I'm Selling My SOUL! What'll You Give Me For It? Any Takers?

[Beetwasher]

Start the bidding.

Also, ideas on how I'd transfer it to you would be greatly appreciated.

Where's Satan when you need him?

[MrModerate]

1. Sorry, they cancelled my Paypal account. n/t

[Modem Butterfly]

2. I've sold my soul about half a dozen times

Once for a hazelnut latte. Yum.

[Beetwasher]

3. This Is My First Time, Any Pointers?

Mmmm, Hazel Nuts...

How do you get away w/ selling it more than once? Does it regenerate or something?

[Modem Butterfly]

7. Silly! There's no such thing as a soul

That's just something adults made up to scare kids into acting good, like Michael Jackson or the Boogeman. So you can sell it all you want, or as often as you can. You get whatever goods and services you can, you'll generate profit, which is good for the economy, and the buyer will get either a sense of smug superiority or brownie points with their god, so everyone wins!

As for selling your soul in a buyer's market, I've always found that such transactions are best completed face-to-face. The most interested buyers are either the fervently religious, your friends who think you're kidding, and guys who want to get into your pants, all of whom will be most interested in seeing your face when you hand over your soul. It's less satisfying when you make an on-line transaction.

[Beetwasher]

8. *gasp*

Heathen! :evilgrin:

Ummm, does selling your soul work to get into someone's pants? Or vice versa? ;-)

[Modem Butterfly]

12. Not when all you get is a freaking flavored latte it doesn't!

:evilgrin:

[Beer Snob-50]

19. It has worked before.

I got into a girls knickers when I was young by selling my soul. I got it back when I discovered she was not that good!!!

[Az]

10. But think of the mark up if

he ever shifts to a belief system that includes the concept of a soul. Muwahahaha.

[trogdor]

4. Two Marv Throneberrys and a Gil Hodges.

I might even throw in an Ed Kranepool rookie card.

[Beetwasher]

16. So Far, You're The Top Bidder!

n/t

[kiraboo]

5. LMAO. You know,

the market is flooded right now. You're gonna have trouble unloading it!

[On the Road]

6. I'll Give You a Mess of Pottage!

No seriously, my question is:

If I buy your soul, what do *I* get out of it?

[Beetwasher]

11. LOL!

Hmmm, another poster offered me baseball cards, so, sorry, pottage won't cut it! Back of the line!

I suppose what you get is my soul and you get to do all sorts of depraved things to it, if that's your thing!

[Blue-Jay]

9. Will you spray some "new car" scent on it first?

[Beetwasher]

15. Doesn't Really Need It, It's As Good As New!

And it comes with it's very unique odor which I'm sure you'll enjoy...It's a potpouri of scents including tequila, fine cannabis, transmission fluid and a hint cumin, among others...

Ok, I'll throw the new car scent in there too if your offers good...

[MsAnthropy]

13. Satan only buys Republican souls

and he's WAY over-stocked.

[egoprofit]

14. i just bought a meal at chik-fil-a, i'll trade you...

[Beetwasher]

17. What Is It?

n/t

[egoprofit]

20. it's the nugget meal with slaw and bbq sauce...

dr pepper included!!

[Beetwasher]

21. Hmmm, Someone Offered Some Baseball Cards

I like that offer better. Back of the line!

[egoprofit]

22. your loss... chik-fil-a has the best chicken in the world.

n/t

[El Fuego]

18. I'll give you the presidency like I did with the last guy! - SATAN

:evilgrin:

[Cadence]

23. I will give you a marshmallow peep.

And to transfer it to me we will need to call on Peep Jesus.

[hfojvt]

24. Once my room-mate was trying to memorize this poem:

I think my soul is a tame old duck
wandering around in the barnyard muck
fat and lazy with useless wings
but sometimes when the north wind sings
and the wild one hurtle overhead
he remembers something lost and dead
and cocks a wary, bewildered eye
and makes a feeble attempt to fly
he's fairly content with the state he's in
but he's not the duck he might have been.

Anyway, after several failed attempts at recitation, he finally said "I once knew a lame old duck, who sold his soul for one good ..."

So I would hold out for that, or at least stock options.