Has anyone met someone who said the Earth was 6000 years old?

[ck4829]

If so, I have a funny story for you.

[ProdigalJunkMail]

1. well, yeah, I have...

story, please :-)

subjectProdigal

[NicRic]

86. Yoda ? N/T

[NMDemDist2]

2. amazingly, yes I have

we had a customer and her son come over to telescope one night

her 14 year old son informed me that the light from the stars could't be millions of years old, since the universe had only existed for 5000 years.

I was dumbfounded.

[amber dog democrat]

10. I had a co worker get upset over discussing the big bang

- had to do with background radiation dating back billions of years ago. According to her this was not possible since the universe is only thousands of years old.

[Solomon]

3. Yes. Some members of my fundy family say the bible is literally true

and that the world is only about 6,000 years old if you count the generations of the bible.

So now, what's the funny story?

[Bunny]

22. My brother is a fundy and he believes that too.

Also says that Carbon 14 dating is flawed. :shrug:

[displacedtexan]

4. Yes. Quite a few of them.

The funniest were the ones in my biology classes in college. They didn't last long-- and this was at Texas Christian University, too.

They wanted to be graded on a religion-based grading scale, and they wanted separate test questions.

They all disappeared mysteriously after the first week of classes.

[Barad Simith]

5. MET?

Try growing up believing it like gravity because it was taught at the church you attended three times a week and the private school that was financed by the church, in addition to every relative on both sides of the family believing it also.

Your story is funnier than that?

[Ladyhawk]

73. You too, huh? :D n/t

[ck4829]

6. *My funny story*

Even if Creationism is true.

The Earth would be about 11,000 years old.

I once counted up the lifespans of Adam and the other people in the book of Genesis in my free time.

And those people call themselves Fundamentalists.

[China_cat]

8. Try to remember that these are the

same people who also insist that since the bible is literally true in all respects that grasshoppers only have 4 legs. Doesn't matter what any child of 5 can count, they only have -4- legs.

And bats are birds and rabbits chew a cud without a rumen.

[kestrel91316]

79. Funny rabbit factoid from the vet:

Rabbits and rats and horses have very similar GI tracts and digestive processes, as they all do most of their digesting in a very enlarged cecum. The cecum is a blind-ended pouch that is located where the small intestine empties into the large intestine. In people it's vestigial and is known as the appendix and only serves to cause trouble. I have never understood how the stuff that finds its way into the cecum also manages to find its way back out at the right time...........one of those eternal gastrointestinal mysteries.

Now, back to our sponsor.

[dmkinsey]

30. That's It?

I feel cheated

[ck4829]

33. What?

Don't you think that's funny?

"Oh, look at me, I'm a Fundamentalist who takes the Bible literally and I and all of my Fundamentalist friends believe that the Earth is 6000 years old, yet we don't read the Book of Genesis and see a 5000 year difference!"

Don't you see the Irony?

:D

[triguy46]

31. 11000 is the number. n/t

[Az]

58. Actually there is a debate amongst creationists

They are split between whether the earth is 6000 or around 10000 years old. Seems some others took your insite into account as well.

And for the record I have met plenty of both ilk.

[Toots]

64. What life span did you give to them?

Remember they lived in the hundreds of years back in them days...Methusalah was suposed to be nine hundred years old and Noah was over six hundred years old..

[ck4829]

67. Exactly

I counted up how long they all lived and came up with, I think, approximately 11,456 years.

It just stuns me, this little factoid about the Bible can be easily calculated and found.

Yet, there is a creationist zoo that says the Earth is no more than 6000 years old.

How can Fundamentalists take a literal approach to the Bible when they do something stupid like this?

[Walt Starr]

76. I think you're off. If you add up all the ages of all the patriarchs

From the creation of Adam to flood is only 1656 years.

BTW, little known bible fact.

Methuselah died the year of the flood.

[ck4829]

82. It goes beyond that

I counted people who lived after the flood too.

[Walt Starr]

77. That's where you messed up

I counted up how long they all lived and came up with, I think, approximately 11,456 years.

You need to count up how old they were when they fathered the next patriarch in line.

