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Ediacara Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-19-03 01:20 PM
Original message
'Family state' (Utah) high in abuse? | Salt Lake Tribune
'Family state' high in abuse?


By Carey Hamilton
The Salt Lake Tribune

Women in Salt Lake City are as much at risk for domestic violence as women in inner-city Los Angeles and other large cities, researchers at LDS Hospital have found.

Nearly 10 percent of the women treated in the emergency department of LDS Hospital in March 2001 reported that they had been the victim of intimate-partner abuse within the past year. Nearly 40 percent of women indicated they had been abused during their lifetime.

And the study found a significant correlation between suicidal tendencies and domestic violence, with 40 percent of women abused within the year saying they had considered suicide.

"We were thrilled that the research was completed, although saddened and concerned but not surprised by the results," said Jennifer Mackenzie with the YWCA, which operates shelters for domestic violence victims. "We think of Utah as the family state and don't believe domestic violence is prevalent here, but the fact is, it happens here."

More at the Salt Lake Tribune
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phaseolus Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-19-03 01:27 PM
Response to Original message
1. Not trying to be a Mormon-basher or anything, but...
...I have a question about Western US/Mormon culture since I know nothing about it, other than news reports about the crazier elements that kidnap or marry 13 year olds:

Just how patriarchal is that culture? Is extreme submission by women written into the doctrine of the LDS church?
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BiggJawn Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-19-03 02:03 PM
Response to Reply #1
2. They "used to" endorse one-man-many-women Polygamy...
what do you think?
Even though they claim to be against polygamy, I bet it still goes on.
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htuttle Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-19-03 02:07 PM
Response to Reply #2
3. Hmm.....
Does Pat Robertson think Mormons worship the same God as he does?

I mean, they added another book to the Bible, a couple of additional prophets, and approve of multiple wives -- starts to sound a lot like Islam...


(sarcasm?...not sure yet...get back to me later).
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mmm Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-19-03 03:20 PM
Response to Reply #2
8. you bet it does
and it's all about control and abuse
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bushisanidiot Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-19-03 03:41 PM
Response to Reply #1
10. Recovering Mormon Here..
it IS very patriarchal. When a mormon couple get's married or "sealed" in the "temple" it is supposedly for time and all eternity. Mormons believe this is the only way they will be together in heaven after they die. The thing is, if the woman dies, the man can remarry and get "sealed" to another wife because in heaven a man can have many wives. the woman however, can only be sealed to one man because women are not allowed to have more than one husband in heaven.

oh my gawd, i can't believe i participated in that crap..
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LifeDuringWartime Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-19-03 05:28 PM
Response to Reply #10
14. its ok…
better to be former member than current member, eh?
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pippin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-19-03 08:09 PM
Response to Reply #10
19. and they wear special under wear which they are never allowed
to remove. kid you not!
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cally Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-19-03 08:21 PM
Response to Reply #19
20. Only if they are married in a Temple...nt
..
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kainah Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-19-03 09:10 PM
Response to Reply #19
22. interesting history sidenote
The Indian messiah, Wovoka, who started the Ghost Dance craze was raised by Mormons & it is generally believed that his belief in ghost shirts (through which soldiers' bullets could not pass) was an adaptation of the Mormon temple garments. The Ghost Dance, of course, led to the killing of Sitting Bull which led to the Massacre at Wounded Knee.
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kainah Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-19-03 09:08 PM
Response to Reply #10
21. welcome to the land of the free-thinking again, bushisanidiot
I know a number of ex-Mormons. There is a website called exmormon.org that has some pretty interesting stuff on it. I've been battling the LDS Church for a couple years now over their treatment of stretches of the old westward emigrant trails (Oregon Trail, Mormon Trail, etc.) in central Wyoming. Talk about David & Goliath!!

