Barbie The Hot Pagan Witch -- Morford

[Khephra]

Barbie The Hot Pagan Witch
It's the bimbo blond doll's latest Wicca-like incarnation, ready to "poison" young girls' minds



Listen up, naughty girls.


Do you long to be an "ordinary schoolgirl" by day who "transforms at night" into some sort of scary pink-robed glittery giggly perky blond pseudo-witch "magical enchantress" thing, perusing your "book of spells" with its plethora of "mysterious compartments" that "hold your secrets," along with recipes for concocting real potions "you can actually drink?"

You do? Well Jesus with an orgasmic wolf howl and some heavy goth eyeliner, are you ever in luck.

Because just in time for Halloween and just in time to make a few thousand hyper-Christian parental brows furrow with consternation and spiritual constipation, and just in time to make any true Wiccan roll her eyes and flick this story away like so much bad juju, here comes Secret Spells Barbie.

more...............

http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/g/a/2003/10/29/notes102903.DTL&nl=fix

[kimchi]

1. Too bad I didn't forward my idea to Mattel ten years ago.

As a joke my friend drew a "Pretty Witch Barbie", which reminded the consumer to buy Wizard William as her date. The um...specifics of his magical endowments were also mentioned. If I could find it and scan it you'd laugh until you cry.

[zbdent]

2. Don't forget "Swan Lake" Barbie (or whatever it is)

where the blasphemous buxom bitch is a bird by day, and a girl by night!

The Work of Satan!!!

Burn those executives at the stake!!

[DarkPhenyx]

3. OK, this has got to be my fav line.

About as seriously as Ken's deeply repressed desire for a Barbie-size strap-on and a serious S&M whipping.

Bwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!!!