A Plea for Prayers [View All]

[Fenris]

First off, this post is not about me. Well, not directly anyway, but I suppose posting this involves some sort of self interest. This is more about two people I love very dearly, and one I do not.

The first person is my mother. My mother is the dearest person in my life. She has raised three seriously fucked up children (not her fault, mind you) for over 30 years (my older brother is 32; she had him at age 19) and has done so with very little concern about her own happiness and well-being. She has always been there for me, and has stuck by her husband, in spite of who he is, purely out of interest for her children. But now, at age 51, she is unraveling. I have left the nest, my brother has long been gone, and life at home with my sister and my father is becoming unbearable. There is a very real possibility that she and my father will not be together much longer, and a woman who was once a rock to two unstable children is now being eroded by one child with no sense and a husband with no compassion.

The second person is my sister. She and I grew up together, two years apart, never fighting like most children do. We were allies in a common struggle against our parents. But we drifted, like all do, and in high school, she changed. Smoking, drinking, using drugs, and, worst of all, in an abusive relationship with a drug-addled felon and mental deficient. She drifted further and further, drifting in and out of good and bad periods. After she ended her relationship with the felon, we thought she was getting back on track. That was, until, we noticed she seemed to have a larger belly. And she stopped smoking. She revealed, eventually, that she was indeed, not one person, but two. And had been for four months. And she had not told anyone. And she was not yet 18.

That was enough to break all of our hearts, but after realizing what would have to be done, we were devastated. I have always supported a woman's right to her body. But it was now close to home. Suddenly, it lost the safety of theory and became reality. We became that which people in the South try to run from. But we all knew that this was a no option situation.

Well almost all of us.

The third person in my story is my father. I do not love my father as I know he does not love me. He is one-half of the reason I exist, which I suppose makes me attached to him somehow. He is a brutal, humorless man, cold and calculating, utterly tactless, and devoid of anything nearing compassion. He is violent in temper and does not suffer anyone gladly. Not me. Not my brother or sister. And not my dear mother. He knows about my sister's problem, but aside from fronting the money, he is detached. I could accept that, if that were all there was to it. But he has decided to place guilt (as if there were any) upon my mother. Indeed, he has decided to remind my mother in cruel and rude ways, that what she and my sister are having done is an abomination in the eyes of the religious world (despite his lack of religion he feels qualified to speak for the Pope). He also reminds my mother that this is her progeny that will be expunged. At a time when love is the only thing that could keep us together, he takes it upon himself to hate us.

I thought this evening about driving back 3 hours to my home, abandoning my studies, just so I could kick my father in the balls and punch him in the face. I find his actions inexcusable and outright inhuman. But I know I cannot. It would solve nothing. I cannot do anything from here except offer moral support.

I am not religious, and in fact am quite an atheist, but I ask the believers of this site, the spiritual, to offer three prayers. One is for my mother, so that she might find the strength to survive this ordeal. One is for my sister, so that she might come to realize the impact of what she has done and what she will soon do. And one is for my father, so that he might see his inhumanity and change his wretched ways.

A fourth prayer, I ask, be offered for the bit of flesh, bone, and blood at the center of this strife. I ask that his soul be prayed for, so that he might know that this was not a life he would have wanted.

And please - do not opine on the controversial issue here. This is not your life, and it is not your decision. Be thankful for that.

All is in God's Hands now.