. That counts.

:toast:

[Blue Diadem]

21. Thank you, I feel we're all family here too.

Yes, we've done ok. Kids are grown, 2 have their own kids, third will be married next year. Our family keeps growing! Hubby and I celebrated our 31st anniversary this year.

:toast:

[catmandu57]

13. Well, I'm not estranged from all of them

things are a little strained with a couple right now, and my two closest brothers we're totally cutoff. My oldest younger brother, his life fell apart, and he became a foaming at the mouth ditto head focus on the family absolute freak I've distanced myself from him intentionally.
The next one, it's kind of hard to explain, we're not really estranged, but he stays in his world and I stay in mine.
My half brothers are pissed at me because I would't see my mother for years even when she got sick and died, I didn't go to the funeral.
My mother was evil and that's being polite, between her, my father, and stepfather they threw a huge monkey wrench in my psycosocial development.
They, my mother and stepfather were physically abusive as well, and I got it more than the younger ones.
But I don't care, I'm free it may sound strange but it feels good, nad this is the way I prefer it.

[OldLeftieLawyer]

18. Try this:

When I was a kid my Sardinian step-grandfather - a great guy, socialist, just hated the establishment, even back then - taught me this saying, which made no sense at all to me until about ten years ago:

"It's better to be alone than to be in bad company."

Smart old guy, my Grandpop.

And now, you feel good without those bad people, and so I give Grandpop's saying to you.......

[Obamarama]

16. Not really estranged.....more like out of touch due to apathy.

I'm the youngest of seven. There were a group of 4 kids clustered closely within age, a gap of several years, and then three more clustered within ten years of each other.

I'm close with my next two older siblings, and with just one of my siblings from the "older" set.

The other three I'm not really estranged from, but we just don't communicate outside of obligatory family events. They've clearly never really become comfortable with the fact that their youngest brother is gay. There's never been any outward hostility, but they NEVER make inquiries about my life, what my partner and I are doing, etc... They also don't expend any energy to be part of my life or maintain any type of ongoing relationship. I've tried at various times to reach out, but have been met with lackluster results. We keep track of each other through the siblings that I have a good relationship with, but other than that I really don't think about them much, nor do I suppose they give me much thought.

It's odd...its like we're distant cousins or something instead of brothers and sisters. It used to bother me, but I finally accepted that just because we came out of the same womb does not obligate us to have a sustained relationship. I've done what I could do, so I guess that's all I can do.

[Rowdyboy]

19. Baby brother died 10 years ago...We hadn't spoken in months...

Younger brother and wife LOVE me and my partner, see us frequently and all is good.

2 younger Sisters are another story altogether. One was hooked on oxycontin for awhile and had to be institutionalized. When her marriage broke up she lost custody of her child for being an unfit mother. We haven't spoken, however, because she disapproves of my homosexuality and apparently hates my male partner.

The other sister evidently terrified my nephew as a child because he was always afraid to get anywhere near me. I know they filled his head full of shit about me-and I knew it 15 years ago when he was a toddler. Now he's 17, a high school dropout with a baby. My sister and I avoid each other because (drum roll............) she doesn't care for my homosexuality and disapproves of my male partner.

Okay, these two women have fractured, unsatisfying, dysfunctional lives but they DISAPPROVE OF ME? I'm sorry, I don't give a shit what they think.

Now, at holidays, my partner and I see my brother and his wife. I send a card to one sister and ignore the other.

I know this is too much information but, hey, you asked and I'm REALLY bored!