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Longgrain Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-05-05 10:19 PM
Original message
How many of you stupids want to get married?
Is it just me? There's no singles life where I am! I never meet neat people, ever!

When I do, they're just not interested...

Sorry, I'm just in a funky mood tonight...:)
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jellybelly Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-05-05 10:21 PM
Response to Original message
1. me....
Don't know why...I never want kids though:puke:
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Longgrain Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-05-05 10:23 PM
Response to Reply #1
3. That's too bad to hear...
You're young, I'm at that age when I want to have kids...

Get back to me when you reach 30...
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jellybelly Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-05-05 10:26 PM
Response to Reply #3
7. I thought men didn't have biological clocks
:) I'm sure I'll never change my mind about having kids...I've felt this way since I was 11 years old.
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fluffernutter Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-05-05 10:29 PM
Response to Reply #7
9. why? is there a reason, or
is it just a feeling you have about rotton lil rugrats? ;)
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jellybelly Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-05-05 10:31 PM
Response to Reply #9
11. I have three younger siblings
PERIOD:P
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fluffernutter Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-05-05 10:38 PM
Response to Reply #11
19. me too!
i swear we are twins.
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jellybelly Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-05-05 10:40 PM
Response to Reply #19
21. that is just weird....
:crazy:

but do you want (or have) kids? :scared:
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Longgrain Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-05-05 11:10 PM
Response to Reply #21
30. Hey jelly...
just thought I'd chime in a bit...

I think once you get older and more mature you'll understand the entire kids thing...
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jellybelly Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-05-05 11:13 PM
Response to Reply #30
32. I doubt it...
I want to be free. I like my space...I don't even like best friends or boyfriends getting too attached to me. I tend to push people away...couldn't push kids away though...or maybe I could, but I don't want to serve jailtime.}(
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Longgrain Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-05-05 11:16 PM
Response to Reply #32
35. I know you're young...
I'm glad you wouldn't "push" kids away from you...I think kids are great...

It's just I've known people, like my sister and her husband, who want to have kids, but can't...

Plus I known too many people who ended up having kids (my last girlfriend for example) who didn't want them...

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jellybelly Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-05-05 11:29 PM
Response to Reply #35
38. That's sad
and you wants kids but you're waiting for the right woman...
I know kids are a blessing but they take away too much time and freedom...There's more to live for...wiping baby's bottoms and hearing them scream constantly would kill me...I'm a babyophobe:shrug:

I hope you have kids one day, you deserve to be happy:hug:
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Longgrain Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-05-05 11:43 PM
Response to Reply #38
40. Thanks baby jelly...
:hug:
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liontamer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-06-05 06:16 PM
Response to Reply #30
61. why?
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trof Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-06-05 06:35 PM
Response to Reply #7
63. We do.
Or something like it.
I fled girlfriends at the hint of the drop of a hint about a "relationship" until my late 20s, and then...I was ready.
It'll be 36 years of (mostly) wedded bliss next April.
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catzies Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-06-05 06:38 PM
Response to Reply #7
65. Oh yes they do! Last 3 guys I dated all were ready to have kids right away
And all 3 of them dumped me because I didn't want to have any more.
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ekhunter Donating Member (118 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-06-05 06:38 PM
Response to Reply #1
64. i didn't want kids either when i was younger. i have had two kids
since then and can't imagine my life without them. my life revolves around my kids now and i wouldn't want it any other way.
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LDS Jock Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-05-05 10:22 PM
Response to Original message
2. I'd like to get married
I don't want kids either. I'm OK being single but would love to have a partner to share life with. I'm not desperate enough to find someone just because I'm afraid of being alone though.
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brainshrub Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-05-05 10:23 PM
Response to Original message
4. Me. But I'm straight.
But wait... the homosexual agenda just got a hold of me, and now I feel compelled to marry the first gay man I see.
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Longgrain Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-05-05 10:25 PM
Response to Reply #4
5. I'm a lesbian myself...
tho I'm the only one who knows it...:)
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EstimatedProphet Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-05-05 10:25 PM
Response to Original message
6. Planning on it
Because I've met someone that's right for me. Forget the dating crap.
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Longgrain Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-05-05 10:30 PM
Response to Reply #6
10. I met only two women in the last few years
Edited on Wed Jan-05-05 10:49 PM by Longgrain
who I felt were right for me...one was living with my brother, so she was wayyy off limits (Tho we did become great friends) the other was a young single mother who I had high hopes for starting a long term relationship with...only she wasn't interested....(LOOOOOOOOOOOOONG story)...

I'm just trying to figure out where are all the single gals in my area? :shrug:
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EstimatedProphet Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-05-05 10:34 PM
Response to Reply #10
15. Tough one
I used to meet a lot of women, but very few would give me the time of day, and a great many of them were, for lack of a better term, "socially retarded". I have a partner now that matches me in so many ways that people call us two peas in a pod. I'm not giving her up.
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liberalhistorian Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-05-05 10:40 PM
Response to Reply #6
20. "Dating crap",
indeed, that's a good way of putting it. Singlesland is a dog-eat-dog world, especially if you're a woman and ESPECIALLY if you're 40 or older; I don't think married people have any idea of just how difficult dating really is. SIGH.
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Longgrain Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-05-05 10:48 PM
Response to Reply #20
23. I feel for you sooo much!
And it's not just women either who have this problem...

