How To Make A Republican Tell The Truth

[Plaid Adder]

I heard this from someone else over the weekend and it is brilliant:

It works just like the Salada Tea Bags lines, or that game people play with cookie fortunes, where you add the words "between the sheets" to make a meaningless platitude much more interesting.

All you have to do in order to make Republican domestic policies make sense is take their talking point and add the words "...if you're rich!"

For instance: "Privatizing social security makes a lot of sense...if you're rich!"

Or, "Our health care system is the best in the world...if you're rich!"

Or how about, "The economy under Bush is the strongest it's ever been...if you're rich!"

Just add three little words, and all of a sudden, these bastards are telling the truth.

It's most fun if you do it in a group with one person beginning the talking point and everyone else finishing it in unison. I think it coudl be productively adapted as a protest tactic for some of those Social Security meet-ups Santorum and friends are doing now, for instance.

Whee,

THe Plaid Adder

[dave123williams]

1. Very nice :)

[mwb970]

2. Brilliant! Thanks for the idea. (n/t)

[Extend a Hand]

3. I *Love* it

LOL. I'm going to play everyday!

[bryant69]

4. That's very cool

And it works too.

Bryant
check it out --> http://politicalcomment.blogspot.com

[Plaid Adder]

11. The thing is it does not work as well with foreign policy.

Cause that bullshit don't make sense for NOBODY.

"Hey, invading a country with a lot of oil and then failing to retain control of it long enough to start pumping it out is a great plan...if you're rich! Oh, no, wait, it's still not. OK, hang on...it's a great plan...uh...if you're insane! No...wait...here we go...U.S. foreign policy is making the world a lot better and more conducive to the spread of our power and influence...if you're Al Qaeda!"

Sigh,

The Plaid Adder

[smoogatz]

30. It's not your fault the oil grab is failing.

Using an army of immigrants and working class kids to snatch the world's second-largest oil reserves IS a great idea--if you're rich!

[Don1]

71. ESSI Stock Option Exercises

Actually, the first one still does work. You forgot about stock option exercises of defense contractors:
http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=102&topic_id=1259583&mesg_id=1262294

I cannot see how to make the others work, though.

[ComerPerro]

5. So, all along, they have been telling the truth

They have just been secretly adding "If you're rich" after things they say.

[RaleighNCDUer]

45. They're not secretely adding it.

In their circles, it is simply assumed.

[ArkDem]

6. Unbelievably clever and original.

[Vickers]

7. That's a great idea...

...IF YOU'RE RICH!

:P

Just kidding, it *is* a great idea.

[Rabrrrrrr]

8. Or "if you're an evil rich uncaring shriveled-soul white piece of shit"

But "if you're rich" is easier and quicker. :-)

Seriously, though, that's a brilliant addendum!

Also could just add "but of course, I'm lying".

[hfojvt]

18. so people like Armstrong Williams and Joseph Perkins

do not count because they are Republican shills who happen to be black?

Actually, the most insidious thing they do is tell the truth. They tell partial truths, and narrow the focus and use true statistics to hide their lies. The whole business of "people at the bottom get the largest percentage tax cut" was technically true, but so what? $300 is a larger percentage of $1200 than $1.6 million is of $6 million, but you still have one person getting as much as 5000. It was a good tax cut ... if you're rich.

[not fooled]

58. brilliant "adder-endum" NOM

[bloom]

9. that is perfect.

:)

[cally]

10. I like it!

I'm going to use it. :bounce:

[Oreo]

12. We're winning the war on terror.... if you're rich.

We have the strongest democracy in the world...if you're rich.

Good call! It does work!

Somebody needs to get a bunch of administration quotes and add "if you're rich"

[Commie Pinko Dirtbag]

20. Support the troops... if you're rich

Mmmmm. That was cryptical. Many hidden meanings there. Nice!

[smoogatz]

28. No--it works.

Reach people support the troops. Poor people ARE the troops. Get it?

[Warpy]

13. Thanks, I'll be adding this to the other stuff I do.

Pointing out how so much of what they believe is unchristian seems to work the best for now.

[Jamastiene]

14. You could also add

other words to make it seem like they are telling the truth.
Here is one:
Saddam Hussein has obtained weapons of mass destruction...because my daddy kept the receipts.

