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I have done some creative writing, and took the liberty of condensing what you've said. But a marketing expert (and I'm sure DU has many out there) could probably do a better job. This idea is TOO GOOD not to work on ...
Congratulations, Mr. Blackwell!
Let us be the first to congratulate you on your commanding victory in the upcoming gubernatorial election! While our congtraulations may seem premature, there can be no doubt that you will be the officially elected governor of Ohio, regardless of what the voters say about it, now or in the future.
The outcome of the recent referendum makes it clear that no matter how unfavorable the polls, there is no election in Ohio which will not inevitably end in another great victory for the Republican Party, thanks to the diligent efforts of Diebold Election Systems, who continue to be a committed donor to Republican causes.
We realize that you may wish some explanation for our confidence, but suffice it to say that the evidence justifying our conclusions is too abundant to 'recount' (pun intended!) in this brief message.
No, we don't have a crystal ball -- we have the magic of the internet! Simply go to google.com and search for the terms "Ohio Election Fraud", or, for a more detailed look, you can narrow the search to "Ohio Referendum Fraud". (Unfortunately "Ohio Election Fraud 2005" tends to turn up too many hits for the 2004 Election, for some odd reason. But excluding "2000" from your search does help a little.)
We are confident that this internet search will serve to underscore our belief that you, sir, without doubt, are on your way to an astonishingly well-assured victory!
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