Things to Say to Recruiters When They Call for Your Kids
mondo joe
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Fri Jun-17-05 11:07 AM
Original message |
Things to Say to Recruiters When They Call for Your Kids |
|
"I'd be glad to get my son. I don't mind saying my period has been kind of weird ever since I gave birth to him. Sometimes it's heavy, sometimes it's light - and right now is really one of those heavy days. Sometimes..."
|
clydefrand
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Fri Jun-17-05 11:10 AM
Response to Original message |
1. I'll wait until the president's daughters go into combat and then |
|
I'll think about your having access to my children.
|
mondo joe
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Fri Jun-17-05 11:13 AM
Response to Original message |
2. My son is in his bedroom listening to Barbra Streisand CDs and |
|
ironing his jeans. Hold on - I'll get him."
|
Blue-Jay
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Fri Jun-17-05 11:19 AM
Response to Reply #2 |
jmm
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Fri Jun-17-05 11:13 AM
Response to Original message |
3. Why waste your time with my child when |
|
I'm sure you'd have better luck calling the local young Republican clubs and pro-war protesters. I'm sure they're dying (pun intended) to enlist.
|
Deep13
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Fri Jun-17-05 11:15 AM
Response to Original message |
4. "You will have to wait a few minutes. ... |
|
... it takes a while to get around in a wheelchair."
|
ismnotwasm
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Fri Jun-17-05 11:18 AM
Response to Original message |
5. He's not home right now |
|
Do you mind posting bail?
|
Deep13
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Fri Jun-17-05 11:19 AM
Response to Reply #5 |
Cannikin
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Fri Jun-17-05 11:20 AM
Response to Reply #5 |
Enraged_Ape
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Fri Jun-17-05 11:20 AM
Response to Original message |
8. He's upstairs with his boyfriend tripping on windowpane acid |
Cannikin
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Fri Jun-17-05 11:21 AM
Response to Reply #8 |
10. I really would love to hear a response to that |
Deep13
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Fri Jun-17-05 11:25 AM
Response to Original message |
11. Just as soon as he is done praying to Allah. |
mondo joe
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Fri Jun-17-05 11:27 AM
Response to Reply #11 |
13. "Ali, put down your prayer beads and come get the phone!" |
Shoeempress
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Fri Jun-17-05 11:26 AM
Response to Original message |
12. Why, have all the Republicans already enlisted? |
micrometer_50
(367 posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Fri Jun-17-05 11:28 AM
Response to Original message |
14. He's in prison right now, |
|
can I have him call you back in 3 to 5 years?
|
Deep13
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Fri Jun-17-05 11:32 AM
Response to Reply #14 |
18. for murdering authority figures. |
|
Edited on Fri Jun-17-05 11:33 AM by Deep13
"He'll be fine in the army as long as no one tries to tell him what to do."
|
micrometer_50
(367 posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Fri Jun-17-05 11:42 AM
Response to Reply #18 |
|
he's in for armed burgulary.
:cry:
|
LeftPeopleFinishFirst
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Fri Jun-17-05 11:28 AM
Response to Original message |
15. "I'll have him call you back after his date with Marcus" |
Deep13
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Fri Jun-17-05 11:28 AM
Response to Original message |
16. "Why? Our mission has already been accomplished." |
radwriter0555
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Fri Jun-17-05 11:30 AM
Original message |
"Hi, I'm Joey's home visitation physical therapist..." |
Heidi
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Fri Jun-17-05 11:30 AM
Response to Original message |
17. "No thanks, I'm planning to kill him/her myself without |
|
government assistance. But hey, thanks for the offer!"
|
Midlodemocrat
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Fri Jun-17-05 11:34 AM
Response to Reply #17 |
19. LOL. That is very funny! |
Heidi
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Fri Jun-17-05 11:59 AM
Response to Reply #19 |
22. It's all kind of fuzzy now . . . |
|
but I have what seems like a memory of my mother saying that very thing to a recruiter who called our house in 1980. :rofl:
|
WeRQ4U
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Fri Jun-17-05 11:50 AM
Response to Original message |
21. "I'd rather help my son pay student loans than let you kill him." OR... |
|
"The family is planning a trip overseas this summer anyway. And this way, we won't get shot at."
|
Kraklen
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Fri Jun-17-05 12:01 PM
Response to Original message |
23. I'll have him give you a call as soon as he gets back from the |
|
bathhouse. He loves men in uniform.
|
Cannikin
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Fri Jun-17-05 12:02 PM
Response to Reply #23 |
madinmaryland
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Fri Jun-17-05 12:03 PM
Response to Original message |
25. Uhh, he has other priorities for the next several years, |
|
but he supports the war! :evilgrin:
|
Deep13
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Fri Jun-17-05 12:04 PM
Response to Original message |
26. You can talk to him when I am done changing the filter for his iron lung. |
Liberalynn
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Fri Jun-17-05 12:05 PM
Response to Original message |
27. It Will Take Him a few minutes |
|
Edited on Fri Jun-17-05 12:06 PM by Liberalynn
he just got a new pair of six inch heels and he's had trouble getting around in them.
or
"Now son put down that knife, Mommy didn't mean to eat the last Ding Dong."
|
JohnKleeb
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Fri Jun-17-05 12:06 PM
Response to Original message |
28. sure heres a good one |
|
Yeah I'll have him call you back but him and his boyfriends are looking for a place in Dupont Circle to live.
|
Deep13
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Fri Jun-17-05 12:08 PM
Response to Original message |
29. "What are you wearing?" |
mondo joe
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Fri Jun-17-05 12:16 PM
Response to Original message |
30. "It might take him a minute - he's breaking in his new stilettos |
|
and the phone is clear across the living room."
|
Deep13
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Fri Jun-17-05 02:30 PM
Response to Original message |
31. He's returned to Saturn to report to our galactic commander. |
DU
AdBot (1000+ posts) |
Wed Jun 12th 2024, 08:52 AM
Response to Original message |
Powered by DCForum+ Version 1.1 Copyright 1997-2002 DCScripts.com
Software has been extensively modified by the DU administrators
Important Notices: By participating on this discussion
board, visitors agree to abide by the rules outlined on our Rules
page. Messages posted on the Democratic Underground Discussion Forums are the
opinions of the individuals who post them, and do not necessarily represent
the opinions of Democratic Underground, LLC.