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LastKnight Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-16-05 11:41 PM
Original message
ever get the feeling the universe is against you?
god, fate, or whatever's your preference... ever feel like its somehow plotting against you? i wonder sometimes...
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Dude_CalmDown Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-16-05 11:45 PM
Response to Original message
1. So you're at the stage where you're just getting the feeling?
Let me know when you understand it as a fact.
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LastKnight Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-16-05 11:46 PM
Response to Reply #1
4. no its been that way for awhile...
just didnt wanna say something on a whim.
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tarkus Donating Member (780 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-16-05 11:45 PM
Response to Original message
2. I am thankful for gravity pushing against me, as it keeps me on the ground
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Trajan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-16-05 11:45 PM
Response to Original message
3. Today: Fate had some of DU against me ...
I should know better than to stand up in a bar fight ...

Haters need to be left to their own designs ... I should have known ...

Civility is dead ....
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Floogeldy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-16-05 11:47 PM
Response to Original message
5. That's not "the universe against you."
That's God, getting your attention.

B-)
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LastKnight Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-16-05 11:48 PM
Response to Reply #5
6. god coulda just asked...
wonder what my attention is needed for...
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tarkus Donating Member (780 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-16-05 11:51 PM
Response to Reply #6
8. God wouldn't get much respect by just asking people things, I don't think.
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Trajan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-16-05 11:58 PM
Response to Reply #8
17. Really ? ..
He asks for worship ...

He asks for fidelity ...

He asks for strict adherence to his creed ...

He asks for punishments against sinners ...

He asks that homosexuals be stoned to death ...

It seems YHWH/Jesus/Flamie asks for LOTS of things ....
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Floogeldy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-16-05 11:53 PM
Response to Reply #6
11. You could ask God, too.
B-)
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LastKnight Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-16-05 11:55 PM
Response to Reply #11
14. ive been tryin for years.
havent heard back. eventuially i think im gonna get sick of not hearing back...
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Floogeldy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-16-05 11:57 PM
Response to Reply #14
16. Have you tried drinking heavily?
B-)
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LastKnight Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-17-05 12:06 AM
Response to Reply #16
23. i dont drink.
i know, hard to believe huh?

ive actuially considered starting, though.
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all.of.me Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-16-05 11:50 PM
Response to Original message
7. the universe isn't against you
it's nudging you to a better direction. ever hear of the path of least resistance? find the easier way, because the way you're going ain't right for you right now.

another saying - 'don't push the river; let it flow.' barry stevens
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LastKnight Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-16-05 11:52 PM
Response to Reply #7
10. then why does this...
better direction suck (at least right now, anyway)? i liked the way i was going...
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Kenneth ken Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-16-05 11:55 PM
Response to Reply #10
15. you answered your own question
"I liked the way I was going."

Being lazy and slovenly is easy too, and may even be enjoyable in the short term, but in the long term it isn't very good for you. :)

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LastKnight Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-16-05 11:58 PM
Response to Reply #15
18. lazy wasnt the problem...
infact ive lost all my motivation since shit went sour... i was truly honestly happy, so i guess it was time for things to change.
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Kenneth ken Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-17-05 12:21 AM
Response to Reply #18
27. I didn't say you were being lazy
I said being lazy is easy. The way your life was going was easier than it is now. IIRc school recently ended for you (I don't know if for the summer or what) so now you have a change in your life, at least temporarily and so opportunites to grow your wisdom. The breakup allows you freedom to meet new people, explore life from their perspectives, and learn things.

But for that to happen, you have to prep your self, so embrace the opportunity, tuck the joys of your past within you, and savor them in quiet moments.

If you go back to school in the fall, and encounter your former flame, do you want to be able to tell her you did cool things and met interesting people over the summer, or do you want to say you moped around lost and wounded?

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LastKnight Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-17-05 12:26 AM
Response to Reply #27
29. you have a good point
Edited on Fri Jun-17-05 12:28 AM by LastKnight
and i thank you for the encouragement... and im sorry to everyone that im bitching so much about this... im just havin a hard time latley.

as im sure ive referenced other places in this thread and plenty of other times... im having job problems, family problems, friend problems, girl problems... and due to said job problems, may be having problems paying for school this coming year. i could handle all these things individually... but when they all pile up... i start to break.

thanks again for the... unique outlook.
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Kenneth ken Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-17-05 12:46 AM
Response to Reply #29
38. you're very welcome
don't worry about crabbing too much, those of us who are older know how difficult it is to be young.