[phusion]

70. Sounds about right...

the agricultural revolution is estimated to have begun around 8000BC.

[Ilsa]

7. Oh yeah. My husband works with some in the

financial software industry. They believe it most of the time, even though the science and medicine they want and need says something different.

[Barad Simith]

9. Some of the more "scientific" of the creationist theologians...

...put the age closer to 8,000 years. It's considered to be a kind of sophisticated or elevated point of view (much like the footnote for Revelation 13:18 which states the number of the beast might be 616 instead of 666).

[kestrel91316]

80. More sophisticated thought: carbon dating is a satanic plot.

[ChairmanAgnostic]

11. last weekend. some fundies came to preach & screech at me

I told them politely to
GET THE FUCK OFF MY PROPERTY BEFORE I CALL THE POLICE.

They tried to argue that without the word of their god, I would perish in hell and that something saving 144,000 was about to happen. They did claim the world was the center of the universe and that he created the grand canyon as a test of faith.

[ProdigalJunkMail]

12. telling someone to 'get the f*ck off my property...'

is hardly polite...regardless of tone in delivery and really not a whole lot better than their showing up on your doorstep in the first place.

subjectProdigal

[Occulus]

61. Are they polite to gays and lesbians?

No? Well, then.

If they try it here, they risk a LOT worse than a few words.

[ProdigalJunkMail]

63. the poster said 'politely'

that was the point...

subjectProdigal

[ChairmanAgnostic]

65. that is true. but they ignored the first five polite requests.

They were on a mission.

[ET Awful]

16. If they mentioned 144,000, they weren't typical fundies, they were typical

Jehovah's Witnesses.

They have a real hang-up with that 144,000 number. Something to do with 12,000 each from the 12 tribes of Israel.

[greekspeak]

19. Try Revelation 7:4-8

This pericope states that 12,000 from each of the 12 tribes of Israel will "make it" to heaven. 144,000. Of course, Revelation was the least accepted canonical book in Antiquity and is the most misunderstood today. All the graphic languages reflect the hopes and fears the readers had at the time the book was written. There is no Ronald Reagan, or Evil Empire of Russia, or any of that fun stuff. It has to do with Roman persecutions, probably under the last of the Flavian emperors--right before Nerva came in and shit calmed down.

[Cleita]

55. I knew some fundies who believed Revealation was the

devil's work. They believed prophesy or fortune telling came from the devil and anyone who believed in it would go straight to hell. I know now that they weren't mainstream fundies, even though they believed in all the other fundie clap trap. They must have belonged to a breakaway sect. They actually traveled to another county for services three times a week even though there were fundie churches closer by. It makes sense now that I know that Revealation is a mainstream belief by most of the fundies.

[mitchum]

34. Jehovah's Witnesses are the only door-to-door biblethumpers...

to whom I am polite.
Why? They don't vote. They're still nuts, but at least they are not trying to turn their crassyass beliefs into legislation.

[salin]

42. Even better you can engage them in bush bashing.

Seriously. There... end of times... I know it is bad, did you know that George Bush's administration did x and y... did you know that Bushco did q and p... I agree that things are in a very troubling state of affairs.

heh.

Did that a month or so ago - and they were nodding in agreement and told me how knowledgeable I was and that most folks they met with were not (sad - but this is Indiana, afterall), they left their literature (heck if they let me go on and on per politics instead of their going on and on in preaching to me, the least I could do was to "accept" their literature - even if I wasn't going to read it.

[fujiyama]

75. Smart thinking

It's always better to educate someone (or even attempt to do so) than just verbally attack them.

Now on the other hand, if they become arrogant, hostile, and downright nasty, then I suppose it's fine to be an ass.

[kestrel91316]

81. The JWs send their cute girlies in the long dresses around my

neighborhood every couple of years. They are always unfailingly sweet, and polite, and probably deluded, too. I just tell them I am not interested and they wish me a nice day and go away.

It bothers me that they come into this neighborhood, though, because we have a VERY high percentage of Conservative and Orthodox Jews here, and I can't imagine that they appreciate being pestered. The thingie (mezuzzah??)at the door frame should tip folks off that it's an observant Jewish home, but apparently they ignore it.

