Rightwingers are a great source of laughs...

[Redstone]

Well, the RW jerkoff at the bar where we have lunch pretty much shut the fuck up when I handed him the printed facts & figures to refute his parroting of the "Socialized medicine is bankrupting Canada's economy" bullshit.

But that's not the funny part...I went outside to have a cig, and his Pathfinder was parked right in from ot the door, so I couldn't help but notice the window decal...it's about 6 by 4 inches, printed with a flag background and some white squares to make it look like one of those DOD military-base parking / clearance permits.

But what it said, in big black letters, was text to the effect that he's a "U.S. Government Authorized Terrorist Hunter." (I looked around Google, but was unable to find one like it to show you all.)

I almost choked from laughing so hard. Here's a 61-year-old bald, bloviating blowhard of a bucket of lard, and he's a Terrorist Hunter!

I couldn't help it. I was still laughing when I went back inside - I actually had to put my face in my hands - Mrs R (who was sitting between me and the bozo) wouldn't stop asking me what was so funny. I did have some mercy, though, I didn't say I knew it was that guy's SUV; I just said "Some asshole has a truck out there with a window sticker that says he's a U.S. Government Authorized Terrorist Hunter. Who the fuck does he think he's going to impress with that? Or maybe it's real, and that's the reason whey we've never seen Osama bin Laden around town."

Stony silence from Mr Terrorist Hunter. And he left, quietly, soon thereafter. Wonder if he'll be back, and if he does, if the sticker will still be on in his window.

Sometimes it's fun to be cruel.

Redstone

Oh, PS for the trolls: Unlike the "burly E-6" howler, or the "767 with 340 people clapping for the Marines" chestnut, THIS one actually happened.

[BrklynLiberal]

1. Excellent!!!

:hi: :hi: Laughter and shame are THE BEST weapons..

[roguevalley]

2. oh, you are so bad. In a good way. Thanks for the story. :)

[Wetzelbill]

3. my brother wanted me to tell you he fought another badger

no lie either, haha. He's just nuts enough to do it. Actually he was hunting and I think one of his dogs got into it with the badger first, he jumped in and broke it up and had another fight on his hands.

That's a great story. There are lots of really good people out there who are Conservatives, I know many and grew up around people who are naturally conservative, like farmers and ranchers. But, you always get some guy who is an effing blowhard in the first place, and he just happens to spew goofy far- right BS. Then he tries pull that macho shit, when in reality he is nothing but a scrub, who wouldn't have the sand to knock the fluff off of a cup of cappucino if he had to do it himself. I know the kind exactly. Glad you put the chickenshit in his place. People like that deserve it.


I'm a terrorist hunter myself. See:

[Redstone]

6. Fuck me, he fought a badger AGAIN?

OK, I hereby give up any claim that I may ever have had that people might call me a crazy son-of-a-bitch, and bow down to your brother's unparalleled crazy son-of-a-bitchedness.

And I mean that with all due respect. Now I feel like a weenie, because I've never fought a badger even once, and here he's done it twice. I salute him. With those stories, I bet he never has to buy his own beer in a bar. He'd certainly drink free if I was in the bar with him.

You're right; I grew up in a very conservative area, but it's old-fashioned Yankee conservatism, where you go fight wars if you have to, and vote to keep taxes down, but also don't try to tell other people what they can and can't do. That's American conservatism at its best.

It's the fatmouths and ignoramuses and dickheads that screw everything up, as you say. Like I said, who the fuck did he think he's going to impress? Other strutting shitheads with the febrile worldview of a twelve-year old kid and small, um, units?

By the way, this is the same schmuck who complained to Mrs R about me not looking him in the eye when I talked to him; you may remember when I posted about that. That's another funny story: When Mrs R explained to him that it was because I'm an Indian, and we don't do that, he had the balls to say to her "Well, he's not on the reservation anymore, so he should do thing our way." Bless her heart, guess what she told him? She said "You know, since you're white and in America, you're actually on HIS turf, so you don't have any right to tell him what to do."

Isn't she a peach? I still don't understand why she tolerates the asshole and talks to him, but it's not up to me to tell her who to talk to--wait, maybe she just enjoys doing the conversational whack-a-mole game...

Redstone

[Wetzelbill]

11. oh lord

"he should do things our way?" :rofl:

I think Sherman Alexie would say that making a statement like that is not so much a hate crime as it is a crime of irony. :) She was good to keep her cool. Something that dumb might make me snap, lol.

