West Wing Fans: Funniest Moment

[mcscajun]

I've selected, wherever possible, an identifying quote from the scene in question. Choices are in no particular order. :)

[Salviati]

1. My name is Toby Ziegler, and I work in the White House...

[DarienComp]

2. "Didn't vote for him the first time, don't plan to the second time."

;-)

[LandOLincoln]

3. Mrs. Landingham telling Bartlet

his attitude towards vegetables was "unpresidential."

[Hong Kong Cavalier]

4. Josh Lyman, near the end of the first season:

"Senator, you can take you congressional agenda and shove it up your ass."
<Tosses the phone over his shoulder to Donna, who catches it.>
"Turns out I was fine."

<Start Credits>

[havocmom]

5. Scene with Hal Holbrook playing a rambling know it all in Oval Office

and Bartlet pounding his head on the desk if frustration and boredom.

[Rainbowreflect]

6. When President Bartlet tells off the Dr. Laura wannabe.

That was the first West Wing I ever saw, in re-runs, and I was hooked.

[LeftyDarthBrodie]

24. Thats the scene that got me hooked

but so many posted here are great moments. 99% of which came during the Sorkin run.

[tigereye]

28. that is one of my favorites too

[bertha katzenengel]

7. Toby to his twins: "Who knew babies came with hats?"

Not the funniest, but one of the sweetest. And I don't even like Toby that much. Even though I named a cat after him.

[Lisa]

14. a co-worker actually used this line when presented with her new baby ...

The hospital staff told her that a surprising number of people have quoted it!

[bertha katzenengel]

16. Cool!

:woohoo:

[Lisa]

31. the funny thing is -- they don't all come with hats!

The staff explained (and she later passed it on to me) that the main function of the hat isn't to keep the baby's head warm (as I'd originally imagined) -- but to prevent the parents from freaking out when they see the kid's head looks kind of squished after the passage through the birth canal. (The plates in the skull are soft and haven't grown together yet, so the head appears "dented" at first.) One of the other mothers had a C-section and they didn't give her baby a hat -- there had been no "tight squeeze", so the head shape looked normal.

p.s. the WW quote that I actually did get to use was CJ's "the da-da of Dada" -- a friend of mine had gotten a part in a local theatrical production about one of the founders (fathers?) of Dadaism. I figured that I would NEVER get another chance like this, so I shamelessly dropped the phrase in there -- he thought it was hysterical. He's not a WW viewer so I am still wrestling with whether I should reveal that I didn't actually come up with it.

[Dave Sund]

33. A last supper, made entirely out of butter...

With, I kid you not... butter on the table.

[tavalon]

54. Not true

but amusing. Really, the hat is to keep the baby warm. They don't have good thermoregulation when they're first born and they're wet as well so the hat helps conserve their heat. The hat doesn't work to protect the parents from the misshapen head because 90% of them immediately take the baby's hat off to look.

Bet you can't guess what I do for a living, eh?

[Lisa]

60. might depend on the climate?

It was the late summer when this happened. My friend reported that the other mother, seeing that the other babies had hats on, actually requested a hat for her newborn too, and the nurse on the ward told her that it wasn't necessary in this particular case, because the baby was warm enough.

[MrModerate]

56. "Travesties" by Tom Stoppard, right?

Tristan Tsara and the guys?

Saw it in Seattle about 25 years ago.

[LSdemocrat]

8. Bartlet telling the staff that Zoey is coming over and he's making chili

"Okay everyone look at the big seal on the floor and look back up."

[tjwmason]

9. When Margaret tells Leo that she can forge the President's signature

As he didn't sign the relevant letter before receiving general anesthesia having been shot.

Spell-checker had fun with my first shot at anesthesia there...

[pres2032]

10. Josh telling CJ she's a "Berkley Schiksta feminista"

and CJ exploding in his face: "Missed the deans list two semesters in a row Harvard Yankee jackass!"
Reducing him to a bubbling fool, "feel better now that you got that off your chest?"
CJ: "I'm a whole new woman."


best exchange ever.

