What really happened at the Disney School in Tulsa, OK

[TlalocW]

For those who don't know, there's a big shitstorm being caused by the mother of one of the kindergarten students because his teacher supposedly made him spend the day in his underwear as punishment for wearing a Halloween costume to school last Monday.

I have a friend who's an employee at the school. Here's what I got from said friend.

Of 800 kids, only two showed up in Halloween costumes so that implies that parents got some sort of notification from the school or PTA that Halloween costumes weren't allowed. The other one was a girl who had butterfly wings on, and she had to remove them too.

The kid in question was dressed up as a Karate guy, and he was causing a disturbance by Karate chopping other kids. In other words, the kid was acting up and keeping the teacher from doing her job of teaching dozens of other kids.

He couldn't go to the bathroom in it because he had difficulty removing it by himself. The teacher then asked if he had clothes on underneath it, or if he wanted to call his mom for a change of clothes. The kid said he had clothes on underneath.

The clothes did turn out to be underwear... Long gray underwear that looked like sweat pants. Also, the previous Thursday there had been a pajama day so the kid may have thought what he was wearing was perfectly okay since he had just gotten done wearing pajamas to class the previous week.

The kid returned to class, and there were no further incidents except for one kid calling him a freak. Whether it was because of the costume, the other kid recognizing his garb as underwear, or because the kid himself is well known for calling others freaks, we don't know.

The mother causes a shitstorm and goes off the deep end and keeps her son home for a day or two. When he comes back, he's put into a different kindergarten class. However, during lunch or snack time (what ever kindergardners have), he waved and called out to his former teacher and even gave her a hug.

Said kid even went up to my friend who was part of the lunchroom duty people and asked my friend to open up his milk. He was in good spirits, and my friend remarked that he had been missed, and he said something like, "Yeah, my mom kept me home because someone called me a freak." My friend said something to the effect, "Well, sometimes people aren't as nice as we would like them to be, and we just have to go on with life." The kid enthusiastically replied, "You're right!"

The principal talked with a news crew about the incident and apologized but gave the important details of the incident. Mother is now threatening to sue; there have been death threats sent to the principal over email, and they had to hire an armed guard to come to the school.

All in all, this is a nothing incident that was blown up by a stupid parent overreacting about her pwecious widdle baby, who's doing just fine, but the mom apparently can't see that, and thanks to her, the situation is spinning out of control.

TlalocW

[jsamuel]

1. Thanks for the info!!!

Good to know...

[Radio_Lady]

2. You took a lot of time to write that -- it's evidence that people can spin

something out of control -- even when it's not such a big deal.

Thanks so much for writing that message. It is important!

[ClassWarrior]

3. Disney School?

Now that's creepy.

NGU.

[feelthebreeze]

4. Ditto...I retract my previous post from another thread.

Thanks for taking your time to clear this up.

[Walt Starr]

5. I see only one thing wrong in the whole affair now

Why the hell would anybody name a school the "Disney School"?

[PinkTiger]

7. Named after W.E. Disney, a Democrat Congressman of note.....

Not related to the Walt Disney empire.

Wesley E. Disney Collection

"Wesley Ernest Disney, seven-term congressman from Oklahoma's First District, played a long and important role in Oklahoma politics. Reared and educated in Kansas, where he was born on October 31, 1883, Disney was admitted to the bar, and moved to Muskogee, Oklahoma, in 1908. While in Muskogee, Disney began his political career by becoming county attorney, and then went on to become a member of the Oklahoma House of Representatives.

While in the State House (1919-1924) Disney, a Democrat, voted in favor of the 18th and 19th amendments and numerous progressive labor laws. He also assumed a leadership role in the impeachment proceedings against then Governor John C. "Jack" Walton. On the merit of his accomplishments he ran a successful campaign for the U.S. House in 1930. He remained in the House until 1944, at which time he commenced a long anticipated run for the Senate against incumbent Elmer Thomas. Disney, by this time an anti-New Deal Democrat, took on the Roosevelt-supporting Thomas, claiming that Thomas was backed by the "CIO goon squads." Disney lost in the primary and lived out his professional life as a lawyer in Washington, D.C. He died in 1961.

Link:

http://www.ou.edu/special/albertctr/archives/disney.htm

[Walt Starr]

14. Okay, that explains it.

As long as there aren't Lifesize renderings of Goofy on the walls and Dumbo merry go rounds in the playground, I can live with teh fact that not every Disney is related to the Disney cartoon empire.

[Chiyo-chichi]

16. Nope. It is named after Walt.

http://www.tulsaschools.org/Schools/disney/

Walt Disney Elementary School. Click on the link, then "Who was Walt Disney?" Yep. THAT Walt Disney.

WHY they named a school for him in TULSA, I don't know.

If you can't wear costumes at Walt Disney Elementary, though, where can you wear costumes? Constumes should be mandatory every day at WDE.

Thanks for sharing the Oklahoma history, though.

[Dorian Gray]

18. "If you can't wear costumes at Walt Disney Elementary, though, where can..

you wear costumes?"