Back on topic, though, this finding should not be at all surprising. Not only is the church extremely patriarchal but it is also a very closed society. You are expected to go first to the church for any help with any problems. And the elders are NOT likely to do much to tear the veil from real domestic abuse problems.

Mormonism, actually, is a very fascinating subject if you're interested in cults &/or social studies. I love to lure unsuspecting little Mormon boys -- commonly known as missionaries -- into my lair when they come knocking on my door. My first question is always, "Do you agree with the communist underpinnings of the LDS Church?" They sputter and protest but usually I know their history and practical tenets better than they do. My second question is whether they agree with Brigham Young's pronouncement that a lie told in service to the church is not a lie. If I get there, my third question concerns the 1857 Mountain Meadows Massacre. But, by that time, they're usually heading for the door. Great fun on a quiet Western morning. ;-)
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LiberalFighter Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-19-03 09:20 PM
Response to Reply #21
24. Saw a segment about the Jehovah Witnesses...
That had the requirement of seeking help from the church elders first. It had to do with child abuse.

According to the program, Jehovah Witnesses do not accept the word of anyone unless it is a confession or from two witnesses who must both be Jehovah Witnesses.

Also, that they would be encouraged to pray for help to be a better mother and wife. Even if it was the husband's fault.
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LiberalFighter Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-19-03 09:22 PM
Response to Reply #21
25. 1857 Mountain Meadows Massacre??
Is that about the assassination within the Mormon hierarchy?
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kainah Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-19-03 09:29 PM
Response to Reply #25
26. Mountain Meadows Massacre
more below on this but I'll answer you here, too. On Sept. 11, 1857, the Mormons of southern Utah massacred a wagon train of about 120 men, women & children heading to California on the southern emigrant trails. Then they blamed it on the Indians. About 20 years later, as the pressure built, they offered up one of their own as a sacrificial lamb and, after Brigham Young gave the OK, a Mormon jury convicted and condemned to death John D. Lee who was executed in Mountain Meadows shortly thereafter. Among his last pronouncements, Lee said that Young gave the orders & if Lee was telling the truth, Young would be dead within 6 months. About 5 months later, Young died.

The story is a fascinating one, rarely mentioned in history books. An excellent book by a friend of mine was just published on the subject: Blood of the Prophets: Brigham Young and the Mountain Meadows Massace by Will Bagley. (Univ of Oklahoma Press). Another one also recently came out entitled American Massacre by Sally Denton. (Knopf) Denton's is easier to read, wrong in several places, but essentially good. Bagley's is a masterpiece!
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pfitz59 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Dec-21-03 01:01 AM
Response to Reply #26
29. Small political side-note.....
Lee was a direct ancestor of the Udalls of Arizona. (Politically saavy folks know the name.)
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minkyboodle Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Dec-21-03 02:28 AM
Response to Reply #1
33. One thing to remember
is that the very structure of the church is inherently patriarchal. Leaving the whole pilagamy thing out (which really doesn't affect 98% of those calling themselves LDS) there is the whole priesthood issue. Only Mormon men can hold the priesthood (power to bless, administer the sacrament etch). Women aren't even part of the equation. In fact as a 12 year old boy you can hold a higher form of the priesthood than a women is ever able to attain. After the first hour of a mormon church adult males and women basically seperate for the next 2 hours. Men deal with matters of the scripture etc while women have what is called Relief Society where they deal with bible and scripture lessons but those that relate to their "duties" as homemakers. Honestly I don't know how women in the church stand it. In closing you'd be hard pressed to find a more patriarchal church in the US than LDS peeps. ugghhh having sunday 3 hour church flashbacks.... wheres my beer. :)
Scott
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gate of the sun Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-19-03 02:11 PM
Response to Original message
4. My brother and his girlfriend
worked as a counselor and psychologist in Moab Utah many years ago. My brother told me it was shameful how much abuse went on in the Mormon homes including sexual abuse.He said they were hypocrits. You can say this is an attack on their religion but this is what I was told and well this article suggest there was truth in what my brother told me.
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HawkerHurricane Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-19-03 02:11 PM
Response to Original message
5. Somehow, I'm not surprised
Amazing how much the 'pro family' movement consists of wife batterers.
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Judi Lynn Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-19-03 02:15 PM
Response to Original message
6. Interesting!
Edited on Fri Dec-19-03 02:18 PM by JudiLyn
Extreme fundamentalists have a hard time coping with the repressed rage a lot of them harbor. It does get out, explosively, from time to time, and the people around feel helpless to defend against it, as their group "religiosity" is intermingled, and none of them ever admits to anger.

