How to tell if you are living in a red or blue state

[Mari333]

Blue States: Home of good schools
Red States: Homeskooled good

Blue States: Want a big tent for their Party.
Red States: Wears a big tent to her party.

Blue States: Favor electric cars
Red States: Favor electric chairs

Blue States: Concerned about ballooning deficits' effect on capital markets turning gains into thin air
Red States: Concerned about whether it's demons that make balloons float in thin air

Blue States: Dream of making enough money to kite and swim with Czechs in Biarritz
Red States: Dream of kiting enough checks to swim in Schlitz

Blue States: Favor institutionalized health care for the poor
Red States: Favor institutionalizing the poor

Blue States: After the 9/11 attacks, put coffins in the ground
Red States: After the 9/11 attacks, put magnetic flags on the car

Blue States: Forget that God did not give Adam a Steve
Red States: Forget that not only did God give Abraham three wives, He gave Solomon 300 concubines

Blue States: Enormous cities that serve as the engines of human progress
Red States: Enormous Hummers that serve as the engines for Arab oil

Blue States: Provide the "tax" part of "tax and spend"
Red States: Provide the "spend on a new 8-lane highway to link a Wal-Mart to the Olive Garden"
part of "tax and spend"


Blue States: Believe we're all brothers and sisters under the skin.
Red States: Don't mind if we're brothers and sisters under the sheets.

Blue States: Fighting to clean up skid row
Red States: Fighting to clean up skid marks

Blue States: Concerned about global warming
Red States: Don't like to travel and are too fat to fit in an airline seat anyway, so glad to hear that the tropics are coming to Texas. Yee-haw!

Blue States: Follow Jesus, but doesn't believe in Him
Red States: Believe in Jesus, but doesn't follow Him

Blue States: Want to repeal the Patriot Act
Red States: Want to repeal the Emancipation Proclamation

Blue States: Looking for a method to weaken China every day
Red States: Sold everyday china for a weekend of meth

Blue States: Favor drafting annoying laws on assault rifles
Red States: Assault annoying in-laws with rifles after being drafted

Blue States: Want the right for everyone to worship as they choose
Red States: Want the right to choose everyone's worship

Blue States: Champion women wrestling with the right to choose
Red States: Choose women's wrestling championships

Blue States: Want a rational energy policy
Red States: Want policy of energetic irrationalism

Blue States: Used benefits to assist victims on account of attacks
Red States: Used attacks to benefit Toby Keith's bank account

Blue States: Watched friends in New York die in foxy attacks on America
Red States: Attack New York on Fox for not being friends of America

Blue States: Believe God loves us and gave everyone free will to be different
Red States: Believe God willed us to freely hate everyone different

Blue States: Believe absence makes the heart grow fonder
Red States: Believe abstinence saves the tart from plunder

Blue States: Believe in Mr. Darwin's theory of "Evolution"
Red States: Believe in Mr. Jesus' "Talking Snake" theory

Blue States: Slave to pay inheritance taxes
Red States: Inherited slaves

Blue States: Buy art
Red States: Collect Beanie Babies

[LDS Jock]

1. red state bashing and stereotyping never gets old to some, does it?

[Mari333]

3. oh lighten up

my whole family lives in Indiana...which is why I dont.

[LDS Jock]

5. why should I lighten up?

I don't come here to have my home area and family bashed. After the election, post after post did it. I thought that had past, and now more bashing on this thread.

If Dems do want to make progress in the red states, they need to stop looking down on them and making fun of them and their lives. No one is receptive to a message from someone who looks down on them.

[donheld]

9. You being from Blood Red Texas better develop a thicker skin

I'm from Red Colorado and i have no problem bashing my state.

[LDS Jock]

11. My skin is thick enough

I can take it from people who don't know better, but I would expect more from the people on this site than nasty stereotypes.

[donheld]

12. Stereotypes

that's why your's and my states are so bloody red. Many of those items mentioned above are spot on. No need to make excuses, that does us no good.

[LDS Jock]

14. lets see how accurate they are

homeskooled.. I don't have percentages, but I'm sure the vast majority still use school systems, either public or private

a tent to a party, referring to KKK, I don't think that is typical either

electric cars to electric chairs. yes, death penalty is done here, but not to the same percentage of electric cars in blue states, which is negligible

demons make balloons float.. I know of no one who believes that. It is just making fun of someone's religion

institutionalizing the poor. where is that from? just slamming on a group

people buried soldiers here too, not just slap a magnetic sticker on the SUV

selective Christianity is a nationwide occurrence, not just a red state

brothers and sisters under the sheets.. again, this is so old. anyone know of a case of a brother and sister couple? only one I can think of is Angelina Jolie making out with her brother and that was in LA.

cleaning up skid marks.. so, I presume that means we all are unable or just too stupid to be able to wipe our ass after defecating. lovely

too fat to fit in an airline seat.. spot on? where are the facts to support all southerners are fat asses and blue staters are slim jim?

repeating selective Christianity argument. again, that is nationwide

red staters want slavery to return... please.. is this one of the points you claim is "spot on"?

drug users.. again, is this only in red states? I think not

the old gun argument.. that is not an exclusive turf of red states. yes, stronger in red, but nationwide people think they need all kinds of weapons.

