Welcome to the mildly hallucinogenic DUzy Awards, recognizing exceptional snark, enlivening satire and epigrammatic sass from the past week on DU. Congratulations to this week's winners!
The DUzy Awards might just be announced every Friday night. Previous awards can be found in my journal.
Note to Mods: Skinner has authorized the DUzy Awards to be posted in GD.
The DUzy Academy Executive Board: alittlelark, flvegan, Ghost in the Machine, Lucinda and QueenOfCalifornia. Special thanks to awoke_in_2003, jmowreader, FlyingSquirrel, babylonsister, eleny, Jack Rabbit, AwakeAtLast, dixiegrrrrl, EFerrari, wryter2000, ColbertWatcher, Commie Pinko Dirtbag and NanceGreggs for their invaluable assistance with this edition.
Following rocktivity's suggestion, Vice President Biden becomes only the second recipient of an Honorary DUzy Award for this quip. On a thread by The Straight Story: Non-Kosher Hot Dog Incites Rage At Jewish Eatery"It was an all-out frankfurter frenzy this week at a popular Jewish restaurant in Brooklyn, as a certain hot dog caused a near-riot...
The long-time patron says the chaos broke out when he and a rabbi noticed the frankfurters on the grill were non-Kosher, in a restaurant that's supposed to be dishing out the Kosher variety.
'The package didn't look Kosher,' the patron said. 'It was the last piece in the package.'
Some customers were quick to defend the worker, who was surrounded by, according to some witnesses, a hundred enraged people.
'He just got angry,' the patron said. 'He wasn't about to do anything to the guys.'
The rabbi, who originally certified the Shawarma King restaurant Kosher, has written a letter to the community in a Jewish newspaper. In the letter, he calls the frankfurter mix-up a 'terrible mistake.'
The rabbi tells the community that a worker was sent out to buy hot dogs, and that he went to the wrong market and bought non-Kosher hot dogs..."
gratuitous:
The Obama administration is ahead of scheduleNon-kosher hot dogs weren't supposed to be introduced until
after all the guns had been confiscated.
GD, March 23, 2009: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x5315478 On a thread by XemaSab: Would you want to live near a wind farm? HysteryDiagnosis:
I used to live near Palm Beach Florida. Rush Limbaugh lived there...so does this count? I got nauseated once in awhile when I put the NIB thingy on the air.
liberal N proud:
That is a wind bagBut you have to worry about the stink from that one.
Environment/Energy, March 23, 2009: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=115x190865 OP by malaise: Holy Shite AIG changes their nameAIU - Bwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! American Insurance Underwriters. Should have been undertakers - they've killed the fugging world economy.
Rachel I'm cracking up here. :rofl:
How stupid are these people? How gullible do they think we are? :puke:
ContinentalOp:
That'll work.Someone should get a bonus for this. Good work guys.
soothsayer:
AIU? Should be IOU, shouldn't it? Bozita:
I prefer FU2 ddeclue:
Corporate Witness Protection Program...Shouldn't AIG at least have to roll over on a few brokerage houses before entering the CWPP?
:rofl:
GD, March 23, 2009: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x5317600 Poll question by HopeHoops: If McCain had won...I don't expect many votes for the first option.
:bluebox: WOO HOO - I'm an asshole and would have LOVED THAT!
:bluebox: Moscow would be toast, but so would DC, NY, LA, and probably Toledo.
:bluebox: Iran would be toast, but so would everything within range of Israel
:bluebox: Sarah Palin would have another $6,000,000 worth of clothes
:bluebox: Todd Palin would be fishing.
:bluebox: Dick Cheney would stop saying "Whaaaa".
:bluebox: The last of the seven seals would be broken and - well, you know.
:bluebox: Sarah would have done him in with her "moose technique" - and then "WHERE'S THE BUTTON?"
:bluebox: Is he still alive?
:bluebox: Who's Sarah?
At press time, "Sarah would have done him in with her 'moose technique' - and then 'WHERE'S THE BUTTON?'" was winning with 40% of the votes.
The Lounge, March 23, 2009: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=105x8632462
OP by nichomachus: If you go by the numbers, Obama has been a miserable failureHe's been in office over two months now, and he hasn't killed the "Number 2 Person in Al Qaida" even once.
The Bush administration killed Al Qaida's Number 2 guy at least once every 10 days.
How in the hell can we win if we don't keep taking out the Number 2 guy?
Tangerine LaBamba:
Good point ............Also, where is our Orange Alert?
Do I have to do all the work myself and scare myself into a panic, or is my government going to help me out?
