Reply #56: As a teacher [View All]

[yasmina27]

with 20 years experience now :/ , I have to join in here.

I would never condone a colleague having an affair with a student, regardless of the age/gender difference.

When I was a new teacher of 21 years of age (and even as a student-teacher of 20) I had "crushes" on some of my older students (I taught HS). I NEVER EVER acted on those urges, knowing it was inappropriate. Had I run across one of those kids after they graduated - who knows, never happened so I can't say.

I've had students who had "crushes" on me, told me I was "hot" (this was 20 years ago! - before bearing children to a man who started teaching school when I was in 7th grade - no, he was not teaching in my school and I only met him after I started teaching!). I never encouraged them and always treated them with kindness and respect - nothing more.

I've known teachers who had affairs with students and gotten fired, and known teachers who had affairs with students who ended up getting married after the student graduated. I think there is a very fine line - particularly at the high school level where the girls dress to show off their newly acquired sexuality. If a male/female teacher has an affair with a male/female student who IS NOT ONE OF HIS STUDENTS, and is of legal age - jeez, wait 2, 6, 9 months until s/he graduates. For a teacher to have an affair with a student in his/her class, regardless of age is reprehensible - at any age. My best friend in college had an affair with a married professor while she was in his class. I'm sorry - that was WRONG - on both their parts, but more on his, because he was married and had her grade under his control. She was wrong because she was stupid - and I told her that.