Very rocky road, very isolated, very unrewarding. What a shame.

On edit:
From the people I've known like this, the chances for recovery, and a new start in life are negligible. The ones among them who get pounded on are actually usually the only likeable ones. Funny, isn't it?
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Voltaire99 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-19-03 03:52 PM
Response to Reply #6
12. Great post
Nice observations.

Mass obedience is the name of the game in most organized religion, and we can find similar repression working in fundamentalist Christianity, Catholicism, Judaism, Islam, anywhere.

The group has to cohere. So the self submits.

Blech! As Mr. T would say, I pity the foo'!
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noonwitch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-19-03 02:35 PM
Response to Original message
7. Kent County, MI has the highest per capita rate of child sexual abuse in
Michigan, and one of the highest in the country. This is the county Grand Rapids is in. GR is a very conservative religious place, the place where Scamway was founded and the voucher push emanates from. They also have a very high overall rape rate. The prosecutor says that it is because they don't plea bargain, which probably is a contributing factor. In a larger community, cases get pled down on a regular basis.
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Sean Reynolds Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-19-03 03:37 PM
Response to Original message
9. Salt Lake City was also just named the 9th most dangerous city.
Good times for the LDS City, eh?
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SemperEadem Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-19-03 03:50 PM
Response to Original message
11. I'm stunned that anyone would think that no demostic violence
goes on in Utah... what kind of hole have they been living in to even think that it wouldn't go on there?
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ellie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-19-03 03:54 PM
Response to Original message
13. I recently read
"Under the Banner of Heaven," by John Krakauer which was about the murder of a Mormon woman and her infant daughter by her polygamist Mormon brothers-in-law. It was really good. Krakauer traced the beginnings of the religion and how the polygamists split off when the church disowned them and how there are still communities that practice it. Mormonism has an extremely violent history, like a lot of religions, I suppose. I highly recommend this book!
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kainah Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-19-03 09:14 PM
Response to Reply #13
23. Excellent book -- Under the Banner of Heaven
Edited on Fri Dec-19-03 09:16 PM by kainah
And for anyone interested in history, check out: Blood of the Prophets: Brigham Young and the Mountain Meadows Massacre by Will Bagley. (University of Oklahoma Press.) It is a great look at the theocracy of Brigham Young and one of the nation's bloodiest massacres that you've probably never heard of. (Short version: On Sept 11, 1857, the Mormons of southern Utah slaughtered about 120 men, women, and children heading to California on the emigrant trails & then blamed it on the Indians.)
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0007 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Dec-21-03 07:48 AM
Response to Reply #23
34. I'll check the book out "Banner of Heaven"
What indeed opened my eyes to the Mormon religion was the "Constitution of Nevada" when I was going to school at the University of Nevada.

If the Constitution Of Nevada was ever taught in the Utah schools the religion would disolve. And I'm more than amazed why this truth isn't known in Utah.

I would appreciate any comment from anyone that has read the "Constitution Of Nevada"
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Missy Vixen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-19-03 05:40 PM
Response to Original message
15. I grew up down the street from a Mormon "stake"
>And the study found a significant correlation between suicidal tendencies and domestic violence, with 40 percent of women abused within the year saying they had considered suicide.<

My best friend in high school was a Mormon, and the middle child of nine. Her family was fairly normal. There were many that weren't, and we heard all about it over the years, including domestic abuse. Another fun statistic is the number of women in the Mormon faith being treated for depression.

