How many of the Ten Commandments have you Broken ?

[bettyellen]

I grew up in the RC church, eleven years in uniform. Even so, it took me and my two Irish Catholic reared buddies a while to list them all, let alone clearly remember how they had been defined for us way back then.
We are atheist, agnostic and buddhist now, but we all love jesus and no one's a hypocrite. We had a combined lifetime score of 26, because the atheist was always a bit of goody-goody and that dragged us down. According to the notes on this bar napkin, we're down to somewhere around 17 or 18 now that we have stopped being little shits, and we feel quite moral and really good about ourselves most of the time.
So, I'm wondering what would the nuns at Blessed Sacrament have to say about the life you've lived so far?


TEN COMMANDMENTS
(as we were taught by mean nuns in the last quarter of the 20th century)

I. Thou shalt have no other gods before me.
(this does mean being unable to sacrifice your child or SO's life to god, as well as watching football or playing x box instead of going to church)

II. Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven image.
(false idols, such as angelina jolie or brad pitt or your SO-- anybody who takes your mind off the love of god)

III. Thou shalt not take the name of the LORD thy God in vain.
(goddammit, in our RC church they insisted all swear words counted, but we think shit shouldn't count, not that it helps our score any)

IV. Remember the sabbath day, to keep it holy.
(no work at all, just worship every sunday, like clockwork, unless you're deathly ill)

V. Honour thy father and thy mother.
(this does include obeying them...were you ever a teenager?)

VI. Thou shalt not kill.
(luckily, we are applying this only to other humans here)

VII. Thou shalt not commit adultery.
(the nuns assured us this meant any and all pre- or extramarital sex, yes including sodomy, not just cheating)

VIII. Thou shalt not steal.
(were you ever a teenage girl?)

IX. Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbour.
(except for "no, your ass doesn't look fat in those", it all counts)

X. Thou shalt not covet any thing that is thy neighbour's.
(have you admired their husband, wife, big screen tv or bbq?)

[teach1st]

1. I made a graven image once...

...but I was tripping. Does that count?

[LynzM]

7. LMFAO

wow... :rofl:

[everythingsxen]

2. So I'm a fucking sinner you got a goddamn problem wit dat an I'll kill you

:evilgrin:

[bettyellen]

5. mr 9-10, i presume?

[everythingsxen]

8. Nah actually I am only a 7-9. 8 if you wanna be specific.

:evilgrin:

[bettyellen]

11. it's funny that a lot of people can't or won't give an exact count........

we polled a few folks and that kept happening.

[ClintonTyree]

3. Really.....

9-10, but I'm NOT telling you "how it went down". What good are commandments if you can't break them? They'll make more, I'm sure.

Besides, I saw what happened to the REST of the Commandments in that Mel Brooks movie. I might be up to 14 or so by now. :shrug:

[bettyellen]

10. you're nuts! N-V-T-S, nuts!!!

[JohnLocke]

4. Not my Ten Commandments!

"I am the Lord your God who brought you out of the land of Egypt..." - This commandment is to believe in the existence of God.
"You shall have no other gods besides Me...Do not make a sculpted image or any likeness of what is in the heavens above..."
"You shalt not swear falsely by the name of the Lord..." - This commandment is to never take the name of God in a vain oath. In Exodus, the text reads "in a vain oath" (ìà úùà àú ùí ä' ìùåà), while in Deuteronomy it reads "in a false oath" (ìà úùà ùí ä' ìù÷ø).
"Remember the Sabbath day and keep it holy" (the version in Deuteronomy mentions "Keep" rather than "Remember")
"Honor your father and your mother..." - This commandment is a development when compared to other laws of the Ancient East (e.g. Code of Hammurabi) that do not call for equal respect of the father and the mother.
"You shall not murder" - The Hebrew Bible makes a distinction between murdering and killing, and explicitly notes that murder is always a heinous sin, while killing is sometimes necessary, and in these cases just in the eyes of God. Thus, Jews take offense at translations which state "Thou shall not kill", which Jews hold to be immoral. Many Protestant and most Catholic Christians hold that this verse forbids abortion; in Judaism, this law is based on other sources.
"You shall not commit adultery"
"You shall not steal" (sometimes interpreted as kidnapping, since there are other injunctions against stealing property in the Bible).
"You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor"
"You shall not covet your neighbor's house..." (in Exodus, the text reads "... neighbour's house, ... neighbour's wife, nor his manservant..." etc. while in Deuteronomy, "thy neighbour's wife, ... thy neighbour's house, his field" etc.)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ten_Commandments#The_ten_statements

