If someone asked you to sign a petition against same-sex marriage....

[Sephirstein]

Would you take it and rip it to shreds?

[Fixated]

1. ....

Nope, I'd stab them. But failing that, yes.

[Sweetpea]

2. No...I would snatch it out of their hands, stuff it down their throat

and kick them in the stomcah.;-)

[arwalden]

3. I'd Be Tempted To Do Just That...

... but legally... it's THEIR PERSONAL PROPERTY.

And... I'm guessing it's a safe bet to assume that if they are collecting signatures in opposition to gay and lesbian legal unions... then they are VERY LIKELY to be litigious as well.

-- Allen

[patdem]

4. Give a false name so their petition proves to be invalid!

same as tearing it to shreds IMHO! :bounce:

[DBoon]

15. Better

It will also invalidate the signatures they got AFTER yours.

[DBoon]

16. May I suggest some fake names to use?

Oscar Wilde
Walt Whitman
Alan Turing
Brian Epstein
James Baldwin
Benjamin Britten
Langston Hughes
Ludwig Wittgenstein

[bicentennial_baby]

5. Nah

I'd just "accidentally" spill my entire cup of coffee all over it.

[TahitiNut]

6. That'd be unlawful.

As would signing fraudulently. My personal integirity is not for sale. No, I'd merely try to use up so much of their time and attention that they'd be slowed in gathering more signatures. (If my coffee happened to spill on it, well, that's life.)

[mitchtv]

7. I'd tell them "I have to ask my husband first"

. then ask them if they were wearing underwear.

[demnan]

8. No, I wouldn't impose on their free speech rights however

I wouldn't sign it.

[redeye]

9. Nah...

...but the "I'll have to ask my husband" solution sounds nice here.

[Solly Mack]

10. I might sign it Ima Doofus

I'd actually snarl at the person to tell them to get a life...

[Demobrat]

11. I live in the bohemian section of San Francisco.

I would just laugh and say good luck.

[Racenut20]

12. Same Sex Marriage

The problem I see with this issue, is that if we (the democrats) nominate either Kerry or Dean, that the Republicans will attempt to focus the 204 campaign on it. More of the "big sucker" moves that Atwater pulled on the Dukikas campaign. Can you remember anything of that campaign except pollution in Boston harbour, Willie Horton, or the tank photo? What were his programs and what did he stand FOR????

I can assure you, after the 00 campaign for Governor of Florida, the RNC has an unbelievable amount of money to use to spread lies and misinformation. ie. 50,000 phone calls two days before the election into Miami implying McBride is gay.

If you think the 2000 campaign here was dirty, it didn't hold a candle to 02.

I do enjoy reading your spirit and enthusiasm for these candidates, but I honestly feel Senator Graham, General Clark, or other midwest or southern candidates would not have to spend time and money fighting that battle. (wow, I am long winded. have some more caffine, Ref).

[DrFunkenstein]

13. I'd Sign A Petition To Kill All Wizards

From Leviticus:

20:13 If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them."

20:27 A man also or woman that hath a familiar spirit, or that is a wizard, shall surely be put to death: they shall stone them with stones: their blood shall be upon them.

http://www.skepticsannotatedbible.com/lev/20.html#13

Everybody must get stoned!

[MercutioATC]

24. Or if it was a woman at the door, give her THIS little biblical treasure:

http://www.skepticsannotatedbible.com/1tim/index.html

I REALLY think the part about women being subservient would be expecially gratifying to show to a freeper-woman.

[bearded_cat]

14. I would ask them why the concept bothered them enough

to spend a great deal of energy on trying to get this accomplished. I would ask them if they don't have better things to do with their time than use it to push their beliefs on others. I would ask them who brainwashed them into thinking it was an appropriate goal? I would ask them why they are not spreading a petition to end homelessness and hunger? I would ask them why they care more for their particular belief system than the person down the street that needs immediate help? I would, politely, ask them to leave me the fuck alone.

[RebelOne]

17. Nope

I'd just tell them no, since I have no preference on this issue. I could care less what one's sexual orientation is.

[Touchdown]

18. I would scream "Blasphemers!"

"Heretics and Philistines!" Then I would drop to the floor and convulse in incoherent language to attract as many mall walkers as possible. Get up, dust myself off, and say as loud as I can..."No thanks, I'm not an America Hater, who gives aid and comfort to our enemies." and walk behind the Orange Julius and Cinnabon and watch them get chased out!:evilgrin:

[Pepperbelly]

19. I have a tangent ... a question ... maybe rhetorical but ??

Why do the homophobes always discuss having the "homosexual agenda" "jammed down our throats?"

[bearded_cat]

21. Because they're homophobes

No other explanation needed that I can see.

It's like when you buy a certain car - all of a sudden it seems you see them everywhere - everyone owns my car! When people are brainwashed with some bullshit, it floats around in their brain until they see the dreaded whatever everywhere. Must stop homosexuals from taking over the country!!!! I'm not homosexual, but the thought processes of these cretins intrigues me.

[Skittles]

20. no

I believe in the right for people to petition. I WOULD, however, tell them to F*** OFF because I'm am NOT against gay marriage.

[alfredo]

22. If it was a guy, I say yes if he agreed to kiss me.

[MercutioATC]

25. Friggin' hysterical, alfredo!

I REALLY hope they come to your door...

[NashVegas]

23. Nope

I'd just laugh at them and walk away.

[mandyky]

26. While I am pro civil unions, I am neither

for or against same sex marraige. I realize some folks see marraige as a religious issue. That is probably exactly what I would say if anyone wanted me to sign a petition against gay marraige.

[LWolf]

27. No.

I would say, "No thanks, I'm pro-marriage-choice supporter."

[laylah]

28. Actually I

would probably say "God love ya" and then ask them to bend over so that I might reinsert the pen :evilgrin:

[disgruntella]

29. brainstorming some comebacks:

(none of which I'll remember when I need to, probably)

1) It's none of my business when two people choose to marry, and none of yours either. {{raspberry}}

2) I'll have to ask my girlfriend first. We're getting married next week, would you like to come?

3) Strange that other people's intimate lives are that important to you -- Not getting much at home? (men only -- must live dangerously!)

4) Get a @&*($&*! LIFE!!!!

My personal prediction: #4 (hopefully preceded or followed by some coherent argument on my part)

[Sentath]

30. Nahh *evil grin*

But! (tt?)

I would (set up next to / accompany) them and talk tolerance and peace.

[jmm]

31. No. If I ripped it to shreds

then they'd just go and tell all their homophobe friends about the crazy heathen they ran into. I'd only be making all same-sex marriage supporters look bad by doing so.

[amazona]

32. I'd just tell 'em to go to hell

I wouldn't rip it to sheds...there is probably some value in collecting a list of names of psycho gay-haters.

However, living in south Louisiana...even my close wingnut friends are aghast at the anti-gay marriage thing and have even raised the issue, cautiously, as if afraid someone was going to naysay them..."Who is it hurting to let gay couples get married and be able to get on each other's health insurance plans?"

I really believe the anti-gay hysteria is going to hurt the far right in the long run. Every large family, right or left, has an out-of-the-closet gay or lesbian family member by now.

Or is this just New Orleans speaking?

[Vitruvius]

33. No -- ripping it up would be illegal. Chewing the bum out is legal,

fun, and good for the idiot's soul. If he has one.