I read "Secret Ceremonies" by Deborah Laake many years ago; it's still available on amazon.com. She discusses her upbringing in the Mormon faith and a disastrous marriage to another Mormon. It's fascinating reading. Even more interesting are the negative reviews -- when the book was first published, it took me months to get my hands on a copy. Why? There was a coordinated campaign (at least in our area,) to buy up every copy of the book as soon as it hit the shelves. I realize that this is a bit tinfoil, but I heard from more than one bookstore employee that they'd get a call inquiring about the book; if they had some, one or more women would quickly materialize in the store and purchase the entire stock. This went on for quite some time.

Julie
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cally Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-19-03 05:56 PM
Response to Reply #15
17. I also grew up around many Morman families
I was constantly asked to attend church parties and other social events. I never went because I didn't want to associate with the church. Even in HS, the Morman 'girls' were taught to be inferior to the 'boys'. I would hear stories about how they got in trouble for being too assertive. The culture stressed that males were more authoritative.

I also read the book. I found it fascinating since a few of my friend/acquaintances had temple weddings and I always wondered what happened in there.
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chasqui Donating Member (237 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-19-03 06:18 PM
Response to Reply #15
18. not tinfoil
That coordinated campaign is a tried and true tactic in the retail industry, and I do not see a reason why they wouldn't attempt the same thing for the purposes of censorship. The way it worked in the retail side is like this:
(a) Competitor offers a product we sell at a rock bottom price.
(b) We send our employees to go buy it with their money
(c) We reimburse the employees at the rate WE sell the product, minus a margin so that we can stay profitable.
The result is, well, the customer base does not associate the competitor with 'low prices.' And they do not get any associated sales frome sheer contact with their products. This would result in a de facto monopoly on a local basis for that 'thing.' I am not sure if this was legal or not, but, heck, I was just a lousy kid right out of HS at the time, and I bought a couple of those watchamacallits.
But, it still sticks me with me that RELIGION, in the hands of the morons results in stuff like this.
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BuelahWitch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-19-03 05:56 PM
Response to Original message
16. My first boyfriend's family were Filipino Mormons
Their oldest daughter married a Mo missionary and moved to Utah with him. They proceeded to bring the entire family over. He sexually abused her youngest sister and his own daughter and "got away with it" by threatening to have the family deported if they told on him. The daughter died in a auto accident some years later, and the abuser remarried. He did the same thing to his stepdaughters. I think he's now in the Utah state prison...
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cliss Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-20-03 09:28 PM
Response to Original message
27. What's the story with LDS?
I believe their official title is the "Church of Jesus and Latter Day Saints". What on earth do they have to do with Jesus? I heard they do not read the bible. I heard they only "borrowed" his name in their title because they were taking a lot of flak for being a cult. They probably figured that using Jesus bought them a lot of credibility. But -- the Latter Day "Saints" is what it's all about.

Just who are these "saints"? I was completely turned off when a girlfriend of mine, who is Mormon, said they were waiting to hear the trumpet call of the angel who sits on top of their temple. I asked her if that was the golden angel who's holding a trumpet.

She said, hes, that was Moroni (?) and when armageddon starts, the angel would blow his trumpet, and only the mormons will hear his call. They will then proceed to pack up their things, take a shotgun with them and head for Salt Lake City, where enough food has been stored to last those lucky survivalists for the next 50 years.

What was the shotgun for? I asked. Well, she said, that was to shoot any non-mormons who decide to tag along. Oh, I said.