[GOPBasher]

15. That's awesome, but there are a couple exceptions:

the budget crisis is horrible for everyone, even the rich. And the environment is being destroyed, which is bad for everyone, including the rich. But for the most part, I love it!

[hfojvt]

22. a destroyed environment is not going to bother the rich as much

They can afford bottled water, and air purifiers and they do not have to work out in the sun. Budget crises and stock market crashes are not bad if you sell short. In the movie "It's a Wonderful Life" was Potter hurt very bad by the Great Depression?
The budget crisis is an excuse to slash social programs and add to the "reserve army of the unemployed" and desperate to work under any conditions and for any wages. Are we slashing spending on the MIC (Military Industrial Complex)?

[smoogatz]

29. Oh, please...

First of all, if you're a Republican, there is no budget crisis, and the environment is just fine, thank you--all that global warming stuff is just a wild conspiracy theory started by scientists so they could get lucrative grants to study it. And mercury? It's really not that bad for you. In fact, Bush's tax cuts, which are the source of the budget crisis, are fantastic--if you're rich! Relaxing environmental regulation and ignoring global warming are great for the bottom line--if you're rich!

[GOPBasher]

31. I think Global Warming will hurt us all, including the rich.

[smoogatz]

32. You still don't get it.

The rich will all move to Montana and live in gigantic, air-conditioned megahomes. They'll mine the exposed mineral seams of Antarctica and buy up beach-front property in places that are currently miles from the ocean. The rich will make the best of it. They could give a shit.

[GOPBasher]

33. Okay, you got me. Good points. nt

[tavalon]

39. Not today though

and why worry about tomorrow, if you're rich!?

[Liberty Belle]

51. The budget has tax cuts--for the rich!

[melissinha]

16. So true

The reason this tactic works is because the people who truly understand what he is doing intuitively know that anyway.

Its the dumbo poor sheeple who want to keep the standards for the rich because they believe that they will actually someday become part of the priveledged club, and want those benefits to be available when that happens.

We see it differently, we know that the profits and the spoils of the rich were earned upon the back of the poor and foreign labor, therefore we feel that the least we could do is distribute that wealth that we know was achieved by others in the economy pyramid.

[BrotherBuzz]

24. The philosophy of Horatio Alger, Jr. is alive and well...

If you're rich.....;)

[Dyedinthewoolliberal]

17. What a great idea,,,,,,,

if you're rich :)

[Norquist Nemesis]

19. The average citizen does not consider him/herself rich

so, this is PERFECT! :toast:

[ClayZ]

21. I will put that in my Bag of Tools! Thanks!

A Bag of Tools by R. Lee Sharpe

Isn't it strange how princes and kings,
and clowns that caper in sawdust rings,
and common people, like you and me,
are builders for eternity?

Each is given a list of rules;
a shapeless mass; a bag of tools.
And each must fashion, ere life is flown,
A stumbling block, or a Stepping-Stone.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

63. That little poem is so wonderful!

Every now and then I get a catalog from some fancy woodworker (whose name escapes me, natch); one recent catalog had a poem very like this one! But this poem was a bit different, and the author was unknown. The gentleman writing the prose about the poem stated that he found it a converted church in East Dresden, Maine.
It's a truly wonderful sentiment, and one I try to keep in mind as I proceed through my life. Thank you for posting it.

[big peaches]

23. Bravo!

I also so often find myself finishing many of this administration's talking points by shouting "if you're heterosexual!"

[proud patriot]

25. I like it

:thumbsup: I'll use it

[mattclearing]

26. Fantastic n/t

[sendero]

27. What's funny about this little trick..

... is that it actually works! It turns a phrase of dubious truthfulness into one that is absolutely true!

Good work!

[BigBearJohn]

34. I will use it!!!

[ktowntennesseedem]

35. A lot of Repubs I know would say,

"...and if you're not rich, it's only because you're lazy."

Except, or course, for those who voted * because of their religious convictions, most of whom aren't rich but certainly wouldn't consider themselves lazy. They would say his policies are good because they will end abortions, put prayer back in school and save our society from homosexual cartoon sea creatures.

So to be as inclusive as possible, perhaps the phrase should be, "...unless your rich or stupid!"

[ComerPerro]

42. My comeback to that usually is

"Then you must be incredibly lazy"

[ktowntennesseedem]

49. Mentally lazy, absolutely.

Some I know are in fact too stupid to pick the winner of a one-horse race, but the rest are just too lazy to think through everything they believe or say they believe. It's just too simple to repeat a phrase or two from their conservative mantra, and avoid all deep, heavy thought.