Sounds like you have nearly unlimited opportunities for growing and becoming wiser this summer.

I don't know enough about most of the problems you listed to offer advice, but I will say about school; there is no rule that says you have to finish by a certain time. Tucker (Aliengirl) just graduated last week, at 32. She overcame an awful lot to do that; if you have to cut back your credit hours for a semester ro two, or even skip a semester, that is allowed, but if it comes to that, do keep your eyes on the goal and don't let a speed bump throw you completely off the road.

I do wish you well :hug:

:hi:

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LastKnight Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-17-05 12:48 AM
Response to Reply #38
39. thanks again.
Edited on Fri Jun-17-05 12:48 AM by LastKnight
fuck... im graduating, someday. if i accomplish one thing... thats it.
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all.of.me Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-16-05 11:59 PM
Response to Reply #10
19. because life is not flawless, painless or always pretty
if you want to grow, you'll have to live. if you want to live, you'll have to grow.

here is a quote by derrick jensen talking about kafka:

"But no redemption can be found in the avoidance of difficult issues. Redemption comes only after we have moved through the horrors of our present situation to the better world that lies beyond it."
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dxstone Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-16-05 11:52 PM
Response to Original message
9. yeah... I do...
all the time...
I think I musta been hitler in my last...
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LastKnight Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-16-05 11:53 PM
Response to Reply #9
12. yea, im gettin that vibe myself...
i musta done somethin pretty damn wrong to diserve what im gettin.
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Swede Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-16-05 11:54 PM
Response to Original message
13. Try to be more positive.
Positive thinking does work.
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dxstone Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-17-05 12:00 AM
Response to Reply #13
20. I'm POSITIVE I musta been Hitler...
Better?

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AlienGirl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-17-05 12:23 AM
Response to Reply #20
28. If you were, look how far you've come--you're a liberal now!
See, things aren't as bad as they seem!

Tucker
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dxstone Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-17-05 12:59 AM
Response to Reply #28
43. LOL! ...that's pretty good...
Life can't last forever either... can it?
:scared:
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Floogeldy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-17-05 12:01 AM
Response to Original message
21. Maybe you were born without a soul . . .
. . . and you are the child of SATAN, DESTINED TO ACHIEVE THE ULTIMATE EVIL?

Or not.

B-)
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LastKnight Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-17-05 12:02 AM
Response to Reply #21
22. lol
never say never... i guess...
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lenidog Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-17-05 12:10 AM
Response to Original message
24. I sometimes write it up to Karma and I wonder what I did so wrong in
my previous life to get this mess. Then my girlfriend/best friend calls or shows up and I forget all about it.
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LastKnight Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-17-05 12:14 AM
Response to Reply #24
25. thats kinda where my sticking point is...
Girlfriend left me outta nowhere, friends are too busy for me. i cant find work so i donno if ill be able to hack tuition next school year. and family has no idea who i am and have more interest in drilling me about not having a job rather than helping me with my problems. im kinda running outta hope... i try to be positive but i dont know how to find a silver lining on this one.
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AlienGirl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-17-05 12:28 AM
Response to Reply #25
30. It can really suck sometimes
:hug: My ex-husband left me (with no warning) when I was very ill from cancer. I know how it can seem like everything sucks. The very best advice I have is to batten down the hatches and weather the storm.

And if the hopelessness gets too bad, don't be afraid to seek professional help. Counseling can be good for anyone, especially during times of crisis.

Tucker
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LastKnight Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-17-05 12:29 AM
Response to Reply #30
31. ok, wow, i guess i really dont have any right to complain...
thanks for the encouragement.
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AlienGirl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-17-05 12:33 AM
Response to Reply #31
34. You have as much right as anybody
I'm not trying to race you to the bottom. Just wanted you to know that life has ups and downs, and it is possible to wait out the down times.

Tucker
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lenidog Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-17-05 12:31 AM
Response to Reply #30
33. Sorry I have to say this about him
VERMIN!!
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lenidog Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-17-05 12:31 AM
Response to Reply #25
32. It sucks I know I have been where you are at
you just have to hang in there and keep fighting. I lost my girlfriend a month ago. Found out that she was cheating on me, That sucks I was depressed for about a week till my best friend called to see how I was doing. I have known he since I was 10 and before the end of the phone call she declared dibs on me since we were both single and now I have a girlfriend who is also my best friend and knows every damn thing there is to know about me. So I can be myself around her. You never know when things will change you just have to keep swinging.
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LastKnight Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-17-05 12:43 AM
Response to Reply #32
36. in all truth... the bottom is a familiar place to me...
Edited on Fri Jun-17-05 12:45 AM by LastKnight
before i met her, i was mess... struggling every day to not give in to the constant thought of suicide... i figured id give it 1 year of college to see if things would improve... and they did, i met her, we started out as friends, i told her all my problems, fears, hopes and dreams. i was the closest person on earth to her... and her to i.

