Minuteman project

[SammyBlue]

I doubt our rag in tucson has the nuts to publish my letter to editor, but considering that I don't write many and I need to be outraged, I guess I had to. First my letter, then some analysis of it:

To: The Arizona Daily Star
Re: Minuteman project to Expand (4/19/05)

It is with great comfort that I write this letter thanking the Minutemen for their tireless work protecting me from the dangers of brown people run amok. In fact, thank you for the entire conservative movement; without you, homosexuals would be destroying straight marriages by making straight men turn gay and America would be infested with foreigners and other miscreants who don't love the flag, motherhood and apple pie.

Mr. Simcox and Mr. Gilchrist are doing a fantastic job protecting Arizonans from the horrors of brown-ness gone foul that they are planning to expand their endeavor into other states, including two on the northern border. What a great concept! In fact, they, according to Tuesday's Star, chose Michigan and Idaho. Fantastic! What great states to start controlling the Canadian menace. . .one state's border with Canada is apx. 40 miles long, the other is a WATER border where the only land touching Canada is the I-75 bridge at Sault Ste. Marie! Fabulous. Of the over 3600 miles of Canadian border, including the 1200 miles of Alaska, Simcox and Gilchrist will be protecting less than 5% of it, and a majority of that 5% is a water border where Lakes Michigan, Huron and Superior meet!

Keep up the good work lads. . .you are proving that racists and bigots with too much time on their hands who start vigilante border watch groups, muttering incoherent slogans about soverignity and freedom can prove to be just as foolish as the ones who wear brown shirts and white robes.

My letter came after a neighbor basically told me that I was wrong about the Minuteman project. It is not racist. They are protecting the northern border too. So, I should shut my "American-hating liberal mouth and leave protecting America to real Americans."

For course my neighbot lost the argument, and I will proceed to explain why below:

For those of you who don't know, two wingnuts, Chris Simcox and James Gilchrist, have approached and are attempting the execute a volunteer border watch program known as the MINUTEMAN PROJECT. Basically, people will volunteer to help the Border Patrol by calling in illegal migrants who jump the border when they are seen. The Minutemen are supposed to do nothing except be an extra set of eyes for the Border Patrol. Oh, yes. . .they are also armed; and have little, if any, oversight. We just have to trust that they do their jobs.

Of course, the morning Clear Channel talk radio DJ Dave Skyler on KNST loves this project. This self-described failed musician who was "making music during the Clinton years," who states that we must respect Bush because he is our president and not call him what my father did on his radio show ("a nincompoop") even though his ilk spent eight years demonizing Bill Clinton (hypocrasy anyone?), claims that this Minuteman Project is the best thing since sliced bread and the invention of the wheel. He has repeatedly hung up on my father and me when we completely destroy what little logic he uses to make his argument.

Anyway, Gilchrist and Simcox are now making plans to move their idiotic project to California, New Mexico and Texas on the Southern Border and Idaho and Michigan on the northern border. So here is where the fun starts:

According to my National Geographic Maps, these are the apx mileages of the state borders with Canada:

AK -- 1200 miles
MT -- 560 miles
ME -- 500 miles
WA -- 425 miles (including the water surrounding Victoria Island)
MN -- 400 miles
ND -- 300 miles
NY -- 175 miles (including the Niagara River border) <my home state and my home area>
MI -- 125 miles (all of it water where three Great Lakes meet)
VT -- 100 miles
ID -- 40 miles
NH -- 25 miles

Okay, my math is bad, so according to my calculator, that is 3855 miles of border. Let's round it up to 3900. So, these Minutemen will be protecting about 165 miles of Righteous, wholesome American border goodness from the hordes of Canadian barbarians from the north. That's apx. 4.2% of the border with Canada. Just to prove that they are not bigotted against brown people, they are putting their agents of racism and hatred on 165 miles of border. . .125 of it being water.

But, let's be fair (and balanced). . .of the 3900 miles of US/Canadian border, 355 whole miles of it is a water border, and the Minutemen will be protecting 125 miles of that. . .so, of an impassable, ice cold water border, the Minutemen will be protecting apx. 35% of that. That's better. We all know it's easy to swim across ice cold Great Lakes water that merchantmen ship use all the time!

When they go into NY, I'm sure Canadian will try to swim across the Niagara River at the Gorge, or the Whirlpool. Or down by the Lewiston Bridge, where the riptides and undercurrent will plant you somewhere between Hamilton and Toronto because you can exhale.

So, these minutemen will claim civic pride and are working to shore up the borders and protect America. Excuse me while I yawn. Ummm. . .stuff it up your ass. You picked two of the four states with the smallest border with Canada. And that's supposed to give you validity???

You went to Michigan and Idaho to recruit like minded militia members. The Aryan brotherhood, founded by Richard Butler (may he rest in hell, though Jews like me don't believe in Hell), are based out of Northern Idaho in Coeur d'Alene (in a city named after an indian tribe). Timothy McVeigh was part of the Michigan militia in the UP of Michigan. No wonder the Minutemen want to go there. They will have great recruits to protect us from. . .um, Canadians.

Is anyone as disgusted with this bullshit as I am? When is this shit going to end?

[LisaM]

1. Good post, one correction

The milita group that Timothy McVeigh belonged to was in the thumb area of Michigan, NOT in the U.P.

[entanglement]

2. WTF!? That's outrageous!! #!@**$%$%#?

Just kidding, I'll only eat :popcorn: drink :beer: and I'm even willing to share my :donut: with everyone else who battles it out in this thread. :P

[oneighty]

3. You will sleep better

knowing that for a few minutes almost every day I gard a small section of the New York/Canadian boarder. So far I have not seen even one Canadian swimming across the lake neither nor walking on the ice too as well.

So dunot worrie veri muche as yu slepp.

180

[JitterbugPerfume]

4. yew ar a gud amurikan

Mr Gard

[walldude]

5. They picked a good name..

It leaves me wondering if they are talking about their sexual prowess or their patriotism. This will last until one of these psycho's shoots someone. Probably another "Minuteman" by accident.
I for one am sleeping better at night knowing there are some real Patriots keeping me safe from the dangerous terrorists, I mean Mexicans, I mean Canadians... awww forget it.