[bleedingheart]

13. only in jest...

picture this...my father in law, in Grand Rapids Michigan, is at this exhibit of the Great Lakes...which discusses how they were formed during the last ice age 10,000 years ago but that the basin area was millions of years old...and he starts saying..."This is all heresy...everyone knows the world is only 6,000 years old"...

it is a very religous area and he was trying to yank someone's chain....

[salin]

43. I have never heard it, even in jest.

have mostly lived in college communities or fairly cosmopolitan areas - thus if folks believe the 6,000 year old thing, they are smart enough not to discuss it with folks outside of their church - as they would appear to be a bit ignorant to others in the community.

[DJ MEW]

14. I heard about this once

I was watching the movie Inherit The Wind when I first heard about this. The movie is a court room drama about the Scopes Monkey Trial of 1925. The man that was arguing in favor of outlawing evolution in the classroom, played by George C Scott, mentioned that some Bishop was the person that "Determined for us" that the world was created over 4000 thousand years ago. In the movie they get right down to the time of the day that the Bishop decided it happened.

But that was the only time that I ever heard about it.

[MojoXN]

38. Archbishop Ussher...

"Scientifically determined that the world was created at 9 A.M. on October something-or-other(I think it was the 25th), 4004 B.C.

Crazy ideologically blinded asshole...

MojoXN

[DJ MEW]

50. was that eastern standard time or rocky mountian time

"It couldn't of been day light savings time cause gawd did not make the sun for a few more days"

:rofl:

[Aristus]

54. October 4th, 4004 b.c. at 8:30am.

I think that's what they claim is the start time.


:crazy:

[mshasta]

56. it was raining..or just partly cloudy...

with a little volcano activity? :silly:

[Sapphire Blue]

78. *** Audio mp3 *** clip from the 1960 version of "Inherit the Wind"...

... w/Spencer Tracy as Henry Drummond & Frederick March as Matthew Brady... a great movie!

Audio mp3: http://www.americanrhetoric.com/mp3clips/newmoviespeeches/moviespeechinheritthewind.mp3

Excerpt...

Brady: A fine biblical scholar, Bishop Usher, has determined for us the exact date and hour of the Creation. It occurred in the year 4004 B.C.

Drummond: Well, that's Bishop Usher's opinion.

Brady: It's not an opinion. It's a literal fact -- which the good Bishop arrived at through careful computation of the ages of the prophets, as set down in the Old Testament. In fact, he determined that the Lord began the Creation on the 23rd of October, 4004 B.C. at, uh, 9:00am.

Drummond: that Eastern Standard Time? Or Rocky Mountain Time? It wasn't Daylight Saving Time, was it, because the Lord didn't make the sun until the fourth day.

Brady: That is correct.

http://www.americanrhetoric.com/MovieSpeeches/moviespeechinheritthewind.html

[mwb970]

15. I knew a guy at work who believed this.

He said that the fossils, rock strata, etc. were "tricks" put there by God to test our faith. He constantly railed at "junk science", defined as anything that didn't square with the Bible.

My favorite, though, was his denial of global warming. (Why do these people all adopt the exact same idiocies?) Asked about data clearly showing rising temperatures everywhere on earth over the last few decades, he said that the meteorologists had moved their thermometers from the shade into the sun without realizing the effect that would have on their measurements. I actually had to laugh out loud at that one.

[mitchum]

35. I also had a coworker who insisted that god "tricked" scientists

I just told him that was one petty and silly god he believed in.

[vptpt]

41. Thanks, that made me laugh too!

"...he said that the meteorologists had moved their thermometers from the shade into the sun without realizing the effect that would have on their measurements."

It's one thing for someone to be stupid. It's worse when that same person thinks everyone else is even more stupid.

Thanks for the laugh, you brightened my Monday morning!

[LWolf]

17. Too many for comfort.

I haven't "done the math." But that is funny! :D

[LaurenG]

18. Oh yes and in a University Organic Chemistry class

This was a grown woman who had served in the military. We were discussing carbon dating. She stood up and yelled at the professor that the earth was 4000 years old and no older. The Bible stated it clearly and he had better quit teaching "propaganda". It was quite embarrassing but she wouldn't back down. He just kept talking about the subject and ignored her request.

