Signs you're about to be fired

[HEyHEY]

This was on the apple live page or whatever.... but look at these "clues" could they be any more obvious? What kind of uncreative fuck came up with this shit? I like number 9 the best, yeah, they've told EVERYONE except you you're gonna be canned.


1 You are asked to compile a report on all your ongoing projects.
2 You are pushed hard to finish one or two specific projects.
3 You are encouraged not to do your usual long-term planning.
4 You're neither informed of nor invited to meetings.
5 You receive a critical review for the first time.
6 Your expense reports are questioned.
7 Your typical expenditures are criticized.
8 Your direct superior keeps his or her distance from you.
9 Conversation stops when you enter a room.
10 You have a vague sense of unease.

[WilliamPitt]

1. 10 You have a vague sense of unease.

But maybe you're just...insane.

[HEyHEY]

2. haha

Yeah, did they just throw that one in for fun?

[Surf Cowboy]

4. You find that your impromptu

"Puppetry of the Penis" show at the company picnic was not the breakaway hit you expected...

[HEyHEY]

6. exactly

Especially that trick with the coleslaw

[Maddy McCall]

7. HAHAHAHA!!!

[VelmaD]

17. Given that we all have a "vague sense of unease"...

I think they throw that one in to keep us all perpetually worried that we're next. *sigh*

[Surf Cowboy]

3. It's 7:00 a.m. Saturday morning

and you roll over to find the boss's wife next to you in bed.

[VoteDemocratic2004]

5. Conversation always stops when I enter a room

People wouldn't have anything to talk about if it wasn't for me. LOL

[DS1]

9. what doesn't that surprise me

:hi:

[GOPisEvil]

8. Oh shit!

*gets resume updated*

[HEyHEY]

10. OH, did they tell you not to worry about longterm planning?

You: "I've got a great idea I think would really fly in September"
Boss: "Don't worry about it."

Yeah right eh? :eyes:

[GOPisEvil]

11. Actually, my evaluation is due...

:scared:

[HEyHEY]

13. show up to work naked the week before

then on the eval day wear clothes - tell them you're putting in the effort

[iconoclastic cat]

12. Excuse me, Mr. Bush? Could you please write up all your ongoing projects?

And don't worry about that RNC platform.

[HEyHEY]

14. haha

AS well, we'd like to go over some of your "travel" expenses

[drumwolf]

15. and while we're on the subject of expenses, Mr. Bush....

We'd also like to go over your "pharmaceutical expenses" as well.... :evilgrin:

[Merrick]

16. 11. When your boss...

comes to your cubicle and shouts, "Get the fuck outta here!"

[Surf Cowboy]

18. That nasty rash just won't clear up...

[Surf Cowboy]

19. On a drunken bet,

you knocked up your boss' teenage daugher...

[VoteDemocratic2004]

21. That's sick

Real sick!

[Surf Cowboy]

20. You parked the company car

in a roadside ditch at 4:00 a.m. on a Thursday...

[forgethell]

22. 4 & 10

are dead giveaways. How about, a big project is coming up and everyone knows what they are going to be doing but you??

[bearfan454]

23. How about when they meet you at the door with all your stuff

boxed up and say - Nothing personal, give me your badge Stevo.

[yellowcanine]

24. You find a stack of empty boxes sitting in your office Friday morning and

a note on your desk to report to your supervisor asap.