we eventuially started going out... and for awhile anyway... i was the happiest id ever been, every day got better and better every hour i spent with her i felt more alive. she even was talking about marrige and a future... which didnt scare me when she said it... i even felt the same. but whenever any other girl had said it to me it scared the living shit out of me. but not with her.

then summer came, we missed each other and spent hours on the phone each night... despite frequent visits, i could feel her growing more distant. then about a week and a half ago she just left me. adding it to the pile of problems that had been mounting over time... i had depended on her as my support, she kept me going through all the other problems. and now its gone.

and here i am again, one year later, having made no progress, if anything im in deeper depression than i had been. but for some reason im still here. i cant explain it. but i am.

again im sorry to keep posting depressing shit on everyone... im sorry.
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lenidog Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-17-05 12:58 AM
Response to Reply #36
40. Don't worry about it
Depression and me are old friends. People drift away even when thing seem all right can't explain why they just do. I mean hey I thought everything was wine and roses with my last girlfriend and here I find out she is screwing someone else. Though what I dod suggest is that perhaps through school or someone other venue you find out where you can get some counseling. I think it would help you alot to talk to a professional. One thing I do want you to remember and to take to heart is that everything changes, things will get better and you will probably never see it coming when it does. Just keep on going. I know it seems tough and hopless sometimes, that everything you do or plan turns to shit but you just have to keep working at it. Set youself goals maybe small ones at first and accomplish them and when they have been reached set up larger goals and go for them. Things like that will give you the encouragement and confidence to keep going. If you ever need anyone to talk to PM me I lurk around here every night and for a couple more weeks I will be around here during the days becuse they are doing renovations at work. Which means I can't work but I am still getting paid because of the union rules.
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LastKnight Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-17-05 01:04 AM
Response to Reply #40
44. thanks.

i might take you up on that offer. im around usuially the same times... being up all night and around all day.
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lenidog Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-17-05 01:12 AM
Response to Reply #44
46. No problem even when I am not really hanging around DU
and occupied somewhere else on the net I usually have a window open to it an pop in to see what is up. Worst comes to worst you will almost always get a reply that evening,
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Kenneth ken Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-17-05 12:58 AM
Response to Reply #36
41. ah but you have made progress
you survived another year.
you know, or should know you are capable of loving and being loved.

When you were a baby, one day you stood up, and toddled, then likely fell down. But you learned from that, and after toddling for a while you stopped falling down.

You are learning independence, and will probably fall down a few times, but if you hold close each thing you learn, it gets easier to be independent. It isn't really healthy to be too dependenat on anothe rperson; your former flame gave you a gift of love, and also a gift of freedom to learn to stand better on your own. You ought not feel bitter toward her for either gift, but instead cherish the gifts.
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LastKnight Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-17-05 01:11 AM
Response to Reply #41
45. i guess so...
hopefully i can see it that way in time. i honestly can kinda see what youre saying. it does make some sense to me. hopefully it will make alot more sense in time.

i havent been bitter toward her... i just wanted her back... but i guess its time for me to let go... and youre right about the gift thing... she did give me alot.

have i said thanks to you yet? i probably have but heres another one...

thanks
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merh Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-17-05 12:18 AM
Response to Original message
26. Well, now that you mention it
Yes, yes I do.

Something about running over a gypsy? :crazy: I'm trying to remember when I might have done that without realizing it. Maybe it was in another life? :shrug:

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Heidi Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-17-05 12:40 AM
Response to Original message
35. It's just a feeling.
Feelings aren't always accurate barometers of the truth. Life is cyclical and if you're in a "down" cycle, you can be sure that an "up" cycle will follow.
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Tsiyu Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-17-05 12:46 AM
Response to Original message
37. About one percent of the time
The other 99% I spend just trying to follow the plot...
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lenidog Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-17-05 12:59 AM
Response to Reply #37
42. There is a plot!?
I want to find the scriptwriter because I have a problem with a few of the scenes:)
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leftofthedial Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-17-05 01:15 AM
Response to Original message
47. yup
the last six months of my life have been hell.

one thing after another after another after another . . .
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