Exactly, Sooner! The Irony is killing me! :)

[PinkTiger]

31. Probably renamed it after Walt because W.E. was a Democrat, LOL

Sorry - thought I was being such a good reporter.
I knew that Disney, Okla. was named for the Congressman, and just assumed that the school would be, too.
Well, you know how to spell A S S U M E !!!!


Ha

[TlalocW]

8. Don't listen to the previous replier

The school is basically a sweat shop that trains kids to be future Disney artists, animators, etc. The ones who can't pass have to dress up in the costumes at the theme parks, etc. :)

It's Tulsa's dark, shameful secret.

TlalocW

[RoyGBiv]

6. Question: tangent ...

I probably shouldn't focus on this, but I can't help it. It's the only part of this that struck me as odd.

Why would a school have a "pajama day"? I just find that a bit weird, if for no other reason than a lot of people don't wear "pajamas" of any sort, and some things that are called pajamas, even with little kids, are not the kind of thing I'd want my child wearing in public. I'm guessing this means the kids could wear extremely casual, comfortable clothing like sweat pants and the like, but I find it hard to believe they were allowing kids literally to wear what we commonly think of as underwear.

But anyway ... this is good information nonetheless. There was a kid in my class in grade school whose mother threatened to sue the school because some other kid shot him with a pellet gun, which was BS, and everyone, including the supposed victim, knew it was BS. For some stupid reason we'd developed this game we called Red Hots War, or some variation of that. You bought Red Hots from the concession and tried to stick them to other people, which left a red mark. This kid went home with a lot of red marks one day, and his mom decided he was being shot at. It was weird. The solution was to "outlaw" Red Hots at school. Just bizarre what overbearing parents do sometimes.

[Blue Diadem]

11. They have pj days around here too.

Yep, the kids go to school in pj's, nightgowns, sweats, whatever they may sleep in..and some go complete with big fuzzy slippers. Personally, we always nixed the slippers..too dangerous with stairs, hallway traffic and playground activities.

My kids have long been out of school but my granddaughter is a first grader. I know this year, spirit/pride week took place the week of Halloween. One day they dress as the opposite sex, one day is school colors, one day is PJ day and they celebrated Halloween on Friday. I know I'm missing a day..can't remember what it was though.

[LWolf]

12. Pajama Day

and Crazy Hat/Hair day, backwards day, mismatched day, etc. are usually organized to show "school spirit," and to inject something fun and different into the routine.

When I worked at a school that did "pajama" day, it worked like this:

rule #--you must adhere to the dress code, pajamas or not. Therefore, no slippers, etc.; regular shoes. No excess skin showing.

What we usually saw in the way of pajamas included things like blanket/footie pajamas, with feet stuffed into shoes; sweats; Big night shirts over leggings; nightgowns over jeans.

The other "pajama" day that I've seen done is where kids come dressed as above, with sleeping bags, pillows, etc., and spend the day curled up reading. Usually lots of adults on hand to read to, with, or alongside of them, kind of like a reading slumber party. I've also seen this done as an evening program.

[bmbmd]

30. My wife teaches school.

She keeps an assortment of spare clothing in her room....

[sproutster]

9. I still don't think it's right.

I may be in the minority, but come ON. The teacher asks the kid his opinion, and let's him run around in long underware? Scuse me, but if I'm thinking of the right ones, the little fly is made for access. It was a bad decision. The mother should have been called upfront.

They are opining that being called a freak is his fault, and his mothers fault.

All it would have taken is a freaking phone call. A kid wore a halloween costume and they made sure to make an example of him.

[bmbmd]

10. Sounds a little extreme to me, too.

Okay-sounds a lot extreme. I don't like it at all. He is a baby, for crying out loud.

[400Years]

17. He wore a karate suit, big fucking deal

How does wearing a karate suit keep anybody else from learning?
If he was hitting other kids he should have been punished for that but
his outfit shouldn't have been the issue. I don't get into the fetishizing of clothes the way teachers and administration types do.
School is really more about making little worker drones than education.

[TlalocW]

19. The rule was

No Halloween costumes, and 798 kids got it right. From what my friend said, it sounded like the teacher was going to let it slide, but because of his difficulty going to the bathroom and his acting up in it, he became a problem that kept her from doing her job. If you put a five-year-old boy in a costume like that, he is going to act like the character so it doesn't matter if you, as an adult, don't get into the "fetishizing" of clothes.

TlalocW

[400Years]

20. If the issue was his behavior then it wasn't his clothes

now was it, and as far as the above report you have only one side of it so I'll take it with a grain of salt.

[TlalocW]

21. The issue was both

There was to be no Halloween costumes, and the costume the kid was wearing contributed to his inappropriate behavior. As far as my report being one side of it, no duh. Other posts covered it from different aspects, but I have a friend who works there and could give me more of an inside scoop.

TlalocW

[400Years]

24. a piece of cloth made him do bad things?

gimme a break

[TlalocW]

28. How much experience do you have with 5-year-olds?

I don't have a lot, but I can tell you when I put a blue towel around my neck at that age, I was Batman.

