Please share some of the weird expressions your parents use

[yvr girl]

I saw some candy in a store today, and my father's words went through my head:

Candy is dandy, but sex won't rot your teeth.

[Nitrogenica]

1. My dad made up swear words. "Christ Balls!" was my fave.

[Wat_Tyler]

2. My mother would spell the most striking obscenities when playing Scrabble.

[HeeBGBz]

3. That gripes my nanny goat

From my grandmother translated means "that pisses me off"

[unblock]

4. i still haven't figured out exactly what a "purple funk" is....

[jpgray]

5. Here's one

[Lydia Leftcoast]

6. My mother, who was born in the 1920s uses expressions such as

"See you in the funnies" (as a lighthearted goodbye)

"Good night, sleep tight, don't let the bedbugs bite."

My father, who was born in 1911, used expressions such as

"That's the cat's pajamas" (translation: That's really good.)

[achtung_circus]

7. A couple from my Dad,

both, oddly, incorporating racoons.

1) He's lazier than a pet coon.

2) He's not worth a pinch of coonshit in the Bay of Fundy.

[Sporadicus]

8. 'Shit Fire & Save Matches!'

from my mother, born 1917.

[Minimus]

9. A couple of my Dad's favorites:

"He's got a personality like a bent trash can"

"I'm busier than a one legged man in an ass kickin contest"

[asjr]

10. "He's as tight as Dick's hatband." "He's drunker than

Cootie Brown." "Colder than a witch's tit."