BREAKING-Runaway Bride was fallen in a well

[underpants]

AP-The "Runaway Bride" Jennifer Wilbanks has apparently fallen in a Duluth Georgia well.

At the time of this news posting none of the highly trained professionals of the national news organizations were on hand so preliminary reports are from lowly local reporters.

Wilbank's fiancee John Mason was heard to yell encouragement to his would be bride and promises to "get you out". Faint replies were heard from inside the well that sounded like "It's okay" and "Tunneling out". Noises that sounded like wild scratchy could also be heard, it has been reported.

When asked for comment the Mason family's pastor and therapist Dr.Smiley was not available but a member of his church did say, "Well the girl tried going west to get away from them but that didn't work, she can't go very far east or south and she already tried calling attention to herself by flying a plane at the White House last week so I guess her only options were head north or try to burrow out" the church member who apparently had volunteered to cut the grass at the church asked not to be identified.

Despite the lack of information from trained professional journalists opinions have been plentiful. Tim Russert, host of NBC's "Meet the Press", said: "I can't see anyway that this won't work positively for President Bush's campaign to personalize Social Security".

Tim Mathews, host of MSNBC's "Hardball", said: "Man Bush has the most unbelievable political acumen I have seen from ANY President this century. MAN would I like to have a beer with that guy".

When asked White House Spokesman Scott McLellan said:"We, the President, hopes for the best in this family and their fellow members of faith and trusts that all will work out in the end. Now I have a fistful of Newsweek stuff to talk about..." McLellan said the White House had no contingency plan to block off I95 to allow the necessary teams of professional journalists and crews to more easily travel to cover this breaking story but he did offer: "Maybe Newsweek can send Isikoff down there to find out what really happened" which was followed by labored laughter from the White House newsmen.


ww.ap-south/runawaybride/65482354.com

[Taxloss]

1. Are you sure that she hasn't fallen to the bottom of a barrel?

And the media aren't scraping the bottom to retrieve her?

[jswordy]

2. Newsweek just reported that a well-placed unnamed source says...

...she was flushed into a septic tank along with a Quran.

So it was NOT a well. No word yet from Afghanistan.

Hey, it must be TRUE! Newsweek's unnamed source SAID SO!