[GiovanniC]

11. Some Favorite Moments

Some funny, some... just cool.

Leo: You're going to meet him right now. It's going to be fine...
Ainsley: It's not going to be fine. He's gonna yell, and scream, I've seen him on TV...
Leo: Well, that's TV. He's making a full-throated defense of the President. That's what we do. Believe me, in real life, when the cameras are off...
Lionel: (screaming) I will KILL people today, Leo. I will KILL people with this cricket bat, which was given to me by Her Royal Majesty Elizabeth Windsor, and then I will kill them again WITH MY OWN HANDS.

==================================================

Josh: All I'm saying is, if you were in an accident, I wouldn't stop to get a beer.
Donna: If you were in an accident, I wouldn't stop for red lights.

==================================================

Josh: Victory is mine, victory is mine. Great day in the morning, victory is mine.
Donna: Good morning, Josh.
Josh: I drink from the keg of glory, Donna. Bring me the finest muffins and bagels in all the land.
Donna: It's going to be an unbearable day.

==================================================

Ambassador Ken Cochran: I want to speak to your supervisor.
Charlie: My supervisor? Well, I'm personal aide to the President, so right now my supervisor is kinda busy looking for a back door to throw you out of. But I'll let him know.

==================================================

Sam: Look, I really like her and she's not what's you think.
Josh: The only thing I know about her is that she's a call girl. Is she a call girl?
Sam: Yes.
Josh: Then so far she's exactly what I think.

==================================================

President Bartlet: you know that line you're not supposed to cross with the president?
C.J.: I'm coming up to it?
President Bartlet: No, no, look behind you.

==================================================

Josh: Where are you going?
President Bartlet: To a place called "Rare books." You know what they sell?
Josh: Fishing tackle?

[mcscajun]

12. Damn...the quotes didn't come through. Sorry, folks.

It sure did LOOK like they did in the Poll preview. Damn, damn, damn.

[GiovanniC]

13. Another Exchange:

Toby: Wanna play pool?
C.J.: I don't know how to play.
Toby: Then you wanna play for money?

[Lisa]

15. seeing as I can't read the quotes -- I'll take a guess ...

The one where Bartlet shows what an abysmal liar he is (placing a call to the Butterball Hotline under an assumed name)?

[mcscajun]

34. That's one!

Bingo!

"If I cook the stuffing inside my turkey, can I kill my guests? I'm not saying that would be a deal breaker."

[mcscajun]

35. As this thread is amazingly Still Alive, here are the Missing Quotes

1. "Ginger, get the popcorn."
2. "Donna, bring me the finest muffins and bagels in the land."
3. Oliver Babish smashing his recorder in front of Bartlet and Leo.
4. Lord Marbury: "May I inquire, Mr. President - the first thing that attracted you to Abigail - was it her magnificent breasts?"
5. "If I cook the stuffing inside my turkey, can I kill my guests? I'm not saying that would be a deal breaker."
6. The "practical joke war" between C.J. and Charlie over the President's Schedule.
7. "Which did you take, sir, the Vicadin or the Percocet?"
8. "Sir, I need you to dig in now. It wasn't a nightmare, you really are the president."
9. Josh yelling after the departing campaign bus in Indiana.
10. "Just remember these two things: she's nineteen years old, and the 82nd Airborne works for me."

(The order might not be precise.)

[tavalon]

55. I love that one! n/t

[MissMillie]

17. Charlie cutting the legs off of CJs desk

but I also liked it when CJ had emergency root canal surgery and Josh completely mucked up the press briefing w/ an insinuation that the President had a secret plan to fight inflation.

[fryguy]

18. Sam telling Toby he "accidentally" slept with a call girl:

"I don't understand. Did you trip over something?"

[MissMillie]

19. I liked this exchange:

Jed: "So tell Jeff Tomlinson and Bibby Bob to take a deep knee bend, would you? I'm just as big a cotton candy ass as they are."

Josh: "Yes, sir."

Jed: "You just going to let that hang in the air?"