[Hokie]

20. I have some relatives who do

They believe:

The earth is around 6000 years old
The Great Flood carved out the Grand Canyon
The Almighty Lord placed dinosaur bones around just to test our faith
The geological strata were laid down during the Great Flood

I kid you not. There are lots of folks in my neck of the woods who hold similar beliefs.

[MojoXN]

39. From the Browns helmet, I take it that you're in Ohio...

How odd. My encounter with this species of fundie happened in Ohio too. Must be something in the water...

MojoXN

[Hokie]

69. I used to be in OH

I live in NE Kentucky now but SE Ohio is just as bad.

[ikri]

21. Want to mess with their heads?

Ask them how long a day is.

Before chapter 1, verse 5 of genesis there is no day or night, therefore a day prior to the point at which a day can be measured is of infinite length. Between the Earth being created and day & night being invented there is an infinite amount of time. That'll give them a headache.

[mwb970]

37. What about the two separate creation stories in Genesis?

They do contradict each other, you know. How do the fundies believe in both?

[PsychoDad]

23. I was raised in a Southern Baptist family....

And attended Christian schools as well as the normal sunday school.

So yes, that was what they taught. Roughly 6000 years old, give or take.

I remember asking in 6th grade (Being something of a science buff), that if this were true, how come we could see light from the andromida galaxy which is over 2 million light years away, determined using the "Standard Candles" method, when logic would dictate that we should only be able to see objects no more than 6000 ly away.

The answer was that either the method was wrong (outside our galaxy) or more likely God had played with the speed of light 6000 years ago just to test us.

[Mutley]

83. Thats why you can't debate them.

Their answer to every question is "God did it to test us." It drives me nuts. I just let people believe what they want to believe and I go on believing what I believe.

[PsychoDad]

85. Exactally.

And it is a healthy attitude you have.

If we do change in our views of spirituality or religion, it always comes at it's own time in our "evolution" as human beings. :)

Peace.

[Lerkfish]

24. never have, sorry.

[acmavm]

25. Yes, a former boss of mine. The same guy that told me that he's never

seen any evidence that proves the existence of dinosaurs.

[RedG1]

26. Bible people living for hundreds of years...

Noah's son Sham lived 600 years and Methuselah really did live nine hundred years....I can believe that when I see Barbara Bush, Lynn Cheney, Ann The Man Coulter and Janet Parsals on TV talk shows <snicker>

[dmkinsey]

27. Yeah

My uncle. Total nut-job

[johnnie]

28. Yup

I know a few people who believe that. I work with two of them who believe that carbon dating is junk science. To a lot of them science is wrong unless it supports their anti-choice position. They pick and choose their science *and* biblical teachings to best fit their life styles.

[WePurrsevere]

29. 45 & I haven't yet... guess most folks I've met are a bit more rational...

or have just enough sense to keep their mouths shut (this area would probably look at someone like that as though they'd sproated an extra head). ;)

Someday I'd love to see a really good study done which includes the demographics on certain beliefs.

[mmonk]

32. No

and I live in the heart of the bible belt. Amazing that I don't know any of them. Good thing too because I'd really piss them off.

[MojoXN]

36. I have...

I even got the whole spiel about Satan putting fossilized dinosaur bones into the Earth in order to try and decieve "God's people." After all, Genesis didn't mention dinosaurs, so they simply MUST be an unholy deception.

When I pointed out that according to Genesis, GOD created the Earth, not Satan, I was told, "Gawd let Saytun put them there bones up in th' rawcks to test th' fayth of'n his TRUE belivers!" When I calmly mentioned that Genesis said NOTHING of God permitting Satan's subterfuge, I got, "That's 'cause Gawd din't wunt us t' have alla th' answers, 'else Satan wooden be able to use his lies t' bring th' Gawdless t' his breast." (No shit. Although I'm deliberately making fun of the accent and lack of education of this fundie, the part about "Satan bringing the Godless to his breast" is 100%, unadulterated truth.)

I didn't even get a chance to bring up radioactive decay. I probably would have exploded some heads, or alternatively, received the ever-popular, "A-Radio-a-what-now?"