Oh my brother is a wild man. I used to ride bulls and I am nowhere near as crazy as that guy is. He's fought in cage fights, been shot and stabbed before etc. He once got into a fire fight with a guy who he caught lurking around our farm in the middle of the night. They exchanged gun shots back and forth, lol. Stuff just seems to find him, lol. He's only 21 too. Still, fighting a badger... there's something not right with the guy. On another note, I barely have the sand to step on a spider. :)

[Redstone]

15. He's only 21? By the time I was 21, I had...well, been a place

or two and done a few things myself, because any older than that, those things are considerably less survivable, but I never fought even one badger. And I can't do it now to catch up on the fun that I missed because I'm too old, dammit.

Tell your bro he's gotta slow down some. There's no shame in it after you've Fought The Badger Twice, and them badgers get quicker and meaner as you crowd closer up to 30. Or beyond. He keeps it up, Mr Badger's gonna chew his dick off one of those times and how much fun will that be?

Maybe you could slide a couple three Prozacs into his coffee?

Redstone

[babylonsister]

4. Precious, Redstone, and so subtle while still getting your

point across.:toast:

His sticker's msg. still seems scary; I hope he scrapes it off.

[Redstone]

8. Thanks. Actually, I think I know why he doesn't like me:

some time back, he was boasting to the cute young barmaid that he used to work for {them}.

I told him, "You know, that's kind of odd; I worked for {someone else} (which is true) in the early 1970s, and dealt with a few people from {them}. And those guys NEVER told ANYONE that they worked for {them}; the rule was that they always said they worked for the State Department. I can't imagine why that rule would have changed, what with the terrorism and all."

And the barmaid laughed. No wonder he hates me.

Redstone

[babylonsister]

14. You called him out and let him know you knew he was full of it;

lying men are horrid and should be called out, especially when
lying about an occupation they know nothing about nor deserve.
How sad and lame. I'm surprised he didn't drive a Hummer.

I read your story about your wife's response (RE: you having
Indian blood); she sounds like a great soul! But I expected no
less!
:toast:

[Redstone]

16. Sad and lame is right. Especially when they're trying to bullshit

a woman who's half their age and completely uninterested.

Yes, Mrs R is a peach. She's MUCH more tolerant of idiotic people than I am, but she's also extremely loyal, and will not stand for anyone insulting me. (Especially when I'm not there, which was when that conversation happened, of course; he'd never have said that to my face.)

Redstone

[Agnomen]

5. Ridicule is a powerful weapon

[Batgirl]

7. Maybe he left without saying anything because he was deep undercover.

No way to tell for sure without looking at the plastic badge in his wallet.

[Redstone]

9. Damn, you're smart! You figured it out!

See #8 upthread.

Yup, so undercover that he had the sticker in his window. Kinda counterproductive, though, to warn the Bad Guys about his being a Terrorist Hunter and all; wouldn't that give them time to run away before he could hunt them?

Redstone

[Batgirl]

10. Well, I do think it probably interferes with his heroic efforts

at protecting the Homeland. Even the most dimwitted terrorist might feel a tiny bit suspicous if he saw the sticker.

[Redstone]

12. No, wait! I know what they're doing; they're using the stickers

to herd the terrorists together so they can hunt them all in a knot, instead of them being spread out.

You know how it must work: Terrorists see Hunter sticker, run away to the east, only to see ANOTHER Hunter sticker, can't retreat, so they run away to the north, but there's ANOTHER Hunter there, and then with the Hunter to the south they've got the terrorists boxed in for easy hunting.

And here we're calling them stupid. Shame on us. We should have known they have a system.

Redstone

[Wetzelbill]

13. yes! that's right!

In fact, I happen to have an FBI card in my wallet myself. Female Body Inspector. :)

[Danny Udoji]

17. I have to ask

Do you walk around with printed facts & figures all the time or was it luck that you had them with you? Hilarious story.

[Name removed]

18. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[Danny Udoji]

19. WHOA! calme down.

I'm not a troll. You threw that part of the story out there and I asked the question. That does sound strange. Not sure why you think I am a troll. I'll refrain from namecalling because you're mistaken.

[Redstone]

20. Deleted in deference to the mods.

If they think I made a mistake, I'll defer to their judgement and say I made a mistake.

And apologize if necessary.

Redstone

[WearyOne]

21. great story about another Chickenhawk !