Reply #165: AND HE SAID: [View All]

[iverglas]

You say:

He is not unreasonable at all.
He said:
1) I accept ultimately it is her choice.
2) All things being equal, it would usually be the best idea to talk about such a relationship impacting decision with a partner.

And you, like just about everybody else here, have chosen to ignore the ACTUAL QUESTION ASKED in the post:

so isn't a good idea to at least suggest she see how her other half feels?

Why does no one want to answer that question??

THAT is the misogynistic "view on abortion" in issue here: the clearly implied assertion that IT IS A GOOD IDEA for some third party to "suggest" that a pregnant woman discuss her decision with her male partner.

And that view IS misogynistic, clearly and blatantly and for the love of all the dogs and cats.

Someone who believes that it is a good idea to "suggest" that a pregnant woman do anything, unless she has asked for his/her suggestions, which plainly is not the case in the scenario posited, plainly believes:

- at least some pregnant women are too stupid to figure out for themselves what course of action is best;

- s/he knows better than at least some pregnant woman what course of action is best for them, even though he has at best incomplete information, and at worse no information or incorrect information, about any given pregnant woman's situation; and/or

- s/he has no concern whatsoever for the well-being of the pregnant woman in question, since s/he has no way of knowing what might happen if the woman acted on his "suggestion" -- which could include physical harm to her at the partner's hands, or simply a life of unfulfilled aspirations if she is persuaded or coerced by the partner into changing her mind -- and yet proposes to offer that "suggestion" anyway.

No one would propose that s/he or anyone else make such an unsolicited "suggestion" to any pregnant woman -- and in this case, it is suggested that this is a good idea as a universal guideline, to be followed by anyone at all in dealing with any old pregnant woman at all -- if s/he did not believe that at least some pregnant women are stupid and/or that s/he knows better than at least some pregnant women what is best for them, or if s/he did not have the most supreme lack of regard for the well-being of whatever pregnant woman falls victim to his/her attentions.

And if any one of those characteristics are not indicative of misogyny, I don't really know what is.


So now why don't YOU answer the question:

so isn't a good idea to at least suggest she see how her other half feels?

It's really as simple as that.