TlalocW

[insane_cratic_gal]

13. Ok I understand there was some major

over reaction, but there is still one thing that bothers me.

Why didn't they call his mother to bring in a change of clothes? I see that the teacher asked him about it? Even just to tell her (again) "the policy is no costumes, so we'd like your child remove his. Could you bring in a set of clothes or is what he has on ok to wear what is underneath?" I think the issue could of been controlled from that launching point.

To be honest, if it were my child it happened to, I'd probably over react as well. We often don't have focus when it comes to our kids. When their feelings get hurt we tend to go into over drive.

Now is it any reason to keep him home for 2 days? No, I wouldn't of done that, I might of expressed my dislike of the action with the teacher. I would not have yanked my child out of the class either.

When the only story I have to go by is that of a 5 or 6 year old, I'm bound to get only his version of the truth. Another reason the Mother should of been called, she'd have the accurate version of the truth.

I guess it's true what they say about hindsight.

[RayOfHope]

25. They may have tried

One of my jobs (I worked with a Title 1 Reading program in my district) was to be a liaison between parents and the school. You wouldn't believe how unbelievably hard it can be to get in touch with some parents. Many didn't have landlines or cellphones, they worked in a job on a factory floor that made it difficult to take phone calls, or the number the parents gave school was that of a neighbor with a phone. Other than a note home, there literally was no way to contact parents if they didn't have access to a phone of some sort.

This school may or may not have tried (and they should have), but it's not always easy to get in touch with parents.

[insane_cratic_gal]

26. Perhaps that is true

If I were the school and I had made that attempt I would focused on that detail. There are always secondary people to call though yes? Grandparents, neighbors, Aunts, Uncles, just to name a few. I know my child's contact list is extended.

Or perhaps we really need a serious dialog about children and schools in this country. How we as a society react, under or over about our kids. I'm sure this kid will laugh about it with his own children one day, if we allow him too and stop making a poster child for what is wrong with us.

[RayOfHope]

27. I agree

with everything you wrote. I want to reiterate what I said above though--although your contact list may be a mile long (mine is too) the reality is that it isn't always so. I was astounded at the number of parents that couldn't be reached.

[Loonman]

15. "Mother is now threatening to sue"

Is the way of things now. Who benefits? The fucking lawyers.

[Jose Diablo]

22. Sniff, sniff..is that the aroma of money in the air? n/t

[earth mom]

23. The teacher and school are TOTALLY WRONG.

They treated this kid as a leper and then are surprised that the parent might sue?! :eyes:

It is obvious they are painting the kid as "wild" and the parent as "crazy" as a tactic to use against them in court. The teacher and school are WRONG and they know it but won't admit it. I've seen this "us" (school) vs "them" (parents) attitude by school administrations myself and it's despicable! :puke:

Think about it. It was an honest mistake and could happen to anyone! Who in their right mind would want their kid treated like that?! :grr:

[TlalocW]

29. No, the parent is wrong

The way it is in this country right now, we have "parents" and the cult of the child going on where they're spoiled rotten, taken to inappropriate places like R rated movies at 9 pm on school nights, and where the parent tries to be the kid's friend instead of a parent, etc.

He wasn't treated like a leper. They had to deal with his wearing a costume (not just because it was against the rules, but he couldn't easily go to the bathroom in it) and his acting up. They might have been a little naive when they asked him if he had clothes underneath, and he said yes, but they gave him the option of calling his mom for a change of clothes. He said no, and the underwear he had on looked like sweat/athletic pants. They did not make the kid disrobe, notice he was wearing nothing but underwear and decide that would be a fitting punishment. It's hard to imagine a teacher being dense enough to think that a punishment like that wouldn't land him or her in hot water. They thought he was wearing sweat pants.

I've seen the us vs them attitude as well, and normally it's despicable because of the parents. The kid is not traumatized, but we've got this whole, "Oh, my gawd, the more widdle chiiiiiiiildren" thing going on in this country over the slightest thing, and frankly, it's this kind of bullshit that perpetuates it.

TlalocW

[400Years]

33. no, you are wrong TlalocW

[earth mom]

35. Have to disagree with ya there...

Do you have kids? Have you ever been in a dispute with a school? More often than not school administrations do what's best for THEM not what's best for the kid(s). It's doubtful that they gave the kid "the option" of calling his parents. That makes no sense. Sounds like they told him what to do and then tried to cover it up by saying he could have called his parents but choose not to. Give me a break! :eyes:

And by the way.... not every parent overindulges their child NOR is every kid is a spoiled rotten brat. :eyes:

[FreedomAngel82]

32. Thanks for the clarification

:) I'm glad the little guy is doing okay. :)

[CornField]

34. I still have questions

First, did the mother know about the ban on costumes and send her child in one anyway just to make some sort of statement?

Second, why didn't the school pull the kid into the office and phone the mother?

It seems to me that both parties may have blame to share:

1. No child should be forced to endure a school day in their long johns.

2. Parents should not use their children as a political playing chip. (If that indeed did happen.)