Recall rundown... (satire)

[BlackRhino]

As you may or may not be aware, the campaign to "recall" last year's election of California governor Gray Davis has officially succeeded, and a special election has been set for October 7 of this year. Here's how it's going to work:

When they show up at the polls on October 7, voters will be faced with two choices. The first will be whether or not they wish to keep Gray Davis as governor. Secondly, they will be asked who should replace Davis if more than half of those who vote in this special election choose to recall him. Everybody who votes gets to choose a replacement for Davis, even if they vote to keep him as governor. If the recall attempt is successful, then the next governor of California will be the person who receives the most votes on the second part of the ballot. Unless, of course, lieutenant governor Cruz Bustamante chooses to flex his constitutionally-mandated muscle by simply assuming the governorship, himself, thereby nipping this anti-democratic initiative with a rather un-democratic stratagem of his own. But, considering the potential fallout, that's about as likely as John Ashcroft converting to Islam.

So… is that clear enough for you? Does it make perfect sense and all that? No? Well, too fuckin' bad, sweetie pie, cuz that's how it's going down, regardless. But don't get too upset, because this is where the fun REALLY begins…

To be included as an alternative to Gray Davis on the special election ballot, the only thing prospective gubernatorial wannabes have to do is submit their 65 signatures and their thirty-five hundred dollar registration fee to the state legislature by August 9. Yer old pal Jerky hasn't seen a bar set this low since he judged a limbo competition at an anorexic midget contortionists convention back in 1996. And you know what that means, don't you? It means political HI-LARITY!

Let's take a closer look at the front-runners among those who would be governor… shall we?

[ringmastery]

1. They forgot...

Arianna!

The next governor of the state of California! ;)

[BlackRhino]

2. Is she running as a repuke?

?