Dennis for Pope!!

[Clark2008]

Not... not Kucinich.

This guy: http://home.insightbb.com/~dennisforpope/platform.html

Here's some highlights of his campaign:

In order to stimulate the global economy, I will lower the standard tithing rate from 10% to 9%. And no, there will not be a lower rate applied to income from stock dividends and capital gains. There is no place for trickle-down economics in a church.

I also think that some changes are needed in the area of sex education. When I was in high school, this class was taught by a celibate priest! I guess in this case the saying is true: “Those who can’t do, teach.” I propose that only those with actual experience and knowledge be permitted to teach the subject.

In the past, the College of Cardinals has often chosen one of its own as the new Pope. This is believed to be due to the dearth of qualified candidates willing to take the position, rather than any sort of inside deals or corruption. In fact, it sometimes takes weeks for the cardinals to convince one of their number to assume the papacy, and even then the “winner” often breaks down and weeps (in the aptly named “Crying Room”) when he realizes he will have to work for free. The aforementioned salary eliminates this problem, but also necessitates tighter controls on the election process to avoid the appearance of impropriety. Therefore, when my successor is chosen, I will require that any cardinal who wishes to run for Pope must disqualify himself as an elector. Otherwise, the Vatican conclave could degenerate into a political struggle like an episode of “Survivor.”

In 2003, a gay man became the Episcopalian Church’s Bishop of New Hampshire. This seemingly inconsequential event became the lead story in the U.S. news for nearly an entire week. Meanwhile, Catholics could not understand what all the fuss was about. We have had gay bishops for centuries, and it is not a big deal! Because the Church is already so progressive on this issue, I don’t plan any changes.

:rofl:

[Vektor]

1. Hahah - I like him!

I especially like his stance on the communion chips.