[bettyellen]

9. well my context was our roman catholic education from the 60's to 80's....

we weren't given a lot of the loopholes i've heard elsewhere.

[regnaD kciN]

48. Strange, then...

...that you reproduced the version of the "Ten Commandments" that is generally found in Protestantism, not Roman Catholicism. If you check an RC catechism or devotional manual, you'll generally find that they combine the first two ("no other gods before me" and "graven image") into one, move each of the next seven up one, and split the final one into two: "you shall not covet your neighbor's wife," and "you shall not covet your neighbor's goods."

This only highlights, of course, that the passage has more than ten commandments, but that they get combined to provide a nice even number. By the way, there are several other sets of "the Ten Commandments" in Torah, which are not all the same as the familiar ones in Exodus 20.

[JohnKleeb]

6. hmmmmmm probably all but thou shall not kill

I know I am a bad Christian but I try to be good to people and the way I see it, thats important too.

[bettyellen]

13. that's the most important thing.......

yes jeeter scored!!!!

[JohnKleeb]

14. Fuck that lol, its Jeter btw

Yeah it is, that I try to better the world and myself.

[bettyellen]

20. i was too excited, i'm hexing the sox....

[JohnKleeb]

24. If I had it my way

I would curse both the Yanks and the Sox. Bah, it sucks when your team hasnt tasted playoff glory.

[bettyellen]

28. yes it does, we got too jaded in ny......

we took it for granted. a lot of sox fans in nyc because of the dominican players. i'd go to sox games just to watch the fights in the stands.

[JohnKleeb]

29. Yeah which is why I have beefs with both the Yanks and Sox

I do hope history will remember the 0-3=4-3, my only regret is that it did not come against the orioles.

[bettyellen]

36. someday kleebster...

someday.

[JohnKleeb]

37. Me thinks Angelos will have to bite dust for the team to have a chance

[bettyellen]

45. okay, well remind me when thay play the O's and i'll see what i can do.

[JohnLocke]

23. It's "murder," not "kill."

"The Hebrew word is unambiguously murder; kill is a mistranslation. The Hebrew Bible makes a distinction between murdering and killing, and explicitly notes that murder is always a heinous sin, while killing is sometimes necessary, and in these cases just in the eyes of God. Thus, Jews take offense at translations which state "Thou shall not kill", which Jews hold to be a flawed interpretation, for there are circumstances in which one is required to kill, such as if killing is the only way to prevent one person from murdering another. Another case is killing in self-defense. (10)
Many Protestant and most Catholic Christians hold that this verse forbids abortion; Judaism does not see abortion as murder (c.f Ex. 21:22-23, and Rashi thereon), although Orthodox Judaism prohibits it in certain circumstances on other grounds."

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ten_commandments#Jewish_interpretation

[bettyellen]

30. okay, as i said before this is about our RC education.....

and the word they used was kill.

[WannaJumpMyScooter]

12. Gonna go wid 9-10, because of war

don't care what anyone says, killing... even "justified" killing sucks.

[bettyellen]

17. i'm sorry you were put it that position......no one should.

my dad was in ww2 and he had nightmares the rest of his life. loud ones.

[name not needed]

15. One left to be broken

[ScreamingMeemie]

16. Zero...I want it to be known...not 0-2...ZERO!

;) :hi:

[bettyellen]

18. bwaaaah. liar liar pants on fire.

[ghostsofgiants]

19. Haha, anyone else think of this site when they came in here?

http://www.wayofthemaster.com/

[bettyellen]

21. agggrrrgggh. my eyes!