Josh: "Of course not, sir. You're a much bigger cotton candy ass than they are."

Jed: "Damn right."

[fryguy]

20. and the for lawyers out there:

Bartlet: 27 lawyers in the room, anyone know "Post hoc, ergo propter hoc"? Josh?

Josh: Post - after, after hoc, ergo - therefore, "After hoc, therefore" something else hoc.

Bartlet: Thank you. Next?

[Not_Giving_Up]

21. When Donna accidentally left her underwear on the floor

After it fell out of her pants as she was trying to explain to a woman that Sam got the name of a country wrong when he spoke to her previously. Sam had talked to the woman to clean up something Josh had said, who was smoothing something over for Leo.

Donna's name was monogrammed into her undies, so they were couriered to Josh.

[Dave Sund]

22. Celestial Navagation

"I ha a woot canal!!"
"C.J., so help me, if you say the words "Pwesident," or "bwief" again..."
"Three days? Is he coming in from Neptune?"
"Are you telling me that not only do I have a secret plan to fight inflation, but now you don't support it?"
"We were navagating by the North Star, which turned out to be the Delta shuttle from Laguardia. It's a miracle we're not in Nantucket right now."

[Dave Sund]

53. This episode

which is probably the funniest WW ever, is on right now.

[underpants]

23. Charlie:"Zoe I work with some of the most intelligent people in the world"

(in the background Josh wipes out trying to sit down in his desk chair Donna sent out to get fixed)

[Aristus]

49. Damn! I was looking around, hoping not to find that quote so I could

post it as mine! You beat me to it! Yeah, that's my favorite; hands down, funniest moment in WW history...and that's going some.


Another good one:

Barlet: What were you doing in the closet?

Ainsley: I had to pee.

Barlet: They won't let me smoke in the building, but they'll let you pee in Leo's closet?

[DrGonzoLives]

25. Bartlet, high on medication

telling Sam he is seriously considering buying a dog.

Second place: Bartlet screaming at the UN SecGen - "THERE ARE SIGNS!! BIG SIGNS THAT SAY 'NO PARKING'"!

[Mallifica]

26. When they're out at a bar

and some guys try to hit on Zoey, and then start shit with Charlie. Josh says something to the effect of "you're about to have a really bad day" just before the secret service comes over.

[Borgnine]

27. Charlie and CJ's prank wars.

It was in the third season, and CJ kept taking Charlie's copy of the President's schedule without signing it out. So when CJ needed it again, she filed it away in Charlie's folders under A for "anal." When Charlie figured it out, he superglued her phone, switched her White House pass with his (so she would sound the alarm and security when walking in), and finally he cut the legs of her desk so it would collapse when slightly touched.

CJ: "How long do you make people your bitch?"

Charlie: "Depends."

[tigereye]

30. I tape the show

and I would rewind it over and over to make sure I got every rapid fire Hepburn and Tracey- style, delightful bit of dialogue. God bless Aaron Sorkin!

[Dave Sund]

32. Ed and Larry overhear that...

"Do you want to know what he's going to find in his file?"

[Beaverhausen]

29. CJ singing "I'm too sexy for my shirt"

[Catch22Dem]

37. I forgot about that.

Laughed my arse off!

[Beaverhausen]

42. "Too sexy for ... other things."

[mcscajun]

36. The Missing Quotes

Not in order, sorry.

1. "Ginger, get the popcorn."
2. "Donna, bring me the finest muffins and bagels in the land."
3. Oliver Babish smashing his recorder in front of Bartlet and Leo.
4. Lord Marbury: "May I inquire, Mr. President - the first thing that attracted you to Abigail - was it her magnificent breasts?"
5. "If I cook the stuffing inside my turkey, can I kill my guests? I'm not saying that would be a deal breaker."
6. The "practical joke war" between C.J. and Charlie over the President's Schedule.
7. "Which did you take, sir, the Vicadin or the Percocet?"
8. "Sir, I need you to dig in now. It wasn't a nightmare, you really are the president."
9. Josh yelling after the departing campaign bus in Indiana.
10. "Just remember these two things: she's nineteen years old, and the 82nd Airborne works for me."