GD, March 25, 2009: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x5328146 On a thread by Proud Liberal Dem: Why SHOULD Obama have spoken out immediately about the AIG bonuses? rpannier:
Because his not answering shows a lack of resolute leadershipLet me give you a few examples of how the last administration would have shown this leadership
1. Bush would have gone on vacation and been using his stunt double to remove brush from his ranch for photo shots. He'd have told us how they were on top of the whole situation and that he had complete faith in the people handling it. Then he'd have told us he understood it was tough, but he wasn't worried (because he had a job)
2. Bush would have gone to France gotten on his bike and run over some French Security Guard and made jokes about to distract people from the tanking economy. While Hannity, O'lielly and Beck would have blamed the security guy for getting in the presidents way.
3. He'd have made a powerpoint presentation that showed the 'comedy' of the crisis. You know 1) Him looking under the bed to see if the bottom of the economy was there; 2)Him standing around an unemployment line wondering if he could be next; 3)Him selling a guy the rope to hang himself after he lost his job and pension at the age of 59. And making a joke like, "This is one way to turn lemons into lemonade."
4. The question never would have been asked because it never would have been cleared by the people who vet the questions Bush receives -- and then Ed Henry would be blacklisted from ever asking a question again.
The fact is, it is a fairly irrelevant question. The question was not that obscene and I think people are making too much of it.
I do think it seems more like a question you'd expect the Southside Grocery Shopper to ask.
Henry looked like an ass and yes, Obama did looked miffed at the question.
Mostly (I think) because of all the questions the Senior White House Correspondent could have asked, he chose one that is basically a throw-away question -- Kind of like Chris Collinsworth asking a Head Coach after they lost the Super Bowl on the last play of the game 31-30 "Are you disappointed you didn't win?"
GDP, March 26, 2009: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=132x8293008 On a thread by Amerigo Vespucci: Former Palin aide: "This set off a nerve for sure with a lot of people..." Oh, you betcha."'So I'm looking around for somebody to pray with, I just need maybe a little help, maybe a little extra,' she said of the moments before the debate. 'And the McCain campaign, love 'em, you know, they're a lot of people around me, but nobody I could find that I wanted to hold hands with and pray.'
A handful of the McCain campaign staffers who traveled with the former vice presidential nominee nearly every day for two months caught wind of Palin's remarks on Thursday morning — and they aren't thrilled with her quip.
'We all talked this A.M.,' said one former Palin aide in an e-mail. 'This set off a nerve for sure with a lot of people...'"
NRaleighLiberal:
I can see her irrelevance from my house.GD, March 26, 2009: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x5338669 On a thread by kpete: Reid: Roberts 'didn't tell us the truth'"Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid said Friday that John Roberts misled the Senate during his confirmation hearings by pretending to be a moderate — and that the United States is now 'stuck' with him as chief justice..."
Guy Whitey Corngood:
AP BREAKING: Girl named Lucy takes away football as a Mr Charles Brown is about to kick it. nt Captain Hilts:
"It's not the first time she's done it," Ms. Van Pelt's brother, Linus, told officials. ntLBN, March 27, 2009: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=102x3803583 OP by Kurt_and_Hunter: Steele: I called out Rush as a stratagem to see where everyone was on the chessboard Steele: "I called out Rush as a stratagem to see where everyone was on the chessboard"
Steele unspoken but implied: "I apologized to Rush the next day because I found out where everyone was on the chessboard, and it wasn't pretty"
Marsala:
I walked into the ambush to pinpoint the enemies' locations.I dove into the Amazon to find the piranha. I threw rocks at the nest to flush out the hornets. I jumped off the cliff to locate the ground.
GDP, March 27, 2009: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=132x8296369 On a locked thread: I'm circumsized and I like my cock
cbayer: Locking
Thanks for letting us know, but It's just TIM.
Cheers,
cbayer
DU Moderator
cbayer: Oops.
I meant TMI.
:hide:
GD, March 26, 2009
OP by Frank Booth:
OK, DU, time to chill out with some cool PICS of our great leader!GDP, March 23, 2009:
http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=132x8284783OP by Uzybone:
Our new aggresive media.GDP, March 25, 2009:
http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=132x8291047OP by MrScorpio:
DU (un)Official Complaint Departmentresponse #3 by WilliamPittresponse #4 by taterguyresponse #6 by MrScorpioresponse #12 by taterguyresponse #15 by MrScorpioresponse #21 by Chemical BillThe Lounge (moved from GD), March 25, 2009:
http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=105x8637873OP by underpants:
Early roughdrafts of Bush's memoirs leaked by publisherresponse #1 by billybob537GDP, March 26, 2009:
http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=132x8292989