Reply #49: Relax, enjoy, and live for the time AFTER the wedding. [View All]

[blondeatlast]

Every one of my friends--every one of six--who had a huge blowout wedding with months or even a year of preparation is now divorced and with only one exception, unhappily so. Most are still arguing well after the divorce--I think that says a great deal about what went into the relationship.

Mr. B and I had a teensy little wedding and spent our time planning a lovely trip to Hawai'i and the home we would buy upon our return. In retrospect, we thought about the MARRIAGE rather than the wedding even though we weren't conscious of that at the time.

Eleven years, one beautiful son, and some truly trying times later (regarding ill health and the temptation of another) we are as happy as we ever were if not more so. We don't try for anything, we just deal with problems as we encounter them; always with the idea that we will get through the tough times together.

FWIW, he's of another culture and I think that adds just enough to keep us both interested in each other--always a different perspective on any situation.