[underpants]

45. Very funny but a note of correction

Oliver Babbish smashed his hiccupy malfunctioning tape recorder when he FOUND OUT the White House had called not in from of Barlet and Leo.

Two people have made that error. I remember it because it was the lead in to the show.

[LSdemocrat]

46. No it was in front of Bartlet and Leo

It was right after Bartlet told Babish that he was going to tell him a story and wanted to know if he had committed any crimes.

[mcscajun]

48. Nope...not an error.

The episode was just on the other day...again.

Leo and Bartlet walk in. He's already discussed his malfunctioning recorder with his staff before they arrive.

Bartlet: Well, Oliver, it really boils down to this I'm going to tell you a story and then I need you to tell me whether or not I've engaged 16 people in a massive criminal conspiracy to defraud the public in order to win a presidential election.

OLIVER
Okay.

He looks at the recorder on his desk with mistrust, then at the President. Then he picks up his gavel and smashes it.

That's it. Smash Cut to Main Title.

[underpants]

58. Hmm I could have sworn his secretary walked in and told him

Oh well I have been wrong before and I will be wrong again.

[BlueIris]

38. Can't believe I answered this poll.

Considering that it's almost too painful for me to watch the series now--that's how bad it sucks. Goddamn Republican writers.

[tavalon]

57. What season did it get bad?

I've watched three seasons and the fourth season just came out yesterday.

[yvr girl]

39. I was busy on Wednesday night for awhile and couldn't watch the show

My VCR wouldn't record sound. I taped the show anyway and watched it with the close captioning on. I love the show that much.

[dsc]

40. The first time Josh met Joey

He has no idea she is deaf and is hung over so he sees some guy saying he is Joey and then saying he isn't. Very funny.

I also loved the Dr. Laura moment.

[salminen]

41. My mom's suggestion for the next season

You know how they're having an election right now on the show, right? My mom is hoping the Republican candidate wins, and that the next seasons are all about an evil Republican administration browbeating the public into submission to their corporate profittering policies with shallow, catchy slogans.. LOL

[pres2032]

43. new funniest moment: Leo's interview of Ainsley Hayes

funniest damn conversation. Ainsley is nervous as hell and speaking overly dignified and Leo is just taking it all in, letting her give her passioned speech.
also, you can't beat leo saying, "you go girl."

[question everything]

44. When Donna found out she was a Canadian Citizen

was born in a tiny village in by the Canadian border, I think, and Abbey and Amy and CJ were all sitting getting drunk in an official WH affair, and then when it was time for the national anthem - the Maple Leaf came down in all its glory and the sounds of Oh Canada.

(I may not remember all the details, but it was delicious) and by then Donna found out that she was, after all, a U.S. citizen, to the chagrin of Abbey

[Lisa]

50. as a Canadian, I always thought ...

... that the people working on the show had put that part in as a way to thank Canada for taking in all those unexpected visitors on Sept. 11th. That, plus the op/ed that Stephen Jay Gould wrote for the major Canadian papers, meant far more to me than Bush forgetting (and later remembering) to thank us.

[WilliamPitt]

47. When Charlie rigs CJs desk to collapse

"So, how long do you usually make people your bitch?"

"Depends."

[deadparrot]

51. Charlie and the FLOTUS.

When she's giving Charlie the POTUS's medical results.

"You're blood pressure's normal...so we can start having sex again."

"You were talking about the president, r--"

"Go."

Paraphrasing...still, v. cute scene.

[ronzo]

52. Lord John...

Bartlet: The world is coming apart at the seams.
Marbury: Well, then--thank God you sent for me!

[kodi]

59. charlie tells leo he & zoey are going out: "are you bringing protection?"

and charlie looks at him and says "hey, leo!"

leo responds. "i meant the secret service charlie, but thanks for putting that image in my head."

many others, but margeret telling leo she can sign bartlett's name is over the top too...."we got checks and balances, and margeret vetoing bills and sending them back to congress" is a classic.