Zarqawi Escapes Iraq 1 hour ago! with bullets in his lungs!

[mopaul]

http://news.scotsman.com/latest.cfm?id=4602367

Today’s statement said al-Zarqawi “was secretly smuggled to a neighbouring country a few days ago in a complicated and organised operation.” It did not identify the country.

It said al-Zarqawi was in “stable condition now” after he incurred a “bullet wound which penetrated his right lung.”

Al-Zarqawi has claimed responsibility for attacks on Iraqi civilians and security forces and kidnappings and beheadings of foreigners, and has a £13.7 million bounty on his head.
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can anyone compile the HUGE list of articles claiming to have captured or injured the immortal zarqawi?

[w13rd0]

1. Apparently alZarqawi...

...is really Rasputin.

[jojo54]

2. "secretly smuggled to a neighbouring country "

Those big jets sure do come in handy for getting certain people out of big jams. Hhmmmm..........

[femmecahors]

3. His powers have surpassed those of the mighty Clenis! n/t

[DistressedAmerican]

4. I Smell Incursion!!! Or is it just diversion...

"Soon, the posting appeared on another militant site, where it quickly came under attack from other posters as untrue and unauthorised by al Qaida."

Wonder who would want to create such an impression?

[mopaul]

5. yes, we'll have to persue him into whatever nation he's hiding in

he's crafty, and he always escapes JUST before the marines arrive.

[Protagoras]

Of course it'll have to be

Syria or Iran...because we wouldn't really want to mess with NK. But Syria Bush is sure he could lick in a fight...if only he had a few more soldiers.

[Protagoras]

11. dupe

Dumb button lag.

[Richard Steele]

6. Coalition officials release Artist's Composite of "Current" alZarqawi...

If you see this man, notify the Internets immediately!

[DistressedAmerican]

8. The Pentagon Has Been Hard At Work On Their Response To This Threat!

[Coexist]

9. you made me laugh out loud at work

how do I explain that!

[DistressedAmerican]

10. SLACKER! Get Back To Work! Your Time Is Their Money!!!

[Coexist]

16. yes sir - sorry sir

[ozymandius]

7. While the Scotsman is a respected daily

I get the sense that they are dealing with embellished data. Hearsay runs rampant in Al-Zarqawi reports.

[Roland99]

12. Does he have a big "S" tattooed on his chest?

[mopaul]

13. just like that, but a Z

[DrDebug]

14. Captured: 560 Injured: 32 Dead: 420

So the captures take the lead.

http://www.google.com/search?q=%22Al-Zarqawi+Captured%22

Let's try some other people:

Osama bin Laden: 7,590 - 5 - 12,100 (Dead)
George Bush: 74 - 5 - 10,900 (Just a hologram as well)
Saddam Hussein: 14,900 - 24 - 3,090 (Captured)

[Roland99]

15. Zarqawi - Bush's man for all seasons

http://www.atimes.com/atimes/Middle_East/FJ15Ak02.html

What had he actually done until 2004? Not much. Unlike bin Laden in 1998, he never issued a declaration of war against Jews and Crusaders. Because Zarqawi may have been in northern Iraq at the time - training Ansar al-Islam fighters - and because he may have traveled to Baghdad in May 2002 to treat his injured, or amputated leg, was evidence enough for Powell to speak of "a sinister nexus between Iraq and the al-Qaeda terrorist network". Powell of course never mentioned two crucial facts: even if Zarqawi was really in northern Iraq, he was in a safe heaven for Iraqi Kurds; and Ansar al-Islam was a mortal enemy of Saddam's Ba'athists. Not to mention the fact that the Pentagon always refused to take out Ansar's base: Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld was not interested in obliterating a perfect pretext for the war. Moreover, Ansar could also be used as an ally against Saddam.

<...>

Where is his "base"? Zarqawi may have found plenty of funds and manpower in Saudi Arabia, especially after the siege of Fallujah in April, as well as in pockets of the Sunni triangle. Tawhid does exist as a movement, it may have as many as 1,000 members. Once again, the majority of the Iraqi resistance refuse to blow up Iraqi policemen or the desperate urban youth queuing up every day to get jobs in the security services. But for Tawhid, any Iraqi collaborating with the occupation in any way is a legitimate target.

<...>

But not a single source, anywhere, claims to have actually seen "Zarqawi" since late 2001 in Afghanistan. Ask the Pentagon. Ask the CIA. Ask the Federal Bureau of Investigation. No one, on the record, is able to independently verify that "Zarqawi" actually exists. There are no photos - only that same CIA-owned black and white. The CIA doesn't even know how tall or how fat "Zarqawi" is. All the literature on "Zarqawi" since late 2001 springs from dubious "confessions" by prisoners and "statements" by all sorts of people claiming to be "Zarqawi".

Even more extraordinary is that everybody and his neighbor is after Zarqawi: the Pentagon; the CIA; the Mukhabarat-lite intelligence services of Allawi; the Mehdi Army of Shi'ite cleric Muqtada al-Sadr; the bombed residents of Fallujah, where he apparently is hiding; not to mention millions of Iraqis who would bless the heavens above for a shot at laying their hands on a $25 million bounty. Just like bin Laden, nobody can find Zarqawi. Why?