What's up pussycat?

[yvr girl]

Tell me a story. Amuse me.

[reformedreformer]

1. There once was a cat named Creeper.......

who looked like a lot like a freeper.

[yvr girl]

2. Limericks at this time of night?

[reformedreformer]

3. What? No limmericks allowed this time of night?

Well, that cannot be right.

[yvr girl]

4. Feel free

I just won't be adding to them.

It would be better if they're dirty though.

[reformedreformer]

7. Your looking for dirty limmericks and puns?

Well then, what is that between your buns?

[Huckebein the Raven]

11. Alright

There was a young man from Wales
Whose yachting technique never fails.
He dines on baked beans
And plenty of greens,
And his farts put the wind in the sails.

:evilgrin:

you can get more here:

http://www.truebrits.tv/limericks.html

[reformedreformer]

5. Hi, I'm a newbie thats looking for fun.

I live in the pacific northwest without the sun.
It rains quite a bit don't you know
But HELL at least its not New York with 3 feet of snow.

[auntAgonist]

9. welcome to DU!!

:hi:

I'm the shy one :)

[reformedreformer]

13. Ahhh, the shy ones seem so coy and blush

Yet you express a playful "hush"

I bet you say things to all the guys.

And when you leave, you make them sigh..........

[yvr girl]

10. You're a newbie

And I'm leading you astray.

:hi:

[reformedreformer]

12. Ahhh, you try to lead me astray.......

but yet again I say......

There is nothing like a limmerick or pun

As long as everyone has some fun......

[auntAgonist]

6. Ray

A sex crazy robot named Ray
Had sex in the bathtub one day.
His circuits eroded,
His bollocks exploded.
And frightened his woman away.

[reformedreformer]

8. Old used rhymes do not work here young lady....

You must come up with your own like Sarah Brady....

[reformedreformer]

14. I'm sorry yvr girl for hyjacking your thread

I did not mean to run you off to bed

A story you wanted for that be sure

I will try and provide the cure.

[yvr girl]

15. quite alright

I just don't have any verse in me at the moment.

[reformedreformer]

16. You have a verse in you at this time

However, your inner self just doesn't what to rhyme.

The story I promised goes something like this
with a poor little boy asking for his first kiss.

The blonde little girl, she ran far away
and the little young boy just wanted to say

Your lips are like roses, your hair like gold
I'm sorry my brother said that you smelled like mold......

[yvr girl]

17. Your brother sounds like a prick

nothing personal

[reformedreformer]

18. It was the story that I provided to you my young lass

If you don't like the ending you can kiss my big.... Nah, I'm a newbie and don't want trouble just yet......:P :7

[yvr girl]

19. You're nothing until you get your first thread locked.

[reformedreformer]

20. Thread locked huh?

Maybe you could tell me a story about locking threads....

****Pulls up a chair and gets a beer******

You want anything to drink young lady? ;-)

[yvr girl]

21. I'm feeling festive - champaign

and don't try and sneak me any of that sparking wine crap.

Have you read the rules?

[reformedreformer]

22. I did just browse the "sex thread" stuff posted at the top

But since my arrival about 2-3 days ago, I haven't had a chance to look the whole board over.

[yvr girl]

24. There are lots of things that can get a thread locked

Bodily function threads (tasteless). You know, let's have a thread about farting.

Threads that have degenerated into flame wars.

Sex threads.

People asking for medical info. (I'm throwing up blood, anyone have a home remedy?)

[reformedreformer]

27. Well its a good thing that I don't do...

1. Farting or bodily function threads
2. Flame wars...Not that I have enough experience on internet boards to do that.
3. Sex threads....whats the purpose?
4. Since I'm not a doctor, that won't be any problem either.....

However, I do like to rhyme whenever I have the time And flirting online seems ok as long as it doesn't get away. Politics is something I share but only with people that want to care.

Your champaign is starting to look a little less full...Do you want me to top you off so you can tolerate my bull?

[reformedreformer]

23. ****** Passes down the champaign*********

served in the finest crystal for the first person to actually strike up a conversation with me too........

[yvr girl]

26. *sips* Be warned though - I'm a notorious flirt

but I can't flirt anymore - I made a vow.

[reformedreformer]

28. Ah, who is the skalleywag who made you give up the flirt

Any man like that is not worth the dirt.

[yvr girl]

30. It was more like a resolution

I just made my New Year's Resolution in March.

[reformedreformer]

31. A New Years Resolution that is 3 months to late.....

Is something that will be broken before your next date.


*****Pours more champaign into the young ladys glass*******

So tell me young lass, why did you give flirting up
Was trouble a brewing like hot tea in a cup?

[yvr girl]

33. Champaign goes straight to my head

Some said I flirted too much. I'm wearing glasses now - even though I don't need them - just so people will take me seriously.

[reformedreformer]

34. Nothing wrong with a young lady that flirts....

It's the ones who show you their skirts

That makes me wonder if they have a brain
But talking to you, I can tell you are sane.

[pauliedangerously]

25. There was once a Freep named Tard

Whose member couldn't get hard.
He was too much of a dingus
To perform cunnilingus
So Jeffie the Cannon
Was the one who got the day-card.


Is that how you get a thread locked? Or should I be more descriptive about bodily functions? Are they looking for verbs?

[reformedreformer]

29. Are you trying to intentionally torpedo this thread?

rhyming bad words here will come back to hit you in the head.

[pauliedangerously]

32. Well...

I've never really posted anything like that before...but I saw the thing about being nothing until you've gotten a thread locked and I never have--not to my knowledge anyway.

Sorry for the distasteful rhymes. Maybe I ought to break out my Dickinson collection to cleanse myself.

No offense intended.

[reformedreformer]

35. Dickenson, Shakespear and Twain

All my friend can cleanse the brain.

For it was told that thier writings will inccur thought
One must search the brain for what they have taught.

[pauliedangerously]

36. It seems I failed the test

But my words were in jest.
After reading this thread
I'm inspired instead;
So to you, my friend
Best wishes I send.

[reformedreformer]

38. There was not test in my rhyming tonight

Just some new friends who cant rhyme just right.

Best wishes to you I send also tonight
Keep the pen clean and be willing to write.

A masculine man with words like a dove
will always swoon those women who he loves.

[pauliedangerously]

39. That was nice...

Warm feelings received and warm feelings returned.

[reformedreformer]

37. Well, it appears I have run this thread dry.....

It is time for bed and me to say goodbye..

I love this place that you all call DU
Since I've been to other places that stink like poo...

I'll see you all again sometime real soon
And maybe you too can rhyme like this loon.

I promise in other threads that I join or engage
I won't rhyme to badly because that will enrage.

So again thank you yvr girl for talking to me
It makes me feel warm and buzz like a bee.