Believe God willed us to freely hate everyone different...hmmm.. isn't this what you are using the post to do? hate those who are different

talking snake theory.. again, Christians are nationwide and making fun of them for something dear to their hearts will never bring them to your side

inherited slaves.. now just who do you know inheriting slaves these days?

[Zuni]

17. I'm with you. Making fun of christians will not win us votes

it will only offend people

[donheld]

18. Making excuses for them will do no good either

nt

[Left Is Write]

19. On the wearing a tent to her party -

I believe that was a fat joke.

[donheld]

26. give me a break

Homeskooled. - I'd bet more red state kids are home schooled than blue states by far.

Wears a tent. - I'm sure there are more Klan organizations in red states than blue

Concerned about whether it's demons that make balloons float in thin air - Im sure more Red staters are worried about demons/Harry Potter than Blue states.

Favor institutionalizing the poor - you wanna bet?

After the 9/11 attacks, put magnetic flags on the car - Only red state to really put bodies in the ground due to 911 was Virginia

Blue States: Forget that God did not give Adam a Steve
Red States: Forget that not only did God give Abraham three wives, He gave Solomon 300 concubines - Yea pretty much the red states care more about terrifying gay's that blue states.

Enormous Hummers that serve as the engines for Arab oil - Yea here too, Except for Ruby Red Ahnuld in Kalee fornia

"spend on a new 8-lane highway to link a Wal-Mart to the Olive Garden"
part of "tax and spend" - Yea you know why Red state governor Owens didn't like the idea of spending more money for light rail? yea Highways were his answer.

Fighting to clean up skid marks - this is not about underwear it's about NASCAR skid marks. NASCAR bigger in red states no doubt.

Don't like to travel and are too fat to fit in an airline seat anyway, so glad to hear that the tropics are coming to Texas. Yee-haw! - Those red state bible beaters think Jesus will come back and save them from global warming.

Blue States: Follow Jesus, but doesn't believe in Him
Red States: Believe in Jesus, but doesn't follow Him - Spot on spot on spot on.

Want to repeal the Emancipation Proclamation - you bet they do and add homophobia to it.

Want the right to choose everyone's worship - ask Falwell, Robertson, Graham, Dobson of course they do.

let me know if you want me to go on, i can.

[drdon326]

15. ditto

.

[Nicole]

22. Bashing is easy when you have the majority

here backing you up.

Those of us living in red states not only have to fight the majority at home, we have to fight the majority of our party on DU. How fun is that!

[Momgonepostal]

13. Did you move or do you not want people to know you're from TX?

:-)

[LDS Jock]

16. I changed my user name to match the one I use elsewhere

I still live in Austin. I don't care who knows it. I used to lurk here under ldsjock but waited around too long and forgot my password, and no longer had access to the old email account. That is why I changed it, but use a space with it now.

[Fenris]

2. Ouch. That's pretty spot on.

;)

[havocmom]

6. No, it's pretty damned bigoted

and is the sort of thing which will not win us friends.

[LDS Jock]

7. thank you..

I'm glad someone else can see this for what it is. We should be above this here.

[Left Is Write]

20. Well, no, it's not really.

It's an exaggeration meant to be funny. I wouldn't say it's "spot on".

[Deja Q]

4. ROTFLMAO!

Thanks for the giggles. :D

[drdon326]

8. "Believe in Mr. Jesus' "Talking Snake" theory "..BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA

.

[drdon326]

10. Mari...I'm bookmarking this... I cant stop laughing.

.

[Laelth]

21. Ahem ...

When was the last time you heard Repukes wondering about whether or not what they were saying was winning them friends? When do they worry about offending liberals?

How much longer are we gonna roll over?

The post is spot-on. Call a spade a spade!

-Laelth

[Catchawave]

23. Maybe the more sensitive members....

shouldn't be visiting the "lounge" ? I thought it was pretty funny myself. I'm a blue gal in a red state, bring more of this on!!!!

[LDS Jock]

24. and maybe the insensitive people should stop trying to piss off people

every chance they get. You know, maybe I am in the wrong place. I thought I was someone where individuals were respected, not looked down on. Somewhere we reached out to those different than us so we could work together, not slammed and pushed further away.

[Catchawave]

25. But your sig line contains....

..something about voting republican, God kills a kitten? Maybe it's me that doesn't get it? Cuz, tasteless as that is, I thought it was funny too ????

[NoPasaran]

27. Electric chair?

Pardon me, it's lethal injection. We ain't no backward hillbillies.