A Tale of Two Bridal Registries: Prince William & Kate Middleton, Kris Humphries & Kim Kardashian

[Amerigo Vespucci]

The world loves to shower a bride-to-be with good wishes and presents. And many soon-to-be-wed couples actually do need help setting up house. This may be the first time in a man or woman's life that the desire for bundt pans and matching towels has ever kicked in. Hence one of the single greatest achievements of the modern era -- the wedding registry. In my lifetime alone, the registry has all but wiped out the old joke about getting five blenders, and replaced the ugly tchotchkes you didn't ask for with the ones you did. The registry is an opportunity to tell those near and dear to you that you need forks, or that you're already pretty well fixed for toasters.

And what do Kris Humphries, NBA forward, Kim Kardashian, a daughter of a famous lawyer who was born with a silver spoon in her mouth, want for their wedding? $1,250 silver serving spoons.

Their registry, from Gearys of Beverly Hills, looks to be legit – the couple was spotted at the emporium earlier this week, and some of the lower priced items, like the $200 stainless steel Christofle place settings and $46 Williams Yeoward martini glasses, are already being snapped up. But plenty of items, like the $520 Torchon butter server, $1,650.00 coffeepot and $7,850.00 Baccarat vase are still up for grabs. Grand total for the whole works? $172,000. Why, that's more than some people make in a whole month, you guys. They're also reportedly registering at Williams-Sonoma, because what they need is more stuff.

A wedding is rarely a time of great restraint. And the words "Kardashian" and "austerity" have never appeared in the same sentence. But when the rich and famous Prince William and Kate Middleton were engaged, they figured maybe they already all the butter knives they could possibly wish for, and asked for something else. They set up a special fund earmarked for 26 of their favorite charities, including EarthWatch, the Association for Children's Palliative Care, Beat Bullying, and the Army Widows Association.

http://www.salon.com/entertainment/tv/reality_tv/index.html?story=/ent/tv/feature/2011/06/15/kim_kardashian_kris_humphries_wedding_registry

[Raster]

1. Kim "My daddy was OJ's accomplice" Kardashian....that Kardashian?

Simpson stayed in Kardashian's house during the days following the murders of Nicole Brown Simpson and Ronald Goldman. Kardashian was the man seen carrying Simpson's garment bag the day that Simpson flew back from Chicago. Prosecutors speculated that the bag may have contained Simpson's bloody clothes or the murder weapon.

[Name removed]

2. Deleted message

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[PCIntern]

4. That's where the garment bag was hidden...

oops, did I just say that...

[Botany]

3. Well at least it some useful ... tochon butter spreader

[Warpy]

This is why flashy new money usually dies broke.

If we get the tax code back the way it's supposed to be, it will hasten the process.

If we don't get the tax code back the way it's supposed to be, this country is finished. It will be the same aristocratic system our ancestors all fled.

[Beaverhausen]

5. I will never understand why anyone wastes one second paying attention to the Kardashians

really, I don't get it. Who the fuck are those people?

[indepat]

6. Me thinks they think they are really special

;)

[Stuckinthebush]

7. I have no idea. Famous for being famous?

I honestly don't know where they come from or what they have done that gives them celebrity status. I'd love an explanation.

[Amerigo Vespucci]

8. Kim made a sex tape with Moesha's little brother that featured them peeing on each other.

MONEY talks for Kim Kardashian. The daughter of one of the O.J. Simpson team lawyers has dropped her suit against Vivid Entertainment over the release of her sex tape co-starring rapper Ray J., in exchange for $5 million. "We've always wanted to work something out with Kim so she could share in the profits," Vivid co-chairman Steven Hirsch told avn.com. What a difference three months makes; after Vivid bought the tape from a "third party" for $1 million, Kardashian sued for invasion of privacy in February, claiming that selling it was "despicable" and "malicious."

http://www.nypost.com/p/pagesix/item_k4U38GcyWUjEW2TRrBK5zK;jsessionid=9557645E32F43E2BC4E0D86B1500585A

[Stuckinthebush]

9. Oh. Gross

Who is Moesha?

[Amerigo Vespucci]

10. Brandy Norwood, singer and star of the (now-canceled) sitcom "Moesha"

"Ray J" is her little brother, a wannabe "rapper" piece of shit who calls himself a "starmaker"...in a recent interview he said that the sex tape made Kardashian a star (which it did), but this worthless little fuck sees that as an "accomplishment."

[Stuckinthebush]

11. Oh!

Wow. And this made the Kardashian a star? How twisted.

[Zoeisright]

12. It's all a question of class.

Of which the Kardashians have none.