I don't get it..I'm never GOING to get it... [View All]

[youthere]

Just got off the phone with my sister. I hadn't talked to her in awhile, and since I had a fight with my mom yesterday I was looking to vent.
Anyway, in chatting with my sister I asked if she was having a big get together. She mentioned her daughters were coming and I asked if my nephew was going to make it and she launched into a twenty minute diatribe about how as long as he was playing around with that "gay" crap he didn't need to bother showing up...blah blah blah. Her son (my nephew) is 25 and came out to the family almost a year ago. His partner is his best buddy from high school.
Now the funny part is, that my nephew and his partner have been to my sister's house for holidays and get togethers before..
Three years ago they were both there for Christmas..Two years ago they were there for Christmas..hell LAST year they were there for Christmas..this year..they aren't welcome. The only thing that has changed is that now we know for a FACT that they are intimate..rather than merely SUSPECT. No one was really shocked when he came out. We all kind of "knew" he was gay. So why was it okay and they were welcomed when we "kind of knew" and it's not okay now that we know for sure?
My nephew and his partner are the exact same people that we have known and loved for the last (in my nephew's case) 25 years, they haven't changed..
I've been trying to understand or make sense of why all of a sudden some in my family just "can't be around them" anymore. Because they are gay? They've been around those two before and they were gay then.
My nephew is still the same sweet, thoughtful kid with the most adorable dimples and the same gorgeous curly hair. His best friend (and partner) is the same funny and kind guy with the great smile who plays a mean guitar. They are the same kids who stole the Schnapps in 10th grade and got drunk behind the school. They are the same kids who played basketball together (all staters I might add). They are the same kids who painted my mom's house and they are the same kids we helped move into their first college apartment. And they were gay then.
To be fair,most of my family could care less and things haven't changed a bit since my nephew confirmed their suspicions..my nephew's coming out was kind of a "What you're gay? That's nice..pass the gravy" moment. But there's my sister and her hateful rant. There's my brother who now shifts uncomfortably around the same kid he used to shoot hoops and go fishing with. He can't even look him in the eye. And of course there are the scattered few ultra religious in the tribe who are teribly sad these two young men will spend eternity in hell.
Maybe I'm naive..but I just can't seem to get my mind around it. Sigh.