My niece's fiancee made a remark I didn't like

[demnan]

In the course of conversation he said, "they say I have a kid out there, but it doesn't look like me".

So what do you think, is the guy a lying bum, or what?

[davidinalameda]

1. who is they

and do you think that he could have a kid out there

my bet is that he is a lying bum

he's a man--you know how a man is lying--his lips are moving

and yes, I'm a man

[xultar]

4. Tell the truth my BRUVA! n/t

[sui generis]

7. if there's a question

then it's easy enough to determine whether he's the father or not.

Everything else is conjecture.

[xultar]

2. Aren't they all? I mean seriously, worse than being a lying bum he isn't

taking care of his kid. Sounds to me like he won't take care of your niece and maybe their future children.

Shows a lack of character I'd wanna discuss with her and make sure she knows what she's getting into. After the conversation...wash your hands of the situation and then :popcorn: when the games begin.

[Teaser]

3. It's a line from a song isn't it?

sounds familiar.

[ucmike]

10. sounds like a grateful dead song, but its not

"first one says she's got my child, but it don't look like me"

[stellanoir]

12. "Friend of the Devil"

by the Dead

[Sanity Claws]

5. How fast can your niece run?

A paternity test would indicate whether it is his.
If he were responsible, he would have one done.
So I don't know whether he is lying but he definitely is not responsible and I'll bet he is hiding something.
Run, girl, run.

[Jessica]

6. "It" ??

Is he being pressed for child support? If not, maybe "they" don't want him in the baby's life.

Only one way to find out the truth ... Maury.

;-) :)

[JimmyJazz]

8. If he were a decent human being and even suspected he might

have a child, he would do everything to either confirm or deny it. Otherwise, he's just a schmuck. IMHO, of course.

[lenidog]

16. I think you are being generous

but then again I would probably be tombstoned for what I would call him

[NewJeffCT]

9. I used to joke...

after my ex-wife filed for divorce and prior to my 2nd marriage that I had no kids - that I know of. Of course, if you got to know me, you'd know that I'm not that sleep with a different babe every night type of guy...

But, that is a strange comment by your niece's fiance. Did you ask him to clarify at at all? With DNA tests out there, your niece could be stuck with a guy paying child support.

[gollygee]

11. I would never marry a man who called *any* child "it"

let alone a child that might be his own.

[demnan]

13. Ok, so I'm not crazy

Actually in the course of the conversation I happened to bring up that my brother (Lisa's father who deserted her and she knows is a bum) had a child by his first marriage he didn't accept as his.

I was hoping to wake her up without the difficulty of a direct confrontation. I don't think she got it.

The wedding is planned for June 5 - I doubt I can pursuade her not to marry him. I might try.

[dflprincess]

14. What is it with guys who think they can't be the father

because the child doesn't look like them? (Being unemployed, I've seen one too many Maury Povich DNA shows where the guy uses this as a reason to deny paternity.) Haven't any of these guys heard of genetics? One of my nephews doesn't look like either his mom or my brother, but he is the spitting image of my grandfather. For that matter, my mom and her siblings don't look at all like their dad; none of the grandchildren look like him, but there are several of his great-grandchildren where his looks suddenly popped up. Weird how genes look.

[Zookeeper]

20. You are so right...

My mother is 5'2, I'm much taller. My mother is "well-endowed," my "gifts" are more modest. Our facial features are not particularly similar. I know a child with the most intense red hair, when the rest of his family's hair color is deep black or brown.

"It doesn't look like me," is a BS excuse, and I'll bet even the guy knows it. He just doesn't take his responsibility seriously and thinks he can get away with it.

[lenidog]

15. I am smelling a rat and its in the shape of your niece's fiancee

I mean if I even thought for a second I had a kid out there with someone I would have a paternity test done. Just to ease my mind. If it was my kid then I would take full responsibility. Sounds like he knows its his kid or a very good chance and is trying to be a rat and not live up to his responsibility. Did your niece hear him say this? A comment like that should send up warning sign. It sounds like if your niece ever got pregnant by accident he would be out the door.

[Arkana]

17. Your internal polygraph probably jumped off the charts

As would mine. The guy's hiding something.

[Heidi]

18. I would have called him on it, and let him flail about in front of his

fiancé. If he were a decent guy, he'd _know_ whether he had a kid out there because once he heard the rumor, he would have wanted to be part of his child's life, including assisting in the child's support.

You still have the option of allowing Pad Thai (sp?) and Lily to have a go at him, though.

[Bunny]

19. How old is he?

If he's pretty young, he may just be parroting a line he heard somewhere - a line that he fancies makes him look cool, macho, whatever. He may be too young to realize just how bad that comes across.

If he is old enough to know better, I'd tell your niece to run! But with the wedding coming up in June, she's not likely to break it off.

Oh well, some people have to learn the hard way. I say that only because that is how I learned, unfortunately.

[miss_kitty]

21. Well it's a good thing he's not YOUR fiance then, isn't it.

I really can't assess most people based on an out of context sentence, no tone of voice, facial expression etc