Question for parents re: Bathroom privacy

[dolo amber]

Right, so I of course am referring to parents w/young children...I seriously hope no one with teen-agers is having this issue...:\

Anyway, do you allow your young children in the bathroom with you? I can't convince my 4 yr old that I am perfectly capable of conducting all bathroom-related activities all by my little self...she feels the need to supervise or something. I have a friend who has 3 kids, 7,6, and 4. She allows them to be in with her no matter WHAT she is doing, and that includes bathing. I'm not trying to be all moralist or anything; if you want your kids to see you nekkid it's nought to me...my whole point is this:

The bathroom is like the ONLY refuge I get from her, even in 2-3 minute increments. This is an ongoing battle. I say "Ruby, get OUT of the bathroom!", and she just shakes her head at me as though she knows best, comes right in and closes the door behind her. I mean, there will probably come a day when I do require assistance in the toilet, but today ain't it...:silly:

Hep me jeebus...x(

[lojasmo]

1. Lock that sucker.

As long as there's somebody there to be responsible for her, your privacy/sanity is important!

[nini]

2. 4 years old? that's worse than the terrible twos.

don't let her in.. it's more of a power struggle than anything else right now and you can't let her get the upper hand or you might as well resign yourself to hell filled teen years.

:-)

[DemExpat]

3. The only prob I see here is the battle over this issue.....

and she is winning it so to see.....:-)

My husband and I raised our 2 kids into adulthood with a comfortable openness about nudity - but it helps that we live in a culture where hiding nudity is an alien concept.

You will have to decide how you want it to be in your home and then find a way to get your daughter to comply.
Good luck!

DemEx

[dolo amber]

4. It really isn't the nudity

at all...it really is just the 2 or 3 minutes to kind of decompress, regroup...but nooooooooo, 'tis not to be...

I think you guys are right in that it's more a battle of wills...:think:

[Fenris]

5. Cats do that too

I'd say lock the door. Or somehow explain to her that for the next 3 minutes, mommy must gracefully occupy the bathroom alone. And if you'd like, throw in "or else!"

[GoddessOfGuinness]

6. I hear ya...

Even with the door closed I can't get a moment's peace. The whole family seems to feel that when I'm in the bathroom, it's the best time to discuss dinner plans, ask permission to go places, and quiz me on Life's deepest mysteries.

Once, right after we got a cordless phone, my husband actually opened the door and handed me the receiver...Ew! He never did that again.

[tigereye]

16. yes, LOL you guys!

I go upstairs to the BR and the first thing I hear is MOM! As I yell, I'm in the bathroom. I will talk to you when I come OUT OF THE BATHROOM! I'm howling now. Face it MOM and PRIVACY do not compute. ALthough I taught my son the privacy concept pretty early and he rarely follows me in there now.


Amber, why not make it a game... tell her she has to hide something from you or find a secret palace when you are in there, or something. Just a thought. :)

Thanks for a good chuckle, Goddess.

[NashVegas]

7. You Are Doing Mysterious "Big Grown Woman" Stuff In There

and she wants to see what there is to it, as she becomes conscious of her own body, most likely.

Or, who knows? Maybe she's afraid you'll get sucked down the toilet?

You could always put a child-proof (ha!) lock on the door …

[Book Lover]

8. For now, yes

Mr. Bunny is 18 months young right now, and so we bring him in so he can see what we use the big water-filled bowl for. But once he gets older, I am sure I too will crave the 10 minutes of privacy you can get if you lock the bathroom door...

[ScreamingMeemie]

9. Used to have the problem until James turned 5 and decided that he

didn't want ME in the bathroom with him anymore either. ;) Now if I could only get the dog to quite following me in....


:hi:

[Lars39]

10. You might try buying her a reeaaally cool toy that she wants.

But make sure she knows upfront that it is one she can ONLY play with while you're in the bathroom. This might only work if she is open to bribery about it. It's a hard one. :shrug:

My SIL's then 3yo boy was told so often, "I need some privacy here!" , that HE started saying this to the males in the family when they would take him to a restroom. :)

[Lisa]

11. we have a very small downstairs bathroom ...

It's more of a "quarter" than a "half". Anyway, I was about 4, and had followed Mom in there when she was going to brush her teeth. I guess my folks must have talked about this, because Dad opened the door and squeezed in as well. Neither of them are particularly large people, but it was a tighter than a sardine can in there! My folks just stood there quietly for a couple of minutes, and I got the message. Since then, bathroom ablutions have been "privacy time" (whether it's the bathtub, the can, or toenail-clipping).

We still laugh about this. My parents are in their 70s now, and they clearly remember the incident.

[Whitacre D_WI]

12. Ruby knows that you're really old.

She's afraid you'll fall and break your hip (I can't believe I'm making "broken hip" jokes to my favorite -- read: sexiest -- Bogart's barmaid from a decade ago).

[MsUnderstood]

13. just be grateful. . .

just be grateful she doesn't rush in and attempt to sniff your panties. . .my doges are terrible about that!

[carpetbagger]

14. Be firm, or lock the door.

Your kid will get over it, and probably grow one more step along the way of learning about respect, limits, and all that other stuff she'll need to get one of these days.

While it's not a demand that everybody needs to make, it's something that a lot of parents demand, and it's certainly within the realm of reasonable measures.

[Lex]

15. Four seems like a good time to talk about privacy

and what privacy means for every person in the family.

Every person in the family should be allowed to have private time, and that it is to be respected.

Is 4 too young to talk about privacy, respect, and knocking on the door instead of barging in?

[dolo amber]

17. We sort of have had that discussion

And she looks at me and nods when I say "Do you understand?"...then barges in again the next time. I really do think some of the people who have said she might be concerned (except for Whitacre...:eyes: :P) might be right. She always asks if I need help, or gives me instructions..."Now get some toilet paper...not too much!" :D

Definitely have to work on this. I hate the idea of locking the door on her, but if it comes to it I s'pose it'd work till she figured out how to pick the lock...:D