I hate parties and bars...if I go I'm usually the only single guy there...

If there are single women around, they're usually not of the type interested in a long term relationship...


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liberalhistorian Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-05-05 10:51 PM
Response to Reply #23
26. I know, I don't like bars either,
I don't drink all that much and I've never liked the bar atmosphere. That doesn't mean I can't get wild and have fun, though, lol!
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Longgrain Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-05-05 10:59 PM
Response to Reply #26
28. Here! Here!
I prefer to get to know a woman, or people in general, on a one to one basis. Small groups, a few close friends...which is how I met my last girlfriend...

But she was about 7 years younger than me, and still into the party scene... weird...
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liberalhistorian Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-05-05 11:09 PM
Response to Reply #28
29. So, what
happened with her? And didn't she like your fireplace (I know I do, if the picture you posted is really your fireplace, that is!) :evilgrin: :bounce: :bounce: :bounce:
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Longgrain Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-05-05 11:23 PM
Response to Reply #29
36. Seriously?
She lived about thirty miles south of me, a bit of a drive for either of us if we wanted to meet.

Plus I really only got to see her three days a week...Suterdays, Sundays and Thursdays...

She called me her Thursday Boy...

Naively, I found out, there was also a Wednesdays Boy...

Sigh...

To cheer me up a bit, yes this is my fire place...



It gets cold up here in New England this time of the year...

:-)
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sendero Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-05-05 10:28 PM
Response to Original message
8. Marriage is incredible...
... but only if you find the right person :)

Don't buy that "marriage is a lot of work" crap - if it is - you married the wrong woman!
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Longgrain Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-05-05 10:32 PM
Response to Reply #8
12. Nearly all my friends are female...
and I'm straight, so go figure?

If friendship is synonymous with--"making it work"...I'm a seasoned pro already...
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sendero Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-05-05 10:46 PM
Response to Reply #12
22. When it comes to the opposite sex.
... "friendship" is the enemy of "love".

If you want love you have to save the friendship until after you have it. Otherwise you will never get it.
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Longgrain Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-05-05 10:55 PM
Response to Reply #22
27. I think I understand what you mean...
I just can't even begin to find the "love" to begin with.

The friendship would become automatic/ later as you say...

I have no doubt that the friendship part of the relationship can/ will happen...I'm just looking to get the love part kick-started...
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SOteric Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-05-05 10:33 PM
Response to Original message
13. Are you begging the question a little here?
'Cause if you're looking for valid answers you might want to rephrase. On the other hand, if you're just trying to kickstart a conversation...

P.S. Not into marriage myself, but that doesn't mean I don't value long term love affairs with particularly wonderful men.
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Maddy McCall Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-05-05 10:34 PM
Response to Reply #13
16. I second your PS.
:)
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Maddy McCall Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-05-05 10:33 PM
Response to Original message
14. Not me, no sirree! I did it thirteen years ago...
was married to an abuser, and I like being alone and having "companionship" when I want it. I wouldn't mind having a permanent companion, but I will NEVER get married again.
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Lady Effingbroke Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-05-05 10:37 PM
Response to Original message
17. I used to think I did, now I don't care.
meh...:shrug:
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liberalhistorian Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-05-05 10:37 PM
Response to Original message
18. I'd like to be married someday,
but it has to be with the right person. I'd much rather be single forever than marry the wrong person just to be married. God knows where that right person is, and I'm beginning to wonder if he's even out there at all, but if it's meant to happen it probably will. If it isn't, then I'll still have a full life.

You have to be content being single and be secure and happy with yourself before you can have a successful relationship, you can't depend on someone else for all your happiness, security, and emotional needs.

But I would, indeed, love to experience that kind of love someday, I hope it happens.
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RC Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-05-05 10:49 PM
Response to Original message
24. Yeah, me.
The problem is finding someone who has not been corrupted by being in a bad marriage for 20 years.

It usually takes about two years to find out. Two years wasted. Some women are really good at hiding the corruption.
I've done my healing and am still working on it. Why can't others admit they have a problem and work on themselves also?
There are a lot of nice facades out there. I am still looking for the real thing that is also available. Not easy around here.
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Digit Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-05-05 10:49 PM
Response to Original message
25. I lose too many tools when I divorce
Plus I almost lost my rental property from co-mingling the rents!
I did not know it made it marital property.
Companions are great, legal entanglements...BAD!
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Cadence Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-05-05 11:12 PM
Response to Original message
31. I'm a stupid that wants to get married.
I admit it. :shrug:
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Longgrain Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-05-05 11:27 PM
Response to Reply #31
37. Summit you application to:
Longgrain

P.O. Id,LYK2m8tu...