[Tactical Progressive]

36. That is brilliant

Republicans just three words short of the truth.

Brilliant, and useful.

Thank you Plaid Adder.

[Hamsta1]

37. Works great, except

when you get them on the subject of corporate responsibility. Then they're just dirty, dirty liars. Just change it to the flip-side and you're back on track...

"We have got to have greater accountability and we're cracking down on fraud... UNLESS you're rich!"

[DeusIrae]

38. Help us shift the paradigm Plaid

I love it Plaid! All your stuff just busts me up. You really are a stitch!
Why don't you give us something that will defy this paradigm of us being the antithesis of Bush. If we really want to move, we need to shed this persona of the 'Anti' party and market our own agenda.
I know I said 'market', but I think that is what needs to be done.
I'm just tired of being reactionary. I want to go back to the days when righties laid awake at night fearing what unconventional method us socially minded folks might come up with next to take our message to the street.
Linc
:kick:

[fiddlestix]

40. OMG, you are psychic!

I used this approach yesterday, how did you know?

I belong to 2 other online "communities"...people from ALL over the country, mostly women, mostly from the South, mostly Bush lovers...these boards both started out as exercise, dieting, health kinds of places...and they still are, but have branched out into posts about all the other stuff that we deal with day to day...

I almost left both sites after the election...I was so angry that my cyber friends could be so..."misguided" & I did take a little vacation to calm myself...but decided to stick it out, keep the communication going...

ANYWAYS, yesterday, there was a post, "my husband will be forced to pay for his own health insurance as of March 2nd, his company was paying for it...don't know where I'm going to find $500/month more for health insurance?" She ended the post with this..."I will not give into worry but lay this at Gods feet and trust His will." You don't even have to wonder who she voted for...lol

To which I posted..."Too bad we don't have universal health care or some sort of subsidized plan so that all Americans would have coverage, not just THE RICH or those lucky enough to have jobs that still offer it...perhaps you could write your local elected officals for suggestions?"

And I did that yesterday, lol...btw, she is the total package, Evangelical, Rapture Ready, Bush Lover..."I trust GOD!"

[Gidney N Cloyd]

41. It almost works on the Bill of Rights, too:

Coming soon to a constitution near you:

"Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the government for a redress of grievances. IF YOU'RE RICH"

[Occulus]

61. The dirty little secret is...

...most of that is that way already......

[Anakin Skywalker]

43. Makes a Lot of Sense.

It's true! It's damn true!

[Vox_Reason]

44. Good stuff!

Reminds me of one of my favorite bumper stickers:

"I'm not rich enough to vote Republican".

[Q3JR4]

46. Plaid Adder,

as usual :yourock:.

[AnneD]

47. It does for politics...

what Bullshit bingo does for staff meetings....yehaaa

[Disturbed]

48. Getting rid of public education is no big deal ...

if you're rich.

[mcscajun]

50. Oh man, this is Priceless!

It's also going to be great to use in "finishing sentences" with Republican relatives and friends. :)

If I get to keep any after the first month or so of using this item. :P

Did I mention I Love this place? Almost every day a new idea.

:evilgrin:

[Robeson]

52. The War In Iraq Makes Sense....

....If You're Rich!

Hey, I get it now!

[On Par]

53. Clear Cutting Our Forests Is An Agricultural Windfall....

...if you're rich!

OP

[DawgHouse]

54. Thanks for the tip! n/t

[AwakeAtLast]

55. So easy to do!

This will be in my arsenal, thanks PA! :hi:

[KoKo]

56. ROFL! True...."If You're Rich!" But...everyone thinks they ARE RICH

on the Right. All that "home equity" you know. :D

[paineinthearse]

57. protest tactic for some of those Social Security meet-ups ....

But I'm from Massachusetts and there are no rethug meet-ups here!!!! Should I be sad? Guess I'll have to go to NH to heckle.

[Rainscents]

59. I love it!!! Thanks PA!!!

[Occulus]

60. Fantastic.

Take a bow- that was very well said!

[Dave Reynolds]

62. Much better idea than mine...

...which was to hood them, put wires on their genitals and make them stand on boxes until they confessed....

[EFerrari]

64. Genius, pure genius. Are you available for weddings?

It is so much about the words, isn't it?

