to my DU conscience: did i cross a Line here?

[sniffa]

throughout the day i converse w/ my circLe of friends on emaiL (repLy aLL - we usuaLLy get some good strings going). one of our favorite passtimes is finding weird stories in the news that invoLve someone with the same Last/fuLL name of someone in the circLe.

anyhow, i read a story about a woman who had an unfortunate accident and Locked herseLf inside a storage space (for 16 hrs) untiL someone heard her cries and rescued her.

the procedure for these stories - send them out on the emaiL ring and rag on the intended target for being the person in the story or a reLative of the person in said story.

i hesitated today, thinking "shit, what if this is his mom?". so i just sent out the story and asked "is your mom ok?"... and it was his mom, so i'm gLad i didn't rag on him.

i just got a bunch of angry repLies (separateLy - they repLied onLy to me) from some of the others on the ring of what a no-cLass asshoLe i am (which normaLLy i'd agree) for that emaiL.

now i feeL horribLe. shouLd i?

[StopTheMorans]

1. This is your DU conscience here

get your hand out of your pants while you're typing on DU!

[Nicholas D Wolfwood]

2. No, because that's the game y'all were playing

It's a fucked up coincidence.

[GOPisEvil]

3. What does your friend think?

Is he offended? If not, then the other people in your ring need to clam up.

[sniffa]

6. he sent a curt repLy

"she's fine thanks"

i finaLLy found out there's much more to the story that's not in the paper, and he's reaLLy upset about it. if i had been privey to that info i obviousLy wouLdn't have sent it out at aLL, and at most just sent him a private "is your mom ok".

the angry repLies came from peopLe who were privey to the missing info. doh!

[GOPisEvil]

7. Ouch...you had better start apologizing...

[sniffa]

12. i was informed

by one of the angry repLiers that he is upset, and not to bring it up anymore..... so i wiLL honor that request (besides, i don't want to feeL anymore uncomfortabLe than i do now).

aLso, he didn't share with me the story (story in the paper doesn't cover what reaLLy happened) so if i apoLogize now (because i know what happened now - it's actuaLLy reaLLy sad) it's because the gossip got back to me (that may be worse). what a big f'n can of worms i opened. :(

the story in the paper was reaLLy funny, so i was in disbeLief at the anger it invoked, but now i know why.

[GOPisEvil]

13. Yikes...maybe when things die down a bit...

If you're all good friends, maybe they'll accept your apology.

[sniffa]

18. it's ok now (i think)

i'm getting the more caLmer emaiLs now, teLLing me not to worry about it. so i'm caLming down now as weLL.

i'm aLso more informed now on what happened, and why some of the guys reacted the way they did - those were "pre-emptive" actions to Let me know not to go down that road.

can i sue the boston heraLd (RW rag) for the story not being "fair & baLanced" and reporting the bad side of the story?

[StopTheMorans]

19. it was on the channel 4 news last night at 6:00PM too

and they presented it as a woman who hit her head (and was temporarily knocked unconscious) on a door to a crawl-space while she was putting some things down there. Got stuck in there for 16 hours, and finally a boater heard her cries for help.

[olddem43]

4. Having a conscience proves that you have no

latent Repug tendencies. You are truly one of us.

[sus]

5. you didn't rag on him, so what's the problem?

your asshole has plenty of class.

..er..or so i've heard..

[sniffa]

8. thanks, but my stomach is fuLL of pain now

damn it! this seems to directLy go against my phiLosophy of no expectations.

[sus]

20. do you have ulcers?

(serious question)

[sniffa]

21. don't know

don't think so. i think they're just stress pains.

[Commie Pinko Dirtbag]

9. Misjudged

Should start by sending the "is this your mom" message only for the friend in question.

[TA]

10. Dear now i feel horrible. should i?

Now that you know your friends mother is OK you should e-mail him and mention what an idiot his mothers mother is for raising such a dufuss daughter. Tell him he should hope that that lack of parenting skill hasn't been passed on to him.

[jukes]

11. sniffa

apsi not



how cd you know? you played by the rules, this is just 1 of life's unfort coink's. if they can't handle an unintended faux pas, they need to find a schoolyard to play in.

[Red State Rebel]

14. Not your fault! Did they expect you to have ESP???

I'd send him a six pack or something similar and say sorry, you had no way of knowing and would never intentionally say something to hurt him.

[DS1]

15. Hey, it's his mom that's an idiot, it's not your fault she made the

f*cking papers :eyes:

[bhunt70]

16. Why are all your "L"'s capitalized?

[supernova]

17. I would have sent a personal note

to the guy (sans article) and not made it a "reply all," since this was someone you know.

OTOH, your other friends were rather doltish for jumping down your throat for an honest inquiry about something you didn't know fully.

Give your friend some time to cool off and and apologize. Send some flowers to his mom saying "glad you're ok"

[Fleshdancer]

22. If it were me, I'd be creative about my apology....

I would create a fake news story about a friend who mistankenly made a hurtful joke by accident because of a terrible coincedence. At the end of the "story" I would then write a personal message to the friend to apologize for any hurt feelings and ask if there was anything I could do to help.