Underground, DU, U.S.A.
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GOPisEvil Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-05-05 11:13 PM
Response to Original message
33. If I meet the right woman, I'd love to get married.
If I never meet her, I'd rather be alone. :-)
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Amaya Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-05-05 11:15 PM
Response to Original message
34. Not me
been there, done that
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Bouncy Ball Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-05-05 11:30 PM
Response to Original message
39. Calling us "you stupids" made me laugh, though.
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Longgrain Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-05-05 11:49 PM
Response to Reply #39
42. It was a copycat title...
but one with serious intent...
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tjdee Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-05-05 11:46 PM
Response to Original message
41. I'd like to be with the right guy. Marriage is irrelevant--but I do like
perty dresses.

So if we went places where I could dress up lots, that'd be fine.

But...to me marriage has always been a sign that one person loves the other enough to want to make it legal/binding/for real. I'm trying to ween myself of that, but it's a lingering thought.
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FuzzySlippers Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-05-05 11:57 PM
Response to Original message
43. Get that book outta your nose
then maybe we can talk.:P
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Longgrain Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-06-05 12:03 AM
Response to Reply #43
44. PhuPPPPFTTTTTTTTTTT!!!!
:P

I just so happen to like books!!!

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jellybelly Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-06-05 12:04 AM
Response to Reply #44
45. and the books don't appear to have been in your nose
:P
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Longgrain Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-06-05 12:12 AM
Response to Reply #45
47. You're just a kid!
What do you know...

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jellybelly Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-06-05 12:13 AM
Response to Reply #47
48. so they were in your nose?
:shrug:

:*
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Longgrain Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-06-05 12:20 AM
Response to Reply #48
51. Way up there...
Self portriat...

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jellybelly Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-06-05 12:23 AM
Response to Reply #51
54. very cute
;-)
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Longgrain Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-06-05 12:34 AM
Response to Reply #54
56. Like me?
;-)
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jellybelly Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-06-05 12:37 AM
Response to Reply #56
58. yes....
:* :thumbsup:
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FuzzySlippers Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-06-05 12:11 AM
Response to Reply #44
46. You know, I'm probably violating DU rules
following you around with that taunt. You should put me on alert.:D

BTW, them's some really nice books. Don't want to stick them up your nose.:P
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Longgrain Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-06-05 12:17 AM
Response to Reply #46
49. Follow me around!!!!
Every shred of admiration is appreciated...

Here's another recent picture of myshelf in order to tide you DU ladies over...








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FuzzySlippers Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-06-05 12:19 AM
Response to Reply #49
50. Ooooooh.....are those leather bound?
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Longgrain Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-06-05 12:22 AM
Response to Reply #50
53. Wrapped up in pure sheep skin
;)
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Medium Baby Jesus Donating Member (592 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-06-05 06:51 PM
Response to Reply #49
66. One word: Swifter
:)
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koneko Donating Member (628 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-06-05 12:21 AM
Response to Original message
52. Jaded, but hopeful
I would love to think that one of these days, I'll meet someone worthy of that kind of commitment.

I am convinced that the quality men in my age range are already married. Someday.

At the same time, though, I do like spending time with me, so I'm in no rush to worry about it too much. (Is that bad for a 34 y.o. woman?)
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Longgrain Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-06-05 12:27 AM
Response to Reply #52
55. Seriously...
Edited on Thu Jan-06-05 12:35 AM by Longgrain
Since I've gotten kind of silly with a few of the other posters...I am seriously trying to get a "Singles" group going here on DU...

more info can be found here...

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=120x26336
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koneko Donating Member (628 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-06-05 12:36 AM
Response to Reply #55
57. Sounds like a great idea
Thanks for taking the initiative!
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SarahB Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-06-05 06:12 PM
Response to Original message
59. Spent my entire adult life married.
Been married since I was 19- now almost 33. I spent the better part of the past year putting things in place to get out of the one in which I've spent half of rather miserable. I don't need to be married to have a relationship- short term or long term. I don't need any "official" sanction from anyone else (church, government) for my relationships. Maybe I'd change my tune a few years down the road, but at this point, marriage to me feels like imprisonment.
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the Princess Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-06-05 06:14 PM
Response to Original message
60. Marriage is a wonderful institution
But who wants to live in an institution????????

Badum bum ching!

But seriously folks:

Marriage has good points and bad points. Choose wisely grasshopper.
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Nikia Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jan-06-05 06:30 PM
Response to Original message
62. My husband and I were happy to marry
My inlaws said that we shouldn't have married young because they had fun dating different people throughout their 20s. We married when we were both 22, after being together for 3 years. My husband and I are both introverts, who don't hate people, preferring strong close relationships to many aquaintances. I dated more than my husband did, but we both hated dating. It either seemed pointless or hurtful.
If something happened to my husband or marriage, I don't think that I would be excited about getting back in the game again or anything. I still think dating is usually pointless or hurtful.
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