[ghostsofgiants]

27. Hahaha...I consider it one of the funniest sites on the internet, myself..

But I understand the shock and horror you feel as well.

[SamanthaJones]

22. 7, which probably means I'm going to hell!

Yankees 3
Boston 1

Yeah boyeeeeeeee!

[bettyellen]

26. sammy! we're all going to hell, but the yankees are up.......

so we should find matcom and rub his nose in it.
since we're already going to hell.

[Magrittes Pipe]

25. I never killed anyone.

But I would if I had to. :shrug:

That's it. I got all the others down to a science.

[AlFrankenFan]

31. 8...and I'm 15

I'll give you a hint...I haven't a spouse/SO and I don't have blood on my hands.

[JohnKleeb]

32. Oh crap I forgot, I couldntt have commited adultery

Thanks AFF :) I forgot I was a loser ha.

[bettyellen]

35. any fornification will do, unless it's with the future mrs kleeb.

and oral counts too, they were quite specific. we were quite mortified.
the young and the damned.

[bettyellen]

34. you see, they told us all sex counted......unless you were married to

each other.
and in health class, they explained this includes blow jobs. they were aware some catholics were trying to squeak by with those.

[More Than A Feeling]

33. I haven't murdered anyone

:shrug:

[redsoxliberal]

38. 2... and I feel awful... #'s 4 & 9

[bettyellen]

39. you should feel awful-- but only because the sox suck!!!

[redsoxliberal]

41. Damn you!

[bettyellen]

42. damn me? i believe that's been done already, many times over.

[asthmaticeog]

40. I've broken 9 of 'em.

Give me any lip about it, and I'll gladly make it 10, punk. :P

[BBradley]

43. Broken 9, still break the first 5 as well as 10

[bettyellen]

44. contract killer? i loooved grosse point blank.......

[amazona]

46. think I'll take the 5th on that

However luckily as a Presbyterian we were assured very strongly that #9 to bear false witness ONLY pertained to committing perjury -- that is, lying under oath. Little white lies "no your ass doesn't look fat in that" were considered not only NOT sins but to be required by any young lady with a kind heart and good breeding who didn't want to crush the big-ass'd person's spirit.


Oh, and #3, yes, there were parents who tried to tell the kiddies that "all" swear words counted, but our ministers were adamant that taking the Lord's name in vain was the sin, not using a random combination of syllables. One youth minister stands out as memorable for assuring us that "shit" and "fuck" did not offend the Lord since he had nothing to do with these activities. The real swear was "Goddamn!"

The 70s. You gotta love 'em. Now "goddamn" is just another word.

The conservation movement is a breeding ground of communists
and other subversives. We intend to clean them out,
even if it means rounding up every birdwatcher in the country.
--John Mitchell, US Attorney General 1969-72

[bettyellen]

47. ha! the nuns always said that protestants only existed because they were

looking for loopholes. LOL.
i swear they said that you guys were only in it to get divorced, disrespect the virgin mary and loosen up the other commandments as much as possible.
some priests were a bit looser when you'd question them, but in class, they were old school all the way.

[WannaJumpMyScooter]

51. well, yeah... that is true, Luther was looking for a way to

be a normal human being rather than a dark-ages drone, so I guess that is a loophole.

[SarahB]

49. A few.

I don't much care anymore either. Being "good" never did me a heck of a lot of good anyway.

[SheWhoMustBeObeyed]

50. If you're pro-choice, you have broken #5

The nuns who taught me would say that, just because the blood isn't on your hands, doesn't mean you haven't killed. Don't we call Bush a killer because of the war dead? So the nuns would say of us who support a woman's right to choose.

We had really tough nuns who expanded "don't kill" to include spiritual killing. Like making fun of the class outcast (we called ours "Flipper"), bigotry against other races, or otherwise denying a person his/her humanity. Tough, tough nuns.

- 10 for 10

[ChickMagic]

52. I break the first 4 all the time

And the first one I break every day of my life. Oh, and the third one too. :P