Will I be "Enlightened" after my 500th post?

[floridaguy]

I know it's a mere drop in the bucket for some of you,like Skinner and Youngred for instance. I'm coming up on this special moment, and I'm just trying to properly prepare myself and get an idea of what to expect. Do I need a cake? Will I be more attractive to the ladies after 500 posts, and then what happens at 1,000? Also, I expect the 1,500th visitor at my Beat Bush website today, and I guess I'm just a little giddy. You can help me reach the 1,500 mark by clicking on the link below.

Thanks DUers :toast: You've given me hope, and made me realize I wasn't the only one wondering what the f*ck is wrong with my country.

Don't worry America, Help is on the way!
:bounce::bounce::bounce::bounce::bounce:

[mrboba1]

1. no, you only become enlightened on the post #

after 699.

:P

[Droopy]

2. It works kind of like a casino

You get comps depending on how many posts you have. I do believe the reward for 500 is a specialized DU kitty litter pan. For 1000 you get a pair of specialized DU reading glasses because you'll need them by then for messing up your eyes because you've been staring at a computer screen too much.

[floridaguy]

5. Wow, my very own DU kitty litter pan!

Wait till I tell my friends. :bounce:
They will be so envious :eyes:

It does have the black & red DU logo on it, right?
Since I don't actually have a cat, or a kitten, are there any other suggested household uses for the pan?

[Buns_of_Fire]

7. Don't worry. After #600 we'll send you the cat to go with it.

Or maybe a dog. Hey, you plays the game, you takes your chances.

[Tandalayo_Scheisskopf]

3. Considering all my posts...

The total of which is a number I do not know and don't really care, I can say with assuredness that you simply become a lot dumber and sillier, until you enter that perfect state of only going into The Lounge. ;-)

DU Satori is its own reward.

[ScreamingMeemie]

4. I don't think so...

At least I don't think I am...well maybe...well wait..

Nope, definitely not. I'm still waiting. ;)

[No2W2004]

6. No, in the Lounge anyway,

it works backwards...you start out enlightened, and by 1000 post all you think of is kitties and smilies showing their ass.

[johnnie]

8. If you stay with the intelligent posts...

....you won't mean anything in here. If you have sexual innuendos, overly politically correct posts, talk about cats, ask about your mental health, talk about tits and ass or kiss ass to the 25-30 people who are "the hip ones"..you'll be dandy, if not..then 500 is just another number. Otherwise, keep on a posting those posts. :)

[floridaguy]

10. Thanks Johnnie

It's always hard to determine the difference between sexual innuendo and tasteless sexism sometimes. Oh well, to err is human.

The Dolphins logo makes me sad :(
The fins will probably suck without Ricky. I probably won't make my annual pilgrimage to Underwear Stadium to watch the Dolphins kick the Patriots' ass.

Why the hell is pot a banned substance? It doesn't enhance performance. In fact, it probably slowed Ricky down a little, and gave the other guys a better chance to catch him.

[Dragon Turtle]

9. Between madness and enlightenment lies...

obsession...