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I figure there are a few different factors all working in tandem.
The first is that no country (i.e., the majority of its citizens) wants to give up territory. Split up Iraq, and you presumably have Syrian, Turkish, and probably Iranian Kurds wanting out of their current arrangements, as well as, arguably, the Shi'a Arabs in Iran's SW and Sa'udi Arabia's NE. Those Shi'a Arabs sit on a lot of oil that S.A. and Iran would begrudge.
These countries call for Chechen independence, but don't want Christians in the S. of Sudan to split off. The religious and ethnic fault lines are obvious.
Then there's the drive for stability so valued by China and the EU. Free? Not a problem. Unstable? Massive problem. Splitting up countries in the Middle East would pose the dilemma of why it's ok there, but not elsewhere. France wasn't built on one ethnicity, neither was Spain, Austria, or even Germany, as they engaged in cultural homogenization and abolition of the cultural identity of their minorities--Bretagnes, Catalan, Basques, Sorbs, Slovenes ... Then there's Africa, where the ethnicities are even more numerous.
The instability caused by splitting up ME countries would undoubtedly lead to war and ethnic cleansing. This isn't a bad thing, necessarily, since it can make for fewer ethnic tensions after a while: separating out Poles/Germans, Czechs/Germans, Italians/Slovenes, Greeks/Turks was a mixed bag, yielding more stability now in spite of the ethnic cleansing at the time; not separating out Hungarians/Slovaks or Bulgarians/Turks wasn't a good move, history shows. And we'll ignore the split up of Tito's Yugoslavia. But the Shi'a and Sunni Arabs are mixed together, as well as the Turks/Kurds and Kurds/Arabs ... and that's just Iraq.
In addition to the political upheaval, we'd have economic chaos: Who'd honor the old contracts and debts? How would loyalties play out? And what do you do with all the little countries that would be formed, but may have insurmountable economic hurdles? And how would the distribution of resources from what used to be unified countries work--Sunni Arabs sit mostly on desert, Shi'a have lots of oil, Kurds want Kirkuk so they can have oil, too. The Sunni Arabs wouldn't like giving up their source of wealth.
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