I Accidentally Discovered My Sister Bought The 'Plan B' Pill Yesterday

[THUNDER HANDS]

Two nights ago she threw a party at my house (my parents are away in Vegas) and she had some sailors over who were on leave for Fleet Week.

They were her friends from college - not just random sailors, for those wondering.

Anywhoo, I'm pretty sure there was some a drinkin', some smokin' and some sexin' going on in the house. When I came back from my girlfriend's house I saw people passed out all over the place.

Now, my sister is a grown woman (age 21) who can do what she pleases and is probably smarter than me (book smart wise) but I'm concerned about her wild habits.

And when I walked into her room yesterday to see if she had my phone I saw on her bed a receipt from Planned Parenthood and a case of two 'Plan B' pills.

I'm wondering if I should say anything to her. Because I am generally concerned. I don't know if she used protection or whether she was just being safe. But she's a smart girl and maybe if I mention what I found it will jar her into being a little more cautious next time.

Although, I can understand the argument to be made for not saying anything - namely - that it's none of my business. But then again, I am her brother and if it was a bag of heroin that I found, I would have no qualms about approaching her.

If she's engaging in unprotected sex, or sex with complete strangers (there were like, 8 guys over the house and I have no idea who she slept with) then that's probably just as dangerous as shooting heroin, in a sense.

What do you think, should I mention it or leave the issue alone?

[GOPisEvil]

1. You might let her know you are generally concerned.

But, I wouldn't mention any specific things you have seen.

Just let her know you care about her future, and hope that she'll be careful.

[demnan]

2. By all means don't mention the pills

If you knew she had the guys over you can inquire about them and make a few brotherly suggestions but the pills are a private matter and she may have been in a relationship before that night (how do you know?)

[THUNDER HANDS]

5. well

I know she doesn't have a "boyfriend" now. And that she bought the pills yesterday. Now since those are the 'morning after' pills I'd assume she was using them for the sex she just had the night before.

[Lisa0825]

3. I'd say unless you are in the habit of having very intimate discusssions

with her already, then don't bring it up. If she got Plan B, chances are, sex was unprotected. That is what Plan B is for. But if she is aware enough to go to Planned Parenthood and get Plan B, she is probably also aware of consequences of her actions.

Now, if you and sis have the kind of relationship in which it's cool to talk about your sex lives, then that's another matter. personally, I would have been MORTIFIED if my brother ever approached me about the subject, and would have just told him to mind his own business.

[dedhed]

4. Age doesn't matter...

... when it comes to expressing concern to a loved-one. I say talk to her! And let us know how it goes... your story has me concerned about her!!

:bounce:

[LynneSin]

6. Have you ever thought that maybe the condom ripped?

I mean those things are not 100%.

First, I'd be pretty offended if my brother was even thinking of posting this kind of stuff out there on the internet. Second, I would not assume that she was not using a condom. She may have used one and it ripped. Give your sister credit for getting EC to ensure she isn't bringing an unwanted child into the world.

[Nicholas D Wolfwood]

7. I definitely agree with this one

Having had this exact same thing happen to me just yesterday.

[LynneSin]

8. Condom ripped or your brother posting your sex life on the internet

:shrug:

Planned Parenthood does NOT market EC for an alternative to birth control or not using a condom. They market it because they know that condoms rip and rape happens (PP is fighting to have all hospitals provide EC for rape victems so they don't have to deal with pregnancy).

[Nicholas D Wolfwood]

10. Condom ripped

And my girlfriend is not on birth control. Fortunately, she was just over her period, so the risk is minimal, but "plan b" was in effect anyway.

[THUNDER HANDS]

12. i do give her credit for taking care of herself after the fact

But I can't assume the best-case scenario in this instance immediately. She's a heavy-drinking, heavy-partying sorority girl who is extremely bright but is still fallable.

I don't know if the condom broke. I don't even know if she used one. All I know is what I saw. I'm glad she was smart enough to get herself taken care of, but I wish she would use better judgement beforehand.

I saw the guys she was partying with. Not my crowd of gents, so I'm kinda in a concerned state of mind. She is my little sister afterall.

[Lefta Dissenter]

9. Having grown up with a brother,

and being the parent of a son and a daughter, now in their early 20's, I know that at least in OUR family, the brother can get away with being a lot more blunt than the parents can. If it were my son finding the pills, I'd hope that he would talk with my daughter. I know that, despite the bickering throughout the years, she respects him and his opinions.

And so what if your sister gets pissed off at you? She'll get over it, and some of your concern might sift its way through her anger.

edited to add, in response to other people's comments about the possibilities of ripped condom or even rape, I'm assuming that he is tactful enough to bring this up in a concerned, non-accusatory way, not jumping on her. It might give her the opportunity to talk about something for which she needs a shoulder to cry on.

[Loonman]

11. I usually find it best

To not get involved in the affairs of others.

[Fleshdancer]

13. Every sexual woman should have a plan B around

I have some just to keep in my house just in case. I think it's a responsible decision and the only time I've ever used it in the past was when the condom broke.

The morning after pill doesn't mean she's having unprotected sex or that she's with strangers or that she even had sex recently. All it means is that she purchased the morning after pill. It's her business and her body, but if not knowing is eating you up inside, just ask her.

[VelmaD]

14. First off...

what were you doing in her room without asking first? Have you ever heard of a little thing called privacy? Sheesh Rat. I'm gonna be blunt. If this situation happened to me and my little brother brought it up I would be ALL OVER HIS ASS for being in my space without my permission. And I wouldn't believe for one minute he just happened to see the reciept on the bed and could tell what it was for. I would know he was a nosy little shit who picked it up and read it. :)

That said, I do think you can bring up your concern about her behavior without mentioning the pills you saw. Lots of passed out people around the house in more public areas gives you a legitimate opening to talk I think.

[THUNDER HANDS]

15. well

I couldn't find the house phone, and she has a habit of leaving it in her room. That's why I went in there.

And the pills and receipt were laying on the bed, uncovered. I picked the package up not knowing what it was...then I read 'Plan B' and was like 'oh shit' and saw the receipt.

And the only thing I had planned on talking to her about was not letting anyone into my room to use my computer (which also happened that night).

In the end I most likely won't bring it up with her, unless the pills make her really sick, at which point I'll have an opening to talk with her about it.

"So sis, why you throwing up all of a sudden..."

:)

[VelmaD]

17. Well, that changes things a little bit...

if she let people into your room without your permission then her expectation of privacy is pretty much GONE as far as I'm concerned. :evilgrin:

Seriously though, I think you two need to have a little talk about boundaries in addition to a having a talk about not letting people get drunk and pass out all over your parents' house. I know my parents would not be cool with that kind of behavior and I'm betting that your parents wouldn't be either.

[loafie]

16. I agree with you

It's one thing to voice his concern about the passed out men around the house but he shouldn't have been in her room in the first place and has no business mentioning the pills. She obviously has the situation under control or she wouldn't have gotten the pills. My older brother and I are really close and I would be embarassed and really pissed off if he ever mentioned something like this to me. MR and his sis are not very close. It's just not a good idea.