Things to Say to Recruiters When They Call for Your Kids
mondo joe
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Fri Jun-17-05 11:07 AM
Original message
Things to Say to Recruiters When They Call for Your Kids
"I'd be glad to get my son. I don't mind saying my period has been kind of weird ever since I gave birth to him. Sometimes it's heavy, sometimes it's light - and right now is really one of those heavy days. Sometimes..."
clydefrand
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Fri Jun-17-05 11:10 AM
Response to Original message
1. I'll wait until the president's daughters go into combat and then
I'll think about your having access to my children.
mondo joe
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Fri Jun-17-05 11:13 AM
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2. My son is in his bedroom listening to Barbra Streisand CDs and
ironing his jeans. Hold on - I'll get him."
Blue-Jay
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Fri Jun-17-05 11:19 AM
Response to Reply #2
jmm
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Fri Jun-17-05 11:13 AM
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3. Why waste your time with my child when
I'm sure you'd have better luck calling the local young Republican clubs and pro-war protesters. I'm sure they're dying (pun intended) to enlist.
Deep13
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Fri Jun-17-05 11:15 AM
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4. "You will have to wait a few minutes. ...
... it takes a while to get around in a wheelchair."
ismnotwasm
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Fri Jun-17-05 11:18 AM
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5. He's not home right now
Do you mind posting bail?
Deep13
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Fri Jun-17-05 11:19 AM
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Cannikin
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Fri Jun-17-05 11:20 AM
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Enraged_Ape
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Fri Jun-17-05 11:20 AM
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8. He's upstairs with his boyfriend tripping on windowpane acid
Cannikin
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Fri Jun-17-05 11:21 AM
Response to Reply #8
10. I really would love to hear a response to that
Deep13
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Fri Jun-17-05 11:25 AM
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11. Just as soon as he is done praying to Allah.
mondo joe
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Fri Jun-17-05 11:27 AM
Response to Reply #11
13. "Ali, put down your prayer beads and come get the phone!"
Shoeempress
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Fri Jun-17-05 11:26 AM
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12. Why, have all the Republicans already enlisted?
micrometer_50
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Fri Jun-17-05 11:28 AM
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14. He's in prison right now,
can I have him call you back in 3 to 5 years?
Deep13
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Fri Jun-17-05 11:32 AM
Response to Reply #14
18. for murdering authority figures.
Edited on Fri Jun-17-05 11:33 AM by Deep13
"He'll be fine in the army as long as no one tries to tell him what to do."
micrometer_50
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Fri Jun-17-05 11:42 AM
Response to Reply #18
he's in for armed burgulary. :cry:
LeftPeopleFinishFirst
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Fri Jun-17-05 11:28 AM
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15. "I'll have him call you back after his date with Marcus"
Deep13
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Fri Jun-17-05 11:28 AM
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16. "Why? Our mission has already been accomplished."
radwriter0555
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Fri Jun-17-05 11:30 AM
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"Hi, I'm Joey's home visitation physical therapist..."
Heidi
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Fri Jun-17-05 11:30 AM
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17. "No thanks, I'm planning to kill him/her myself without
government assistance. But hey, thanks for the offer!"
Midlodemocrat
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Fri Jun-17-05 11:34 AM
Response to Reply #17
19. LOL. That is very funny!
Heidi
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Fri Jun-17-05 11:59 AM
Response to Reply #19
22. It's all kind of fuzzy now . . .
but I have what seems like a memory of my mother saying that very thing to a recruiter who called our house in 1980. :rofl:
WeRQ4U
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Fri Jun-17-05 11:50 AM
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21. "I'd rather help my son pay student loans than let you kill him." OR...
"The family is planning a trip overseas this summer anyway. And this way, we won't get shot at."
Kraklen
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Fri Jun-17-05 12:01 PM
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23. I'll have him give you a call as soon as he gets back from the
bathhouse. He loves men in uniform.
Cannikin
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Fri Jun-17-05 12:02 PM
Response to Reply #23
madinmaryland
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Fri Jun-17-05 12:03 PM
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25. Uhh, he has other priorities for the next several years,
but he supports the war! :evilgrin:
Deep13
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Fri Jun-17-05 12:04 PM
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26. You can talk to him when I am done changing the filter for his iron lung.
Liberalynn
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Fri Jun-17-05 12:05 PM
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27. It Will Take Him a few minutes
Edited on Fri Jun-17-05 12:06 PM by Liberalynn
he just got a new pair of six inch heels and he's had trouble getting around in them. or "Now son put down that knife, Mommy didn't mean to eat the last Ding Dong."
JohnKleeb
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Fri Jun-17-05 12:06 PM
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28. sure heres a good one
Yeah I'll have him call you back but him and his boyfriends are looking for a place in Dupont Circle to live.
Deep13
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Fri Jun-17-05 12:08 PM
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29. "What are you wearing?"
mondo joe
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Fri Jun-17-05 12:16 PM
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30. "It might take him a minute - he's breaking in his new stilettos
and the phone is clear across the living room."
Deep13
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Fri Jun-17-05 02:30 PM
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31. He's returned to Saturn to report to our galactic commander.
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