Thanks, PA

[liberal N proud]

65. Ain't that the truth?

All things are good from the repuke point of view, if you are rich.

[calimary]

66. Hit another one outta the ballpark, Plaid - THIS IS GREAT!

Sure makes it easier to reframe the debate. AND get the last word. AND shut down the opposition. AND maybe... just maybe... get a few people to start thinking.

The "...UNLESS you're rich" is a good complement to this, also.

Just remember to REPEAT-REPEAT-REPEAT! Repetition is key. Really helps hammer the point home. Besides, it helps turn this into a habit - a very good and useful one, at that.

And BTW - Welcome to DU to all the newer ones on this thread!

[tomreedtoon]

67. And as for the evangelicals....

Life's problems are no worry. Place all your worries, concerns and thoughts in the hands of God...IF YOU'RE RICH!

"But God accepts all worries..."

...IF YOU'RE RICH!

Plaid Adder, thank you. Your three little words, if everyone uses them diligently and often, may have saved our country and world.

[Kber]

68. Really funny

if you're rich!

[ucmike]

69. maybe the repubs mumble it under their breath...

i was telling people before the election that the only reason to vote for the connecticut cowboy was if you were already a multi-millionaire. (being a regular millionaire isn't a guaranteee in nj)

[tomfodw]

70. True but not going to help us much

The problem with this is, simply (albeit truthfully) labeling the Bush administration as exclusively on the side of the rich is not the absolute condemnation we liberals think it is. Most Americans, for whatever reason, don't appear to give a damn. The right wing and their gelded press have successfully turned such accurate descriptions of George W. Bush into a positive for their man. When we point out that he doesn't really give much of a damn about anything but his wealthy owners, they shriek "Class warfare!" as if that were enough to discredit the criticism of their boy. And America bobs its head up and down in slavish agreement.

Also, many many Americans apparently think of themselves as, if not rich, then potentially rich. They don't want to soak the members of a group they have every intention of joining. And you can't point out to them how unlikely it is that they will achieve this aim. Optimism and hope are good things, but not at the expense of realism - or of being used, manipulated, discarded when your usefulness is over, and sneeered at all along.

Plaid Adder is 100% correct, and it's good for us to keep this salient fact in mind (as if we did not already know it), but its political utility is extremely limited. People in America admire the rich and protect them. They don't want to undermine them - they want to join them.

[elehhhhna]

72. Exception: "Some people say..." should still be followed by

Between the sheets.

Watch for "Sources close to the President (between the sheets)..." as well.

[The White Tree]

73. So True So True - I love it

Thanks I'm passing that on to Freinds and Family.:yourock:

[FunkyLeprechaun]

74. Republican response to "..if you're rich"

From DumbLaws

w1nch: Right out of the ultra-liberal demorat playbook... Next..

Dusty Bottoms: I just had to correct this one. I wont work for other countries.
Examples:

° Our health care system is the best in the world... if you're in America!
° The economy under Bush is the strongest it's ever been... if you're in America!

° We have the strongest democracy in the world... if you're in America!

° We're winning the war on terror... if you're in America!

[ltfranklin]

76. "Republican response to "..if you're rich""

Perhaps the phrase we're hearing from Republicans, under their breath, when they utter such magnanamous platitudes is:

Our health care system is the best in the world...to poop on!
The economy under Bush is the strongest it's ever been...to poop on!
We support our Veterans...to poop on!
We support our Police and Firemen...to poop on!


(Thanks and a tip of the hat to everyone's favorite talking dog!)

[rocktivity]

75. Sounds like what I say on the subject of military benefits ("If you live")

and partial birth abortion ("no such thing.")

:headbang:
rocknation

[dweller]

77. Stephanie Miller just read part of your thread

the part about adding 'if you're rich' etc...
and attributed it to you on her show. :D

she also said DU was her favorite website. :bounce:


waytago Plaid Adder!

dp

[Plaid Adder]

78. Uh...smack me with a halibut for not knowing, but...

...who's Stephanie Miller?

The Plaid Adder

[dweller]

79. Jones Radio Network

look at the top of the Latest page for a feed.
It was just recently added to the Listen Live group.
I pick her up on WCHL 1360AM 9-12am M-F.

Stephanie has mentioned DU several times in the past, but she read part of your thread here, and mentioned you as the author.

:thumbsup:
dp