Nice, caring church there.
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minkyboodle Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Dec-21-03 02:17 AM
Response to Reply #27
31. well as a former mormon maybe I can answer this
I was raised a mormon till I was about 12 and knew enough to say that I wanted no part in it. Firstly, all mormons are not created equal. I'm from the DC area and from what I've heard the mormons in Utah are a different breed from LDS people in the rest of the company. My parents were converts (mom got dragged in by dad). Mormons do read the bible. They read the King James version quite a lot and add to it 3 other books Book of Mormon, Doctrine & Convenants and the Pearl of Great Price. I am not defending the church as it has countless faults and is generally kooky in many ways but I have known many good people who were mormons who were not crazy right wing hating idealogues.... Anyway, I'm happy to be done with it but no mormon I never knew talked about taking a shotgun to Utah when Moroni sings. Believe it or not, many mormons treat it like many americans treat church a ritual on Sunday that they like to believe in but it doesn't dominate their lives.. Many do but generalizing isn't really fair IMO.
Scott
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AnnabelLee Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-20-03 09:54 PM
Response to Original message
28. A & E had a special on Mormons
Edited on Sat Dec-20-03 09:55 PM by AnnabelLee
& polygamy. There are "groups", i.e., very large families of polygamists that practice intermarriage, & young girls are often forcibly married to uncles or cousins who are usually much older than them. I saw an interview of a man & his three wives, & it was painful to watch. The women's faces were scored with lines of unhappiness & were closed & hard-looking. They have apparently bought into the "celestial marriage" thing that dictates they'll go to hell if they don't repress their natural feelings of wanting to be the only other person in a marriage besides their spouse. Very, very sad. A website that was mentioned on the program is Tapestry of Polygamy

On edit: Many of the men with multiple wives could not support their children, & taught them that the welfare system was created by god for them.
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PartyPooper Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Dec-21-03 01:49 AM
Response to Original message
30. And, the Mormon church isn't particulary fond of gays, either.
I understand that (like in the U.S. military) acknowledged gays are verboten from participating and worshipping in the church of LDS.

My partner and I were doing ancestral research in Salt Lake City a couple of months ago. We side-tripped to Park City. By chance we walked into an LDS "center". The "greeter" lady was very kind to us as she beckoned us in. We both hesitated. Of course, she wanted to know if we were "related"- or, "friends".

We were very polite (as we were taught and raised to be) and didn't tell her that we have been partners for 30 years. If we had, it would have been very awkward for her and the elderly lady sitting in a chair behind her. And, personally, I didn't want them to feel uncomfortable!

I have spent some time in Utah. I love the state and most of its people. Most folks are extremely hospitable.

But, unfortunately, Utah is in a time warp (as is most of the U.S.) One of these days I hope to travel with my partner throughout this country without feeling threatened because of our relationship. Most of the time we can, but, sometimes it is very dangerous-or, awkward for us.

Sadly, this reminds me of my partner's recollection of some time he spent on business in the South. He's originally from California...but, spent time in Dixie early in his career. One one occasion during the 70's, he recalls walking down the sidewalk in a small Southern town and a black woman removed herself from the sidewalk so HE (a white male) could pass. He could not believe it! Nor could I!

Until every single one of our citizens are treated equally with respect, dignity, and acceptance...without violence or, intimidation, or, oppression...none of us are truly free.

I apologize; I realize my post is a bit "off topic". But, this thread reminded me of these thoughts. And, I guess I've been itching to get them off my mind.

peace

O8)
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minkyboodle Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Dec-21-03 02:21 AM
Response to Reply #30
32. The mormon record on gay rights is a sad story
Edited on Sun Dec-21-03 02:33 AM by minkyboodle
Really it the most sad and dispicable part of the Church's history IMO. I'm sure you have heard the stories of aversion therapy at BYU etc and the abnormally high suicide rates among gay mormon men especially. What really gets me is now they try to say that they love all members including gays and accept them. Bullshit, they accept them as long as they live a celibate, lonely life while denying the essence of who they are. This and civil rights are several of the stains that the LDS currently bears IMO.
SCott
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