Epicycles man. Fucking Epicycles, that's all I've got to say.

MojoXN

EDIT: More humorous spelling of "wouldn't"

[momster]

40. Yep

I've also met one or two who insisted, since the Bible is the revealed Word, that it was written in English...17th Century English at that. Therefore Moses and Jesus spoke English.

The "6000 year old Earth" thing is based on the works of one James Usher or Ussher, a Irish bishop who lived around the reign of James I -- Charles II. He calculated the date of the Creation by working out a system of dates (based in part on how long it would take a guy to Begat somebody) and placed the date of Creation in October of 4004 B.C. Since J. Christ lived 2000 years ago, and basic math is not beyond the grasp of most people, we wind up with an Earth-age of 6000 years, give or take a couple of Begattings. All I can say is I wish they would have had TV in the 17th century. James Ussher might have found something better to do with those long winter evenings -- like watching Ye Desperate Alewives.

[salin]

44. No - but I read a hilarious poster on Freep - who kept asserting that

dinosaurs were on Noah's Ark. Had it all worked out - and that allowed that dinosaur's did exist without compromising the fundy time-line.

[ET Awful]

45. I'll tell ya', that boat must have tilted something awful to one side

when that bronto shifted his as around trying to get comfortable eh?

[momster]

46. Dinos on the Ark

Well if they had meat-eating dinos, that might explain what happened to the unicorns and the hippogriffs....

[ET Awful]

47. Nah, the unicorns never made it onto the ark, they were too busy

playing and goofing off . . . or so sayeth Shel Silverstein :)

A long time ago when the earth was green
And there was more kinds of animals than you've ever seen,
And they run around free while the earth was bein' born
And the loveliest of all was the Unicorn.

There was green alligators and long-necked geese.
There was humpy bumpy camels and chimpanzees.
There was catsandratsandelephants, but sure as you're born
The loveliest of all was the Unicorn.

But the Lord seen some sinnin', and it caused him pain.
He says, "Stand back, I'm gonna make it rain."
He says, "Hey brother Noah, I'll tell you watcha do
Go and build me a floatin' zoo.

And you take two alligators, and a couple of geese,
Two humpy bumpy camels and two chimpanzees.
Take twocatsandratsandelephants, but sure as you're born,
Noah, don't you forget my Unicorn."

Now Noah was there and he answered the callin',
And he finished up the ark just as the rain started fallin'.
He marched in the animals two by two,
And he called out as they went through,

"Hey Lord, I got your two alligators and your couple of geese,
Your humpy bumpy camels and your two chimpanzees.
Got your catsandratsandelephants, but Lord I'm so forlorn
Cause I just don't see no Unicorn."

Ol' Noah looked out through the drivin' rain,
But the Unicorns were hidin' playin' silly games.
They were kickin' and splashin' in the misty morn,
Oh them silly Unicorn.

Then the goat started goatin' and the snake started snakin',
The elephant started elephantin' and the boat started shakin'
The mouse started squeekin' and the lion started roarin'',
And everyone's aboard but the Unicorn.

I mean the green alligators and the long-neck geese,
The humpy bumpy camels and the chimpanzees.
Noah cried, "Close the door, 'cause the rain is pourin' -
And we just can't wait for them Unicorn."

Then the Ark started movin', and it drifted with the tide,
And the Unicorns looked up from the rock and cried.
And the water came up and sort of floated them away -
That's why you've never seen a Unicorn to this day.

You'll see a lot of alligators and a whole mess of geese.
You'll see humpy bumpy camels and lots of chimpanzees.
You'll see catsandratsandelephants, but sure as you're born
You're never gonna see no Unicorn.

[Arugula Latte]

52. It was similar to how Fred Flintstone's car tipped

when the waitress at the drive-in put the rack of Brontosaurus ribs on his car ledge.

[ET Awful]

53. So you're telling me that Noah invented the underwater roll that is now

done by kayakers the world over?

:evilgrin:

[Arugula Latte]

60. Yes, of course. Everyone knows that.

Haven't you heard the term "pulling a Noah" bandied about by serious kayakers?

