If I were elected Pope...

[ScreamingMeemie]

Incense would smell like "Cool Waters" because I really like it.

Every third Sunday would be open mike Mass...

...and I'd bring back some of the funny stuff...like tying water faucets shut on Good Friday....and Milk Bottle Baby collections...

And we'd all have Hot Chocolate for wine...

[Longgrain]

1. I disagree with the wine myself...

Me I'd suggest a full bar at every Mass...could really draw in the parishioners.

[Debi]

2. And bump up confessions!

http://www.putfile.com/media.php?n=OfficeParty.mpg

[Longgrain]

3. But at least the collection box...er jar

would be fuller.

[MADem]

4. I would start up VATICAN III

Priests can marry.
Women can be priests.
Birth control and condoms are IN.
The focus goes back to LOVE--horseshit, senseless rules take a back seat.

Of course, they'd probably serve me a great big heaping plate of "Smiling Pope" pasta the minute I made my first Urbi et Orbi speech!

[ScreamingMeemie]

5. Don't you mean a cup of "Smiling Pope" Coffee?

That's what I always heard. ;) :hi:

[MADem]

6. Well, I like to eat, as did the late Smiling Pope

So they could probably take me out with a small caprese salad, some cappellini al limone and a good glass of local wine. I generally eschew the caffe late in the evening, keeps me awake!

[Fenris]

7. Funny hats for everyone.

Robert Novak would be excommunicated "just because."

[ScreamingMeemie]

8. Yesssss! Bring back the mantilla!

:bounce:

[Fenris]

9. Sexay!

:bounce:

[ReadTomPaine]

10. I'd buy Ferrari and bring back the old Mille Miglia

Race in the first one with the new turbine powered "Popemobile II" and come in a credible second to Mike Schumacher. Think of the new converts!

On edit - Oh yeah, and I'd bring back the old rule that nobody could buy a new, holy Ferrari without a thumbs up and a personal audience. How many months before total world control, eh?

RTP

[bigwillq]

11. Open mike mass-YES!

I've been saying that for years! I think all churches should have that! I would go every week if that were the case.:hi: