Bush and the RW'ers are making a new Bible

[ck4829]

Realizing that the Bible does not actually conform with the ideas of the 'christian' Right and the GOP, the Far Right is making a new Bible and says that all Christians must read and follow the guidelines of this new book.

In this new and improved Bible.

Genesis is now 'The Book of Reagan' which details the Reagan Revolution.

Ronald Reagan comes and does God's bidding and helps out Islamic fanatics who will play a part later in the new Bible.

'The Book of the Elder Bush'

George H.W. Bush does some boring stuff, in the new Bible most of this stuff is just "Blah, blah, blah, blah..."

In the new Bible, Oliver North is God's Holy Warrior who brings down an entire Communist nation with his bare hands.

'The Dark Times'

A satanic minion named Bill Clinton takes over the United States, promising national health care (OMG!!!! MAKE IT STOP!!!) and he makes the country good again. Or does he? He is actually a guy who murdered 10's of 1000's of people, he is working with satanic demons to install a new world order, and he makes joke about YOU behind your back. He must be stopped, and that is why God assembles an army to stop Bill and Hillary, unfortunately they can not stop him, but he is forced out of the White House by the Messiah.

'The Messiah Returns'

George W. Bush battles evil Muslims, kills Bill Clinton's minions, known as the Democratic Party, and more. The New Bible states that the GOP's former allies attacked us and so we went to war with them.

'The Messiah sets up his kingdom'

In 2008, there is a prophecy that George W. Bush will become the new and permanent ruler of America and we won't have to worry about electing a new President of America ever again.

All this and more in the New Bible.

[JNelson6563]

1. Actually they could use the old one

if they just lopped off the New Testament.

Julie

[BringEmOn]

2. The just need to cut out those "red letter" verses.

That Jesus was a liberal commie hippy.