:evilgrin:

[ET Awful]

62. Not having been around many serious kayakers,no, I can't say as I have

:rofl:

[mshasta]

59. lol

:rofl:

[leftofthedial]

48. An engineer I used to work with is the first Intelligent Designer I met

He's a fundie. I asked him about the 6000-year thing and he was kind of evasive. We debated the ID thing regularly for a couple of years. He steadfastly remained noncommital about full-on creationism.

One night, on a business trip, he had a few glasses of wine with dinner (the only time I ever saw him drink). He was pretty tipsy. I asked him about creationism and he 'fessed up that he thought the world was probably about 8000 years old and that all the evidence to the contrary is either faked by evilpeople who hate god or is in error or otherwise untrustworthy. It became evident that his belief in ID was purely a smokescreen to keep him from having to defend creationism among intelligent people. I overwhelmed him with a flood of solid evidence, he started in on the "science-is-a-religion" line of defense.

How does someone get an advanced degree in Engineering and then deny the basic laws of physics?

[B3Nut]

49. I almost bought it...

...during my fundie daze (sic). But that pesky evidence kept rearing its head. I've come to the inescapable conclusion that young-earth creationists are just insane... :crazy: :rofl:

Todd in Beerbratistan

[Arugula Latte]

51. I had a boss once who turned fundy.

He was an otherwise intelligent man, but his wife flipped, and I think he went along to save the marriage.

He spent a lot of time justifying his dumbass positions -- probably because deep down he knew he was being a moron for swallowing ridiculous fairy tales and holding them up as true.

[AndreaCG]

57. Not exactly

But one of my mother's former coworkers became a born again and no longer believes in dinoaurs. What those big things in the Museum of Natural History are I have no idea...

[momster]

87. What are those things?

Isn't there a section of the Bible -- early on -- that talks about giants? I think Nimrod was one, some giant hunter or other. (Sorry, been a while since I read the book). Maybe the fundamentalists think the dinosaur bones are just mis-assembled giant's bones.

[Nikia]

66. Unfortunately

My husband worked with him. He told us all about it. He even lent us videos. This guy was obviously into the videos because most of his arguements were word for word from the videos. I actually thought the videos were interesting. I liked the cryptozoology type part where it talked about dragons being dinosaurs and that dinosaurs still exist in some secluded areas.

[Ladyhawk]

68. My voice instructor is a creationist, but that's not uncommon

in this county.

I made a joke about punctuated equilibrium to an ear, nose and throat specialist. When he didn't laugh or at least make a remark, I asked him if he knew what I was talking about. He said, "Yes I do, but I don't believe in evolution. I'm a creationist."

Oy.

It's one of those 7th Day Adventist hospitals.

I think my mother is finally coming around to believing in a god-guided form of evolution, but we were taught as children that the earth was at the very most 10,000 years old. Most of my "science" curriculum centered around debunking evolution.

My experience with fundies has been that they are NOT trustworthy. They'll hose you over for Jesus if they get half a chance. After many years of second, third, fourth, fifth, (ad infinitum) chances, I've given up on fundies. I can be friendly with them, but I'll never let one get close again. If you let them get close, it just gives them more of an opportunity to decide exactly where to place the knife in your back.

[really annoyed]

71. Nope

But my mom and I often have interesting and thoughtful conversations about the creation of the Earth - we never fight about it, they are always polite discussions.

I had one friend in high school who brought in The Bible to our biology class though. Sadly, she ended up dropping out of high school. :-(

[PowerToThePeople]

72. I have met Morans before. n/t

[goodboy]

74. An Aunt of mine and her family are hard-core fundies, we got into it one

time about the age of the universe...


With the Hubble telescope, and the Gospels of Satan called "science and mathematics"

We can tell how far away objects are from Earth.

For Example: The Sombrero Galaxy, seen here is 50,000 light-years across and is located 28 million light-years from Earth.

<>

I think this in itself should put the "young earth" creationists' bullshit to bed for good.

[Mutley]

84. But it won't.

When confronted with evidence of any kind that the universe is much much older than they think it is they just say God (or sometimes Satan) skewed the data somehow to test our faith. It's maddening.